


Dead but Delicious: a paranormal soap opera

by barullera



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band), The Beatles (Band), What We Do in the Shadows (2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Vampire, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2019-09-28 00:16:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 50,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17172230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barullera/pseuds/barullera
Summary: Based on this post https://barullera.tumblr.com/post/181401612156/i-am-now-thinking-about-a-what-we-do-in-the (which happens to be my own, but I just couldn't resist!)





	1. Band Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not a native speaker of English and I didn't have a beta, so this is probably riddled with mistakes. Sorry in advance.

‘Is Tim coming?’ asked Freddie without looking up.

  
He was painting his nails on the kitchen table, the only surface free of clutter in the whole house. He was wearing a white kimono decorated with colourful koi fish and his eyes were artfully painted with black eyeliner. How he managed to do his makeup without using mirror was a mystery, but he never showed up without it and in less than perfect condition. Delilah, his favourite cat, was purring on his lap.

  
Next to Freddie sat Roger, wearing a bloodstained open shirt and leather trousers. He had found some old knitting magazines in the attic and that had started a knitting frenzy. He was very enthusiastic about gifting his oddly shaped creations to his friends and was deeply hurt when said friends didn’t show the appropriate appreciation for them. Just last week he had locked himself in his cupboard because Freddie refused to wear the knitted leotard he made for his birthday.

  
Brian sighed and moved some dirty glasses around to make room for his papers.

  
‘Tim is 8000 years old, he is not going to be at the meeting’

  
Roger looked up, confused. ‘What do you mean he is not going to be at the meeting?’

  
‘Listen, Rog, I know he is your friend and you love him, but it has been ten years since our last gig and Tim has been becoming more and more…’

  
‘Bat-ty,’ supplied Freddie, with the smirk of someone whose pun was very much intended.

  
‘Tired,’ amended Brian more diplomatically, throwing Fred a look.

  
‘We have to face it, darling. It’s time.’

  
‘Time for what? What are you saying?’ asked Rog, tears filling his eyes. He tried to put down his knitting but found no space and didn’t want to risk getting blood on it, so he just hanged it from his shoulders. Then his hands were free to be placed on his hips, a pose that always spelled trouble for the band. ‘Are you implying…?’

  
‘I’m not implying anything, I’m saying it outright, we need a new bass player’

  
Roger stood up, another sign of trouble.

  
‘You backstabbing bastard! Tim is our friend you can’t do that to him! You selfish sonofabitch!’

  
Now Brian stood up and towered over Roger.

  
‘Selfish! How can you call me that when all I do is look after you idiots!’

  
‘Who are you calling an idiot?’ screamed Roger starting to levitate.

  
Furious, Brian started to levitate too. No more words were exchanged just angry hissing and occasional swats aimed at each other. Freddie rolled his eyes, with his nails freshly painted there was no chance he was getting involved in this.

  
‘Children, children, this is not time for your games, the Unholy Mascarade is in less than two months. We can’t waste any time quarreling. If we want to make our comeback then, we will need to start thinking pragmatically.’

  
Although it has been many years since Freddie used his powers fully, his voice still held that magic tone that compelled people to obey him. It wasn’t really effective with other vampires, but it had a calming effect on his bandmates. Soon, they were back on their sits, a little ruffled but not worse for wear.

  
‘Fine, what do you propose we do?’ asked Roger going back to his knitting and still throwing dirty looks on Brian’s direction.

  
‘Well, I guess we can go to the back door of some venue after a concert and just, you know, snatch us a bassist,’ suggested Freddie.

  
‘That’s not a bad idea. Is there a newspaper around? We could check what bands are playing this week and have our pick. Freddie and I can lure them away with our sex appeal and Brian, you can put a bag over their head and…’

  
‘What?! No, that’s a terrible plan…’ exclaimed Brian.

  
‘Look, Brian, not all of us can be seductresses. And it’s not that you are ugly, you are a fine looking man and I’m sure some people find you very appealing, darling. But having a curly-haired giant waiting for them in a dark alley is going to scare them away, you know you have that Big Bird serial killer vibe. While these two beauties, well, who wouldn’t want to be lured away by us?’ added Freddie with a wink.

  
‘That’s not… Wait, I would be a fine seductress. I’m just more subtle than you two and anyway, I prefer to get to know someone before.... seductrissing them’ pouted Brian.

  
‘Of course you do’ Roger patted the thin guitarist, he could never stay mad at him for long.

  
‘But that’s beside the point! We can’t kidnap a bassist, that’s ridiculous! They won’t want to play if they are here against their will and the last thing we need is to attract attention to this house. Think of all the bodies we have buried here, it would be a disaster!’

  
‘What do you suggest then, dear?’ asked Freddie.

  
Later that night, Brian made his way through the empty halls of the University, reached the board and hang a flyer. It took him ten minutes to get it just right and when he finished, he admired his work.

GREAT OPPORTUNITY!  
Band of completely normal, night-prone humans are looking to add bassist to the group. Must own their own bass and not be squirmish. Liking cats is a must. Orphans, out-of-town people and antisocials specially welcome. Hemophiliacs need not apply.  
For more information or to request an audition, write to….

 

‘Perfect’ thought Brian, ‘a perfectly normal flyer. Nobody would suspect anything strange.’ Happy with his job, he went back outside where the others were waiting. All they had to do now was wait until someone took the bait.


	2. Great opportunity!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John takes the bait and the band prepares for his audition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! I'm terrible at finishing things so I don't know how long I'll be able to keep this story up, but I'm having a lot of fun writing it. Still no beta, so there are many mistakes probably.

John frowned. He had gone by the flyer three times already, stopping, reading it again, shaking his head and continuing. Now he was in class and he couldn't take it out of his mind. Some of the words made alarm bells sound in his head, but at the same time, he couldn't avoid being a little charmed by it. Sure, they guys sounded a bit eccentric, but maybe that's what he needed. 

Since moving to London and starting university, he has been looking for a band in which to play. He has been in many auditions and people has praised his playing, but ultimately he always ended up being rejected. People often found his shyness and calmness unsettling. And when he did speak, they thought his sense of humour strange. He was never a good fit.   
'A great opportunity' he muttered under his breath. Those guys sounded like a bunch of weirdoes, but whose to say it wasn't with them that he would find his place? What did he have to lose?

When the class came to an end, John picked his things up in a hurry and left. Soon, he found himself in front of the flyer again, but this time he was smiling. 

GREAT OPPORTUNITY!

He ripped the flyer from the board and rushed to his dorm room. He had a letter to compose.

\--o--

'This is bullshit' complained Roger. He was wearing a pair of orange rubber gloves and was furiously scrubbing some blood-stained glasses.

'Now Roger, darling, we talked about this. It's your turn to do the dishes. Actually, it has been your turn to do the dishes for the last five years.'

'But we are vampires! Vampires don't do dishes!' retorted the angry blond sending soapy, bloody water everywhere.

Freddie tutted and grabbed a mop. He was in a good mood, normally he would have thrown the mop over Roger's head.

'Some vampires do. And the house is a mess. We can't have guests with the house looking like this. It's so embarrassing!' Freddie finished cleaning the floor and went back to drying crystal glasses.

'Why? We bring people over to kill them! What does it matter what the house looks like?' asked Roger.

'Because we don't want to kill this one. He's coming to audition, not to be eaten. We need a bassist, Roger. We can't screw this up' insisted Freddie. They had only had one answer to their flyer. John seemed like a perfectly nice man. He even sent them a record with him playing, but it was in a strange silver disk and they couldn't get it out.

'I found the vacuum cleaner!' exclaimed Brian entering the kitchen, his hair was full of dust and cobwebs 'It was under a pile of wool in Roger's cupboard.'

'You were in my cupboard without my permission?!' almost screamed Roger. He looked agitated. 'You didn't find anything else, didn't you?'

'What would I find?' asked Brian confused.

'Nothing' Roger visibly calmed and continued with his task.

Brian shrugged and plugged the vacuum. In a minute, he was floating around the room getting rid of the cobwebs that had invaded the high corners of their house. Freddie, on the other hand, looked at Roger with suspicion. He was hiding something, but now it was not the time to pursue that investigation. He made a mental note to find out later and continue his work.

'I still think we should convert the guy as soon as we can. If he is our only chance, then we shouldn't let him get away. What do you think, Bri? As soon as he is in the house, we locked the door and his ours! Then we wouldn't have to do all this stupid cleaning.'

'But first, we have to see if he is a good fit for us. And we haven't heard him play, he might be terrible. We need to get to know him. And he has to like us too. We have to make a good impression.' answered Brian as another spider jumped into his curls. He didn't mind getting rid of the cobwebs, but he couldn't kill the little guys, he wasn't heartless. 

'You heard that, Roger? We need to be in our best behaviour. He needs to think that we are just three regular guys, so act normal!' exclaimed Freddie.

'What about Tim?' asked Roger.

'He will have to stay in the basement, there is no way we can explain him' answered Freddie.

Roger finally finished washing the dishes. He took off the rubber gloves, grabbed a dishcloth and started to help Freddie with the drying.

'Why is it so important to you to get the band together for this the Unholy Mascarade, Fred? If it doesn't work now, we can always do it next year, it's not like it matters anyway.'

'Well, Roger, it does matter because every year we say we are going to start taking the band seriously and we never do. We need to be more proactive!' answer Freddie without looking up.

'So this doesn't have anything to do with a certain garden gnome who is thinking about moving back to Ireland next year?' asked Brian. 

If Freddie could blush, he would have blushed then. But he hadn't had anything to eat that night, so there wasn't enough blood in his system to even slightly tint his cheeks. 

'Jim? Please, like that course little goblin could be my type.' 

'Jim? Really?' asked Roger smiling and wagging his eyebrows at Freddie.

'Weird, a big manly gnome like him seems exactly you type' said Brian with a smirk, going back to the floor and unplugging the vacuum cleaner. 

'Well, you are wrong. And I'm not his type either, so there. I don't want to talk about this anymore.' Freddie put the dishcloth down and left the kitchen visibly upset.

Roger and Brian shared a look.

'Let's give him some space. We need to finish tidying up anyway. We can talk to him later,' suggested Brian. 

'Fine. When is this human that we can't eat coming over anyway?'

'Tomorrow at eight. Plenty of time after sunset for us to get ready. And remember, he can't suspect anything, so we should...'

'Act normal! I know, I know.' Roger frowned and grabbed a broom. It was going to be a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I imagine Jim as a garden gnome to look exactly like you would imagine a gnome to look like, except with a moustache and human size. Please comment and tell me what you think!


	3. Act normal!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John finally meets the band.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, no beta.

'Good night, darling!' 

Brian opened his eyes and was startled to see, not the inside of his coffin, but a grinning Freddie staring down at him. 

'Jesus, Fred what are you doing? Is it even dark yet?' Brian sat down up rubbing the sleepiness out of his eyes. He was usually the one to wake up first and then had the job of waking the others. He checked his alarm clock, it read 5:45. 

'It's nearly dark, so it's fine. And I'm just excited! I need to pick an outfit and I need someone to tell me what they think. And I also need to pick an outfit for you.' said Freddie, already rummaging among Brian's clothing trying to find something adequate. 

'Wait, an outfit? What's wrong with what I am wearing?' huffed Brian a little offended. He looked down, he was wearing a dark coat, a clean shirt with a nice white waistcoat and his favourite cravat, and white trousers. 

'Nothing, if you are planning on taking Elizabeth Bennet to the ball. But I'm afraid we need something more exciting to meet our new bassist, we are a rock band after all.'

'So he's our new bassist now?' teased Brian. As annoyed as he was at Freddie for barging into his room and criticizing his wardrobe, he was glad to see him so happy. 

'I have such a good feeling about him, darling. I just know he is the one.' He gave Brian a pile of clothes he had specially selected for him, 'Let's try some of these. We need to look our best!'

'How come Roger has not been roped into this?' asked Brian as they made their way into the living room. 

'He does fine on his own' replied Freddie without looking at Brian.

'You tried to wake him up and he hissed and tried to bite you' stated Brian matter-of-factly. 

'He can be such a bitch sometimes, and believe me I should now. But don't worry, I have something prepared for him already for when he wakes up. We are going to look fabulous! Now try this,' he handed Brian some clothes and then started to look for something for himself.

After half an hour of Brian and Freddie tirelessly putting on and taking off different articles of clothing, Roger waltzed into the living room. As he helped Brian into the next outfit, Freddie pointed to a pile of clothes in the corner and Roger went to inspect it, picking one out, trying it against his body and then discarding it again. Freddie noticed that, every so often, the drummer would throw a look at Brian and frown. He made a mental note of it and filed it under 'Things to investigate later'. 

By five to eight, they were already standing by the front door waiting for their visitor to arrive. 

'Remember to act normal!' whispered Brian.

'And remember not to bite him' Freddie whispered looking at Roger.

'What if we don't like him and he is a shit bassist?' asked Roger in a low voice.

'I guess that's fine, but put some towels on the floor. Blood is impossible to wash from the rug.' conceded Freddie.

'We are vampires! We don't put towels!' retorted Roger.

'Well, do it in the bathroom then. A lot easier to clean, ' suggested Freddie.

Brian, standing in the middle of the two whispering vampires, rolled his eyes.

'Can we meet him before we decide where to kill him?' he asked.

'Fine' agreed the other two. 

They waited in silence.

\--o--

John was standing in front of the door. He had arrived a bit early and was waiting a few minutes to ring the bell. 

The big house loomed before him. It looked to be Victorian in design, and it might have been a very nice house once upon a time, but now it looked creepy and neglected; the garden, overgrown and unkempt, was filled with patches of fresh earth, as if someone had just been digging around recently. A shiver went down his spine. He checked the address again. He also re-read the invitation he had received in the mail asking him, in very fancy handwriting, to come that day at eight for an audition. 

He believed he could hear low voices on the other side of the door and he thought he could make out the word 'kill' and 'blood' among the whispers. His heart started to pound and he took a step back, hugging the case that contained his bass. Silenced enveloped him again, interrupted only by the breeze and the gentle rustle of the trees. A bat flew out of one of the house's windows. He took another step back.

'This is a big mistake' he said aloud. He tried to move his feet but found it impossible, he was rooted to the spot, unable to move.

Suddenly, the door opened. Three figures stood before him. The light coming from the house made impossible for him to see more than shapes, but at that moment, they looked menacing. Like hunters stalking a prey. He took another step back, but this time he stumbled with something and fell to the floor. 

'I told you I could hear something!' a voice said. 

In a second, three young men stepped out of the house and surrounded him. One of them placed his black-nailed hand on the bassist's shoulder, a look of concern in his face. He asked John if he was ok. His voice was soft and soothing and immediately calmed him down, allowing him to focus on the figures. 

The man who had spoken to him had straight black shoulder-length hair and heavily eye-lined eyes. He was very slim and he was wearing what looked like a harlequin leotard with a leather jacket and little else. 

Next to him, was a very tall man with a shocking mop of curly hair and a top hat. He was wearing what looked like a puffy pirate shirt only halfway buttoned up, a red scarf tied around his thin waist and very tight black pants. His nails were painted white. He was also looking at John with concern. 

The third man was shorter. He had long blonde hair and very blue eyes. He was wearing a heavily patterned open blouse with nothing underneath, a bright silk scarf around his neck and leather pants. He had a very pleasant face but was scowing at John rather menacingly. 

It was then that John started to laugh. And, to the astonishment of the other, he continued laughing for a good while. He was laying on the floor of the strangest house he had ever been, surrounded by the most outlandish people he has ever met. He felt as if he had fallen through a hole and into a strange and ridiculous world. John in Wonderland. 

'And if I'm Alice, then you must be the Rabbit, the Mad-hatter and the Cheshire cat' he said with a smile, hardly realizing he had spoken out loud.

'I think he must have hit his head when he fell' said the Hatter, sounding worried.

'I think he is just crazy' said the Cheshire cat scowling. 

But the third man was smiling.

'Nonsense, I think he is perfect,' he helped John back on his feet and put his arm around his shoulders, 'And darling, the rabbit? really? If something, I am actually the Queen of hearts'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed it! I love comments, so don't hesitate to leave me some!
> 
> By the way, every time I thought about writing this guys meeting, I kept thinking about this https://youtu.be/yTt_Dx5Ch_0?t=145


	4. Down the rabbit hole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Awkward auditions and band fights. Not everyone is happy about John.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No beta and no actual musical knowledge about how bands work. Just so you know.

John took a sip of water while six pairs of eyes stared at him intently. They were sitting in what looked like the kitchen of the house. Everything looked pristine but strangely... bereft. There wasn't any food in sight, not even a refrigerator. Maybe they ate a lot of takeouts, thought John.

'So John, I hope you are feeling better' said the man who had introduced himself as Freddie. He was smiling kindly at him. One of the other men, Brian, was also looking at him with a small smile. On the other hand, the third one, Roger, remained standing by the door and looked at him with suspicion.

'Mm yes... sorry. I guess this whole place just got to me. It's very... erm... unique. And at this hour, this neighbourhood can be a little scary, with the abandoned houses and, you know... trees'

'Well, you never know what kind of thing is lurking in the dark waiting to eat you' commented Roger with a smile. However, unlike the friendly smiles of the other, his was menacing. It took John a moment to realise why: teeth. The other's smiles had been warm and sincere, but tightlipped. Roger's smile was wide and showed sharp teeth poking out of his mouth. He looked away, not wanting to make him feel self-conscious. Orthodontics was very expensive, not everyone could afford it.

'ROGER' said Brian sharply.

'Well, it's true BRIAN, this is not a nice neighbourhood, it can be dangerous at night.' retorted Roger, blue eyes wide and innocent-looking.

'You don't have to worry about that, dear' Freddie assured him, ' nobody here is going to eat you'

'HURT YOU, he means hurt you' clarified Brian quickly, throwing Freddie a look. 'Nobody's thinking about eating you, obviously'

'I didn't think anybody was? I mean, maybe I should have asked before coming, but you are not cannibals, right?' joked John.

'Cannibals! Of course not, we don't eat other vam...' said Roger

'PEOPLE, of course we don't eat people. That's ridiculous. Who would do that? Some kind of monsters, but not these monsters haha. Not that we are monsters at all. We are regular people' Brian stopped talking when Freddie very visibly kicked him under the table.

'You'll have to forgive us, we are very excited to meet you' said Freddie.

'No, don't worry about it.' John smiled. Every time he had gone to auditions, the members of the bands have always been cool and collected, acting aloof and sure of themselves, which made John feel uncomfortable in his own skin. But this guys' awkwardness made him feel more at home, like he could actually fit in with them.

'Why don't you tell us a bit about yourself, John' prompted Freddie.

'Well, I don't now if there is much to tell. I am 18, I am studying Electronic Engineering and I used to live in Leicester. I only moved to London a couple of months ago.

'Electronic Engineering? Really?' Brian looked very interested, but Freddie quickly cut him off.

'And how long have you been playing the bass?'

'A few years. I used to play with a school band back home, but since I moved here I haven't been able to find someone to play with.' answered John, then shyly added 'Have you been playing together long?'

'Hundred of years or so' answered Freddie

'FEELS LIKE A HUNDRED YEARS, because people don't live that long, remember Freddie?' added Brian, but John just laughed.

'I know what that's like. When you hit it off with your band, it seems like you have always known each other, like you have been together since forever' It made John feel a little intimidated. He didn't think that entering a group that was so close-knit would be easy.

'You see Brian, he gets it' smiled Freddie. 'It was our friend Tim who put the band together. We were all lonely and miserable, not a friend in the world, and then Tim came along and... changed us. He is a bit like a father to us.'

'And he is not in the band anymore? Is that why you are looking for a replacement?'

Roger snorted, but the other two ignored him.

'Yes. He is older now and has... other interests' answer Brian.

Roger made a noise that sounded like 'Please', but Freddie quickly covered it by standing up and clapping his hands.

'Well, I think it's time to start your audition. I'm really looking forward to hearing you play, darling' he said 'Let's go to the music room.'

'Mm, ok, great' suddenly all nervousness was back in John. He grabbed his bass and followed Freddie. The other two followed behind whispering. He could guess Brian was admonishing Roger for his attitude. It had bothered John a bit, but now that he knew about Tim, he understood a bit better. Maybe the blonde had been especially close to the ex-bassist.

The music room seemed to be just the room in which the band kept their instruments, there wasn't any soundproof or anything like that. There was a set of drums, a piano and a few guitars, but also more unusual instruments like a harp, a gong, maracas, and other things that he didn't know.

'You can play all these?' asked John.

'Well, not really. But we like to experiment a bit sometimes' answered Brian.

Roger was already sitting behind the drums doing adjustments. Freddie took his jacket off and stood in front of the microphone. Brian was strapping a beautiful red electric guitar. He noticed John looking at it.

'You like it? I built it myself' he was obviously very proud of it.

'Really? It's amazing!' exclaimed John getting closer. Brian explained to him the guitar's characteristics and John was fascinated.

'HEY!' Roger shouted angrily ' I thought we were supposed to be playing'

'No need to shout, dear. But I'm afraid Roger is right, once Brian gets started about His Lady he could talk four hours.' said Freddie smiling at the guitarist.

'Sorry' said Brian blushing a little.

'So tell us a bit about your style, John' asked Freddie.

'Well, mostly what you heard on the CD but I'm very adaptable, I can play anything'

'Your CD?'

'Yeah, the CD I sent you with the letter?'

'Ah, of course! Sorry, we couldn't play it' laughed Freddie.

'Oh' John blushed and looked at his feet. Of course, he should have thought that not everyone had a CD player nowadays. 'Sorry' he muttered'

Freddie seemed to feel the bassist discomfort and added, 'No, don't worry about it. We are not the most technological of bands. In any case, what better way to test you than to see how you play with us. How about we start a little something and you follow us.'

'O-ok, I can try'

'Excellent!' smiled Freddie. 'How about 'Doing Alright?', boys?'

 

\--O--

 

Two hours later Roger, Brian and Freddie said goodbye to John and then went to the kitchen.

'Well, I think he is the one!' exclaimed Freddie.

'Are you serious? He's like mouse, he wouldn't last a day in our world!' said Roger angrily 'And he is not even that good'

'What do you mean? He was excellent! And with our help, he will fit right in. He will have our protection!'

'So great, so now we also have to be his nannies. Brian, back me up! This is ridiculous!'

'I actually really liked him' he said softly without looking at Roger, who looked devastated at not having Brian's support.

'There you have it, darling! Two against one. We have to write to him to let him know' said Freddie happily, but before he could move, Roger stood up.

'Well, I hope you are happy! You are destroying the band!' he shouted teary-eyed.

'Roger, what band? There was an inch of dust covering our instruments yesterday. It's obvious that before today, we were barely a band. This is the push that we need to go big.'

'Well, it's destroying our friendship! Just because you want to get off with that stupid gnome. And for what? The moment you do, you are going to lose interest and discard him like you always do. Why do you think this time is different? And you!' he said pointing at Brian 'you were supposed to be my friend, and all you did today was berate me and ignore me, and all for the sake of that mousy-face, mediocre bassist. You find someone to speak science with and suddenly I'm nothing to you. Well, you can both go to hell! You'll have to find a drummer next!' and with that, Roger turned around and walk away.

Brian could see Freddie clutching the table, eyes red, body shaking with fury. He could see the singer was about to unleash hell on Roger, but that was the last thing they needed.

'Hey, Fred. Don't worry about it,' he said, grabbing his hand, trying to calm him down 'you know Roger, he hates change. Let's just give him some space and I'm sure he'll come around.'

Freddie nodded and looked away.

'Do you think he's right? About Jim, I mean.' he asked Brian softly. 'Because it feels different, I don't feel the same way about him as I did the others. I think he is special, and I want to show him that I am special too, that I can do something of myself'

'Of course I don't agree with him and neither does he, really. He was just upset. You'll see, Roger will come around and, with John, we'll be a hit at the Marquerade. Jim won't be able to resist you'

'Well, of course he won't' Freddie finally looked at Brian and gave him a watery smile 'I already have everything planned. It will be perfect!'


	5. Drummer lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A certain drummer goes missing. What will the band do to get him back?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, no beta. The many mistakes that lie therein all belong to me.

Neither Brian nor Freddie saw Roger for two nights in a row. While by the third night, Brian was starting to become worried about this, Freddie was still mad about the blonde's words and his lack of apology,  and he was determined to move on with his plans for the band. He had written to John to let him know about the band's decision and to arrange to meet with him again. Brian thought that it would have been best to fix things with Roger first, but there was not stopping Freddie when he was on a  mission. And his mission was to get the band ready for the Unholy Masquerade.   
  
Brian looked at the clock and sighed. John was coming around eight. That gave him plenty of time to wake Roger up and have a talk with him, try to fix things and prepare the drummer for John's visit.   
  
He went to the cupboard where the drummer slept and knocked on the door.   
  
'Roger, are you in there? It's half past seven.' He received no response and tried again 'Come on, Rog. I just want to talk with you a little bit. I am very worried.' Again no response. 'I'm coming in!' he finally announced, the cupboard was empty, completely empty. No Roger, but also not knitting pattern magazines, no wool and needles, no mess of bright-coloured clothing, no car models, no nothing. It looked like a regular cupboard.    
  
'Freddie!' shouted Brian, 'FREDDIE!'   
  
Freddie rushed to Brian's side alarmed. It was not often that the softly-spoken guitarist rose his voice.    
  
'What happened?!'   
  
'Roger is not here.'   
  
'Good, I don't want him bothering John again. He will scare him off!'   
  
'But where is he?' Brian sounded upset and Freddie sighed. He had always been very protective of Roger, even more than of Freddie or Tim. The singer supposed that it was because Roger was the youngest and the most reckless of the three. And it was in the guitarist's nature to protect those he perceived as vulnerable.    
  
'He must be hiding somewhere, he will come back soon enough. Don't worry' said Freddie kindly trying to placate the curly-haired vampire.   
  
'But Fred, look!' he pointed at the cupboard 'He took everything! I don't think he is planning to come back!'  Brian was on the brink of tears. He felt so guilty, he shouldn't have left Roger on his own, he should have insisted they talk and fix things sooner.   
  
'What?!' Freddie entered the cupboard as if hoping to find Roger things hidden in a corner, but the small space was bare, not even a cobweb left. Freddie had been mad at Roger, but he still loved him, he was part of his family and didn't want to see him go. He started to match Brian's despair.   
  
'We don't even know how long has he been gone! What if something happened to him!'   
  
'He could be dead in a ditch for all we know! Or maybe he fell asleep on a bench and now he is dust! And us here, without even noticing!'   
  
'We were horrible to him! I was horrible to him! He might have died thinking that we hated him!'   
  
'This is all our fault! We were so selfish!'   
  
'No! I was so selfish! You just wanted to help me! This is all MY fault!'   
  
'Fred, no! Don't think that!'   
  
'Brian!' Freddie embraced him.   
  
'Fred!' They cried together for a while.    
  
A sharp cough interrupted them and they looked up. John was standing there holding his bass to his chest tightly.    
  
'Erm, I'm sorry, I've been knocking but nobody answered and the door was unlocked and the street was so dark, I didn't want to stay there alone, so I just came in. I didn't mean to interrupt... this. Are... are you ok?'   
  
'John! Roger's gone!' screamed Freddie as he flung himself to the unsuspecting bassist, who dropped his bass in surprise and caught the singer in his arms. Soon, Brian also joined the hug, surrounding the other two with his long arms. John felt a little overwhelmed, he wasn't used to this much physical contact. He thought it would feel hot and oppressive to be so surrounded by people, but it actually felt cool and calming.    
  
'It's terrible' said the guitarist, muffled by Freddie's hair.    
  
'I'm so sorry' said John softly trying to grant some comfort, 'How did it happen?'   
  
'We don't know' said Brian without moving an inch, 'We had a fight the other day and he threatened to leave, but he always does that. We didn't think he actually meant it this time'   
  
'Wait,' said John trying to extricate himself from the octopus-like embrace of the other men 'he is alive then? I thought...'   
  
'But we don't know! Roger has never been great at fending for himself and it has been days!' said Freddie miserably still attached to John's arm.  There was some comfort in the warmth emanating for the human.    
  
'Well, does he have any other friends? He might be with them'   
  
'No! We are all he has!' exclaimed Freddie dramatically.   
  
'Well, there's Miami.' admitted Brian.   
  
'Miami wouldn't let Roger stay! He knows him too well. The last time he almost burned the nightclub down' retorted Freddie.   
  
'Maybe. But maybe he's heard something. There are other vamp... people who may let Roger stay with them.    
  
'Well, if this Miami may know something, we can go ask him' proposed John.   
  
'Well, it is a start' conceded Freddie 'Better than staying here and doing nothing. Give me a minute to change, I can't show myself there in this rags.'   
  
'Freddie wait! Aren't you forgetting something?' said Brian giving Freddie a pointed look.    
  
'Of course!' exclaimed Freddie, 'the band meeting! Well, we'll just have to postpone it'   
  
'No, Freddie!' said Brian exasperated, 'I mean, you know, J-O-H-N. We can't take him to Miami Sunset, you know the kind of place it is, we shouldn't expose him to... you know, alcohol. He's too young. We wouldn't like to... corrupt him'   
  
'Is he?' Freddie eyed him. Having been a vampire for so long, it had become hard for him to determine such things.    
  
'You know I can spell, right? And I'm also right here' said John annoyed, just because he was the youngest, it didn't mean he should be treated as a child.   
  
'No, Brian is right. It may be too dangerous.' accepted Freddie. 'You can stay here and  wait to see if Roger turns up.'   
  
'Erm, Fred? What about Tim? You know how he is when he gets... peckish?'   
  
'You are right' agreed Freddie. 'John, dear, maybe it's best if you go home and let us deal with it. We'll contact you another day'.   
  
'No.'   
  
'What?'   
  
'I said no. I am a member of the band now, I have as much right as you to help. And I want to help. I am tougher than I look. And you know, I have been exposed to alcohol before. I have even been known to drink it on occasion.' he said teasingly.   
  
'Well, when you put it like that...'    
  
'Freddie... ' warned Brian.   
  
Freddie stood in front of John, took his chin and forced him to look right into his eyes.   
  
'You will notice nothing out of the ordinary.'   
  
John's eyes became unfocused for a second and then sharpened again.   
  
'Are we going or not?' he demanded.   
  
'I'm going to change! Back in a tick' Freddie said winking at Brian and disappeared down the hall.    
  
'He'll be at least forty minutes' said Brian grabbing John by the arm and leading him to the kitchen. 'Come on, I'll give you some water. You need to stay hydrated.'   
  
'Oh, ok. I don't suppose you have some tea, right?'   
  
'Uh, no. We are not big tea drinkers'   
  
'Coffee?'   
  
'No, sorry. I should have anticipated that you liked drinking different things' said Brian miserably 'I'll try to get more things tomorrow.'   
  
'No, please, don't bother. I didn't mean to be ungrateful, water would be great' quickly said John, cheeks reddening.   
  
'Nonsense, we want to make you feel welcome here. You are one of us now.' said Brian with a small smile, patting his arm.

  
  
/\oo/\ 

  
  
Miami Sunset was a big place, made bigger by the fact that is was almost deserted. Only about 20 people occupied the tables, and the dance floor was completely empty. The walls were decorated with the colours of a sunset and some fake palm trees, and the chairs and tables were painted in different bright neon colours. A bouncer welcomed them at the door and, although he looked at John suspiciously, he didn't ask for his id.    
  
Everyone turned to look at them when they entered. Brian put a protective arm in front of John and pushed him behind him.    
  
'Boys' a silky voice said. From the shadows came a man wearing a neat suit, he looked like he belonged in a board meeting or a courtroom, rather than the tacky neon colours of the club.   
  
'Miami Beach' said Freddie with a smile.   
  
'I haven't seen you three in a while. Keeping out of trouble?'   
  
'Of course, you know us' answer Freddie smoothly.   
  
'But that isn't Mr Taylor there in the back, surely. So silent and shy. New friend?'   
  
'Yes' said Brian shortly. 'About Roger...?'    
  
'But let me see him better, you know I like to know everyone around and I've never ...' Miami stood in front of John and looked at him intently. The bassist looked uncomfortable.   
  
'Come to my booth' he said sharply. The others followed him. His booth was in a dark corner, slightly elevated from the rest of the floor.    
  
'Please tell me you brought your lunch with you' he said once they were seated.   
  
'No, Miami, this is John. John Deacon. He is our new bassist.'   
  
'Charming. And so alive.' said Miami pointedly looking at Freddie.    
  
'Well, we needed some new blood. The band was going nowhere and with Tim in the way he is...'   
  
'Freddie, cut the bullshit' said Miami. His voice was low and calm, which made it sound even more menacing.' You came here and you bring this... boy with you and you expect me to say nothing? Do you know how dangerous it is?'   
  
'I am not afraid!' exclaimed John.   
  
'You have been hypnotised and don't know what you are talking about.' retorted Miami.   
  
'What?' said John confused.    
  
'It's fine dear, don't worry.'    
  
'Look, we needed to come here. We lost Roger.'   
  
'You what? How? How do you lose a grown man?'   
  
'We had a fight and now he isn't at home and all his things are gone' said Freddie desperately. 'You haven't seen him, haven't you?'   
  
'Has it occurred to you that he is not there because he doesn't want to be there?'   
  
'No, because Roger wouldn't leave us like that. We are his family.' answered Brian.   
  
Miami rolled his eyes.   
  
'He was here yesterday. I saw him talking with  Ray Foster and his gang.'   
  
'What?! Those trolls?! Why was he talking to them?'   
  
'I neither know nor care. Now go and take your tasty snack with you. He's probably safe from others of your kind, but you know we cater to all sorts here...'   
  
With that Miami stood up and walked away, leaving the three men sitting on the table, trying to figure out how to continue.   
  
'Ray Foster! Do you think he's with him?' asked Freddie.   
  
'If he is, he is in danger. Those guys are always up to no good.' answered Brian.   
  
'We have to rescue him!' determined Freddie.    
  
'Yes, but what should we do with J...'   
  
'I'm coming with you! I spent a semester in America. I know all about gangs. I even have a knife' said John taking a small knife from his sock.   
  
'Why do you even have that?!' asked Freddie alarmed.   
  
'Are you kidding? Have you seen your neighbourhood? Not very friendly.'   
  
'That's it then.' Freddie smiled to Brian.   
  
'Fine.' said the tall vampire. 'We should go to the park, they usually hang out under that bridge next to the lake'.   
  
'Ugh, I didn't bring the shoes for that.'   
  
'No time to change, I'm afraid'   
  
'Fine, but if there is too much mud, I'm getting a piggyback ride.'


	6. Drummer found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The adventure continues, they face an enemy and they meet a familiar face.

'Well, well, well. Look what we have here? Looks like we have some visitors.' Ray Foster said to his followers in a loud voice. He was big and fat, even more so than the others. His face was covered in boils, scars and hair. He was wearing a tracksuit of bright yellow. He looked at the three of them hungrily, focusing especially on John.   
  
'And look! How courteous, they brought us something to eat! You shouldn't have' he smirked. John tightened his hold on the knife.    
  
'None of that' said Freddie imperiously 'we came for Roger, is he here?'   
  
'Who the hell is Roger?' asked Foster.   
  
'Don't play dumb. Roger Taylor, long blond hair, blue eyes, sailor's mouth.'   
  
'Ah, yes, that little morsel. Why would he be here?'   
  
'He was seen talking to you yesterday at Miami Sunset'   
  
'Well, we just talked, I didn't do anything to him'   
  
'And what did you talked about?'   
  
'This and that. Then he left and I didn't see him again.'    
  
'Is he telling the truth, Fred?'   
  
The singer stared at him for a moment.   
  
'Yes' he said finally.   
  
'Ok then, thank you very much but we should get going' Brian indicated to the others that they should follow him, but suddenly they found themselves surrounded by the rest of Foster's gang.   
  
'I'm sorry guys, you can't leave. You bloodsuckers are not my type. But I'm taking the live one there. I'm getting a craving  for fresh meat.'   
  
'Well, you'll have to fight us for him!' shouted Brian.   
  
'That's how we like it' laughed Foster, he made a sign to the others and left. In an instant, the gang was on the three men. Brian and Freddie were hissing, John was waving his knife around. One of the trolls got close and scratched Brian's face, another tried to grab Freddie's hair and received a kick in the stomach. The creatures made a grab for the bassist, but his knife was quicker and soon he was slashing his way through the gang.   
  
However, the trolls were too many and eventually cornered them against a wall. They started to advance and the three men got ready to continue the fight when...   
  
'What the hell is going on here?' a resonant voiced made everything shake. The trolls looked back. Against the light, there was the figure of a man. He looked big and tall, and was wearing a conical hat.    
  
The man took a step towards the trolls and grabbed one by the hair.   
  
'You better leave these three alone, or you are going to be fighting me next. You know there is no bloodshed allowed here.' He let the troll go, it fell on the floor with a thud. Quickly he got up again and ran away with the others following him.    
  
The mysterious figure suddenly took another step and the moonlight illuminated his face. He was wearing a green plaited shirt, brown trousers and a red hat.    
  
'Jim!' screamed Freddie.   
  
'Freddie? What are you doing here?' Jim asked, taking a good look at them.    
  
'WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT WERE THOSE CREATURES?!' John sounded upset and confused. He started to walk away trembling, but Brian grabbed him before he could get away.'   
  
'Shit, sorry I got distracted for some reason' Freddie was bright red. He took Johns face in his hands and said 'Sleep'   
  
John fell asleep instantly, slumping against Brian, who in turn fell to the floor. Freddie turned his attention back to Jim.    
  
'You shaved your beard! I like it, the moustache looks much better on you' said the singer with a smile.   
  
'You think?' Jim smiled back 'I wasn't so sure, but... Wait a minute! Don't try to distract me. What are you doing here? What happened?'   
  
'We came here to rescue Roger' came a muffled voiced from under John.   
  
'Brian, is that you? What happened to Roger?'   
  
'He disappeared. We thought Ray Foster had him, but we were wrong.' answered Freddie.   
  
'And who is this?' asked Jim pointing a John.   
  
'Oh, this is John, our new bassist.'   
  
'He is alive. And human.'   
  
'Yes and yes.'   
  
'You seem close.' commented Jim.   
  
'He is my friend and bandmate, nothing more. If something he is closer to Brian, I mean look! he is literally sleeping on top of him! And right in the open, where everyone can see. Disgraceful!'   
  
Brian rolled his eyes.    
  
'If you say so.  You should get back home, sunset is in a few hours.'   
  
'Right' said Freddie looking at the pile of bodies that was Brian and John. 'I'll just pick him up, shall I?' He tried to grab him by the legs but they slipped away and Freddie ended up with John shoes in his hands. He looked down on them helplessly.   
  
Jim sighed.    
  
'I'll help you' he picked John as if he didn't weight more than a loaf of bread.    
  
'You are so strong' said Freddie caressing Jim's biceps. The gnome's whole face became bright red and he looked down smiling.   
  
'It's nothing.' 

  
  
/\oo/\ 

  
  
The first thing they heard when they came to the house was a loud voice screaming at them.   
  
'Where the hell have you been?!' Roger appeared through the door. He was covered in blood. He cleaned his mouth with his sleeve and continued talking. 'I was worried sick!'   
  
Both Freddie and Brian lunged towards the blonde and enveloped him in a tight embrace.    
  
'What's going on? What happened?' asked Roger, now sounding calmer.   
  
'We thought you have left! All your things were gone and you were nowhere to be found! We went to look for you! We had to fight trolls!' explained Freddie.   
  
'Oh, I just moved everything them to the attic. The cupboard was getting cramped. Wait, are you telling me that because it was empty you just assumed I had left without checking the rest of the house?'   
  
'We were upset' said Brian softly, looking down.   
  
'You were? For me? You really care that much?' asked Roger with a smile.   
  
'Of course we do! We are family!' answer Freddie.   
  
'Wait, what is HIM doing here?' Roger pointed at the door, where Jim was awkwardly standing, still holding John.   
  
'Jim helped us. He was wonderful and so dashing. He appeared just in time...'   
  
'Not Jim, I mean him!' Roger pointed at John.   
  
'Rog, when John heard you were missing he insisted that he should come to help you. He really is a great guy.' Brian spoke softly.   
  
'And you should see him with a knife. Very impressive!'   
  
'Oh' was all Roger could say.    
  
'Why don't you come with me, Rog. We can talk for a bit' Brian guided Roger to his room and Freddie was left with Jim and the sleeping John.   
  
'Where should I put him?' ask Jim.   
  
'Let's go to the living room, it's prob... ' Freddie opened the living room's door and then closed it right away. 'And not even a towel, the little shit!' he swore, then remember Jim was there and smiled at him.   
  
'There is a sofa in the music room' He guided the gnome there and he laid the bassist among silk plush cushions.   
  
'I need to go, the others are probably wondering where I am and the sun is almost up, you should be going into your coffin soon. I just wanted to make sure you were all fine' Jim voice was low, almost a whisper.   
  
'Of course' Freddie looked a bit sad. 'I'll walk you to the door'   
  
'No need. And at this time, you shouldn't risk getting any sunlight. I know the way, anyway.' He turned to go and turned back 'One more thing. It seemed that John doesn't know about you being vampires? And I think you should tell him about you and the others. Either that or let him go. It's unfair for you to put him in danger when he doesn't really understand it. He seems like a nice guy and deserves that at least.'   
  
'I... yeah, I think you may be right.'    
  
Jim started to walk away.   
  
'Jim! Wait!' Freddie ran to him until he was standing right in front of him and then he gave him a big kiss on the cheek 'Thank you for... you know, everything.'   
  
Jim was speechless, he just nodded and walked to the door, red as a tomato. Freddie looked at him with a smile on his lips.    



	7. Of coffins, bats and scurvy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Strange sleeping arrangements and misunderstandings galore!

Brian led Roger to his room. He wanted to talk with him, but also he wanted to give Freddie and Jim some privacy. It was about time those two idiots realised they were in love with each other and both thinking that the other couldn't possibly return their feelings.

Jim and Brian had been friends for some time, despite the animosity that existed between the two races. Gnomes saw vampires as lazy parasites that did nothing but kill humans, look down on other creatures and act like they were the stars of the supernatural world. Vampires thought gnomes were boring, badly dressed and a little preachy, always going on about how other creatures should be doing this and saving that.

Jim was different though. They had met in the outskirts of town, where Jim's garden was and where Brian had followed a badger he had been trying to befriend. They bonded over their love of animals and, since then, Brian had often visited the gnome and his garden, cooed to the animals that lived there and watched the stars far away from the city lights.

Lost in his thoughts, Brian didn't realise that they were already in his room and he had been standing there for ten solid minutes without saying anything. Roger was looking at him intently.

'Sorry' he muttered, embarrassed. But Roger smiled at him softly.

'Don't worry about it' he looked around the room 'This is nice. A little sparse, though'

'Thanks' answered Brian awkwardly. 'Maybe we should sit.'

Roger looked around.

'No chairs' he commented.

'Oh'

'How about the coffin?' asked Roger hopefully 'It'd be a close fit, but that's alright, right? What's a little closeness between friends? Nothing weird about sharing a coffin with a pal, right?'

'I guess. But take your clothes off first' said Brian folding his long legs and sitting inside the coffin.

'Brian!' Roger exclaimed wagging his eyebrows 'I never knew you could be so forward!'

'None of that!' said Brian loudly 'I just don't want to get the interior dirty. It's silk, and blood is a nightmare to clean.'

'Whatever you say' said Roger with a wink.

Brian looked away feeling the heat rising to his cheeks, he decided to change the subject.

'How did you get so bloody anyway?'

'Hit an artery' answered Roger, as he joined Brian in the coffin. He had been right, it was a tight fit, but not unpleasant.

'I hope you put some towels down. My nice couch is in the living room.'

'The red one?'

'White'

'Well, it's red now'   
  
Brian just took a deep breath. He adds ' ex-nice white couch' to his mental list of things to discuss in the next meeting.

'So' said Roger, after a few minutes of silence.

'So' repeated Brian. 'This is awkward'

'You are the one who asked me to undress'

'No, I mean... Yes, but it's not about that'

'So you feel comfortable having me be naked with you in your coffin' Roger got a bit closer.

'You are not naked' pointed Brian out.

'Do you want me to be?' smirked the blonde.

'That's not... I wasn't... I meant...'

Roger was about to get even closer when a quick movement caught his attention.

'Bri, what was that?'

'What was what?'

'What thing?'

'That thing that just flew through the window and into your head.'

'Oh, that thing! That was nothing. What were you saying about being naked?'

'Don't try to distract me! Come here!'

Roger tried to get at Brian's hair, but the tall guitarist used his thin limbs and body to try to wiggle out, like a worm. They were still in a coffin, so there was no place to hide. Soon enough, Roger was straddling Brian and parting his long hair. Two tiny eyes stared back a Roger.

'Bri, I don't want to scare you' he whispered ' but there is a bat in your hair'

'Oh, really? Must be Benny, he usually comes back around this hour' said the guitarist nonchalantly.

The tiny bat was comfortably nestled in the middle of Brian curls. He looked at Roger with annoyance, then turned around and buried himself further in the hair until there was no sign of him.

It was at that moment, that Freddie made an entrance. Wearing his silk Chinese robe and carrying Delilah in his arms.

'Darlings, John's off until tomorrow and I think ...' Then he saw Brian half-lying, half-sitting in his coffin with a semi-naked Roger straddling him and with his hands buried in the guitarist's hair, they both looked flushed and out of air.

A smirk spread on Freddie's face.

'Well, would you look at this?' he purred.

'It's not what it looks like!' Cried Roger. He took his hands away from Brian's hair and tried to shift to another position, but again, they were in a coffin, so space was lacking.

Freddie just smirked.

'No, don't make that face. Nothing was happening. This is completely innocent'

'Of course, just two vampires in their underwear sharing a coffin and petting each other'

'I'm not in my underwear' pointed out Brian

'Silly me, that makes all the difference' replied Freddie.

'There was a bat in Brian's hair!' exclaimed Roger.

'Benny, yes'

'And then-- wait, you know him?'

'Sure, those of us who are observant and don't spend all of our time staring at one's bandmate's mouth, or hands, or ass, we notice little things like that.'

'What?' asked Brian looking at Freddie confused. Roger hurried to veer the conversation in another direction.

'So how long had this been going on?' he asked the guitarist. Freddie moved on to sit in the border of the coffin.

'About a year'

'WHAT?!'

'I found him hurt in the park and he was so tiny and defenceless, I think the other bats were bullying him because of his size, so I just brought him home'

'And he made a nest in your hair' said Roger.

'I don't mind' Brian shrugged. Brian was getting sleepy. While it was fine for vampires to be awake during the daylight hours, the sun being up always made them lethargic. With Roger still on him, he moved around a bit to lay down properly.

'So John is sleeping?' he asked.

'Yes, and a made sure he won't wake up until sunset. I locked the living room, just in case. _Someone_ made a mess there and that _someone_ is going to have to clean it. I also locked Tim. I don't think he would walk around during daylight, but you never know'

'Great' said Brian sleepily. Roger yawned and stretched himself, somehow ending up laying on top of Brian's chest. Soon he was snoring softly. The guitarist didn't have the heart to move him. His heavy eyes closed and just went to sleep.

'Well this looks cosy' said Freddie delighted 'I think you will have the coffin all for yourself today, my dear'

He put Delilah on the floor and she left in a huff. Then he took off his robe and laid on top of the other two vampires, falling sleep almost right away.

 

/\oo/\

 

'Erm... guys?'

Brian couldn't move. He felt a weight in his legs and chest and a multitude of limbs that were clutching him and keeping him in place. There was a strange wetness in his neck.

'Guys?'

He opened one of his eyes a bit. He was in his room and everything was dark. Whatever was lying on top of him shuffled a bit, re-arranging their limbs, then continued sleeping. Someone was drooling in his neck. There was hair tickling his cheek and chin.

'GUYS!'

Brian opened his eyes and saw Johns face staring at him from above.

'JOHN!'

Brian suddenly sat up, pushing away the two bodies that had been peacefully using him as a mattress. Freddie stretched and stood up smiling.

'John! You are awake!'

Roger, on the other hand, just rolled to the floor and continued sleeping.

Conscious of the human standing there, Brian looked around. Three men sleeping in a coffin. That couldn't look normal. To make matter worse, Benny chose that moment to fly off Brian's hair and out the window.

'I know this looks odd, but I can explain!' exclaimed Brian standing up.

'No! You don't have to! Really, it's my fault. I shouldn't have just barged in.' answered a blushing John, eyes settling first on the two almost naked men in front of him, and then on the clothes that laid spread all over the floor. 'I'm sorry for interrupting. I'll... I'll wait in the kitchen, shall I?'

 

/\oo/\

 

When they entered the kitchen twenty minutes later, Freddie looking immaculate and with fresh makeup, Brian having brushed his hair and changed into cleaner clothes, Roger wearing his underwear and Freddie's robe, and still looking half-sleep, John was sitting at the table with a glass of water in front of him.

'I got myself some water. I hope you don't mind'

'Of course not dear! Take all you want'

They sat around the table looking at each other uncomfortably.

'Look, John, about what you saw...'

'No, Brian, let me say this.' he took a breath and clear this throat, like preparing for a well-rehearsed speech. He looked nervous 'I know you are keeping a secret from me, and I think I already know what it is. But I wanted you to know that I understand and that I would never judge you. If we are going to be bandmates, we should trust on one another. So, you know, everything is fine.'

'John, are you... are you sure? Maybe you think you know, but...' said Freddie

'No, really guys, you are just terrible at keeping secrets. I guessed it pretty much the same night I met you'

'And you came back? Weren't you afraid we would... you know, attack you or something like that?' asked Brian.

'Of course not! I would never think that! I know there is a lot of stigma with that, but people who think like that are assholes.'

'So, you are fine with it?' asked Roger.

'Completely' smiled John.

'This is such a relief! I can't believe it! We have been so worried trying to hide ourselves and acting normal, and you knew all along' exclaimed Freddie happily.

'And we thought we were doing such a good job! Well, it has been a while since we tried to pass as regular people' laughed Brian.

'And you know dear, if you ever want to join us and... become one of us, you'd be more than welcome' said Freddie patting John in the arm.

'Oh! Thanks, but I'm straight'

Roger frowned.

'You can be both' he said.

'I suppose so, but I'm fine for now.'

'Ok, but if you decide that you want to convert, try to do it when you are young. It's a lot harder when you are older.' said Freddie.

'I guess there's still a lot of ageism in your community' nodded John.

The three vampires looked at John confused but decided not to ask, they didn't want the human to think they were ignorant.

'Well, that's settled then' exclaimed Freddie loudly 'Now that there are no more secrets between us and we know that John doesn't mind being in a band with three vampires, it's time to move ahead with the band. When can we have our next band meeting?'

'I'm free next Friday and the weekend, but the rest.... WAIT WHAT?' said John.

'What?'

'Vampires?'

'Yes'

'Oh, it's a joke. Haha you got me!'

'Did I? I didn't realise I told a joke. Must have been a pun, they always go over my head.'

'No, I mean with the vampire thing.'

'Yes, we are vampires. I thought we have already established that'

'No, but... what?'

'I'm confused' said Roger.

'Me too' said Brian.

'Wait, you are saying that you are vampires? That's... that's impossible' said John.

'But you said you were fine with it!' exclaimed Freddie.

'What?! When?!'

'Literally, you minutes ago. You told us you were completely fine with it' said Brian

'That's because I thought you were gay! I didn't know you were vampires!' shouted the human starting to get desperate. 'Oh, my god! This makes a lot more sense! You only go out at night, there is no food or anything in the house, you have those teeth...'

'Hey!' said Freddie covering his mouth. His fans were bigger than the other's and they always made him feel self-conscious. John ignored him and continued enumerating.

'You dress weird, you are out-of-touch with technology, you have coffins for god sake! You have a bat as a pet!'

'Actually, that's just Brian' commented Roger, then frowned. 'Wait, you noticed all these things and you didn't realise we were vampires?'

'I thought you were hardcore goths! Who suffered from scurvy from the lack of sun!'

'Who used coffins?'

'Well, maybe you are very committed to the aesthetic. So the dream I had about the nightclub and the... the trolls... and all that. It wasn't just a dream?'

'You remember that?' asked Freddie shocked.'You weren't supposed to remember any of that'

'Oh, I wasn't supposed to remember, what a relief!' said John sarcastically.

'Maybe you are losing your touch' suggested Roger to Freddie.

John suddenly stood up.

'I... I need to leave'

'John, wait!' said Freddie, 'We are sorry we lied, but we promise nothing would have happened to you, we would have protected you no matter what. We already feel like you are part of the band, like you are part of our little family, and we would hate to see you go and never come back...'

Roger made a sound, but Brian quickly kicked him on the shin.

'So if you leave, please consider coming back. The position in the band, and as our friend, will remain open for you.'

'I'll... I'll think about it' he said and then he left, leaving two very sad vampires behind, and a third vampire that only felt moderately sad.

'He'll have to come back anyway' said Roger.

'Why?' asked Brian.

'He left his bass here' answered Roger pointed at the instrument that had been left behind, propped against the pantry door. 


	8. These guys can't get a break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John is in danger. Brian is a proper 18th Century gentleman. Roger wants to kill Freddie. Freddie reinvents sending nudes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, not beta at all.

John left the house in a daze. He was so confused, he didn't know how he felt. He couldn't believe vampires existed, and he would still think that it was all a prank if it wasn't for his memories of the night before, of the park and those creatures. And now he had to decide whether he accepted becoming part of a band with a bunch of lying vampires or if he was better off forgetting all about it. The choice wasn't as easy as he thought.

On the one hand, he could understand why they had lied. He guessed it wasn't something you could just spring onto a person. And the truth was that in the short time he had known them, the three men, vampires, had grown on him. He felt closer to them than to any other living thing he had known. Among them, he had felt comfortable, cared for and appreciated. They were weird, sure, but maybe so was he. And he had fitted so well in the band, their musical styles while not necessarily the same, matched perfectly. And maybe they would go on to do great things together, just so long as those things happened at night or in very dark places.

On the other hand, these creatures killed for a living. They lived in a dangerous world in which a human like him was just a target. Could he live being in constant danger? Was it fair for the other to have to protect him constantly? And whatever they had done to make him forget or whatever, the spell or something, that was beyond wrong. He felt violated and tricked. Was it the first time that they did it or had there been others that he just hadn't noticed. He had the feeling that entering this world, accepting becoming part of it even by association, would probably mean that he would have to leave the other behind. Maybe not right away, but in the long run? Just a few days knowing the vampires and so much had happened to him, he could only imagine what could happen if he continued hanging out with them. Was his family safe? His friends? Could he really trust them not to eat him?

A sudden noise took him out of his thoughts. The street was completely deserted. Abandoned houses surrounded him and, while there were some street lights here and there, it was the bright full moon the one lighting his path.

'Hello?' he called but received no answer. He shook his head and kept walking.

Then, there it was again, a creak in wood, the soft rustle of leaves and a barely audible whisper. John stopped again and looked around. Everything was dark and the strange shapes and shadows made him nervous. He thought he saw something move, but he couldn't be sure. Everything was so dark. He abruptly remembered what Roger had said the first time they met:

_'Well, you never know what kind of thing is lurking in the dark waiting to eat you'._

He had thought he was joking then, but now his words were tinted with a much darker meaning.

If vampires were real, and so were those creatures that attacked them in the park, what else could be lurking in the dark, watching and waiting for him to lower his guard to strike? He looked for his knife and found it, not in its usual place, but on the back pocket of his trousers. It had dark stains on it that he didn't care to inspect. He looked around again, but the street seemed as dim and deserted as before.

'Well?! COME ON YOU COWARDS' he shouted to the darkness, clutching the handle of his knife with a slightly shaking hand 'IF YOU ARE GOING TO ATTACK, THEN LET'S GET THIS OVER. I DON'T HAVE ALL NIGHT'

For a minute, nothing happened and John thought perhaps he had overreacted. He felt foolish. The events of these past nights must have gotten into his head. He was about to put the knife back in his pocket and continued walking when a piercing shriek broke the stillness of the night and four figures fell on him all at once.

 

  
/\oo/\

 

  
'Did you get rid of the body?' asked Brian, distaste pouring out of every word. He was cleaning bloodstains from the coffee table.

'Yeah, yeah, it's done.' answered Roger entering the living room and plunking himself on the sofa. 'You don't have to do that, you know?'

'Oh, I know. You should be the one doing it.' said Brian without looking up.

'No, I mean that is not necessary anymore. John knows about us. So if... ' Brian frowned' when... _WHEN_  he comes back, it doesn't matter if he sees it.'

'Roger, just because John knows doesn't mean we have to go back to living like pigs!' said Brian sharply and continued to clean with a maniacal look in his eyes.

'Brian?' said Roger 'Bri? BRI?!'

Brian stopped and looked up. His eyes were glassy and he was shaking slightly.

'Why don't you stop for a moment? Come sit here with me for a bit'

'But everything is a mess!' retorted the taller man.

'I know, I know' said Roger taking Brian's hand guiding him to the sofa and sitting close to him. 'When was the last time you ate?'

'Yesterday? No, we were looking for you yesterday. The day before, I think? Or before John came? I'm not sure.'

'Brian, you have to eat!'

'I know, it's just with so much going on I forgot'

Roger knew he was lying. Brian had never been good at the whole hunting and killing aspect of being a vampire and usually tried to avoid it as long as he could.

'Maybe, if you want, we can go out together, just the two of us, and I can get you something just for you' Roger said softly 'I wouldn't mind doing that whenever you forget... or you don't feel up to it, you know?'

'Oh' said Brian shyly 'I'd like that'.

'It's a date then' winked the blond drummer.

'Rog, you are such a good friend' exclaimed Brian hugging the shorter man.

'A friend, right' muttered Roger.  
  
Brian let go of him, but then took the blonde's hand in his own.

'No, you are right. You are more than just my friend, Roger' sighed Brian.

Roger held his breath and inched himself closer to the guitarist, eyes wide and shining.

'I am not?' he said, voice full of hope.

'Of course you are not! You should know you are not' answered Brian smiling. He cupped the drummer's face with his hand. 'Roger, you are my _BEST_ friend. My best friend in all the world'

'Oh' said Roger disappointed. 'Great, thanks I guess.'

'What's wrong? Are you still mad at me? Is it because of John? Or was I just too forward just now? I was, was I? I didn't mean to put you off, forget I said anything' said Brian quickly and stood up wanting to leave, to go to his room and sulk in his coffin for a bit. Being from the 18th Century, had made it difficult for Brian to express certain things, especially when those things pertained to his feelings for a certain blond friend of his.

'No,Bri, it's fine. I am honoured that you consider me your best friend.'

'Are you sure?' Brian sat back down again, but putting a little distance between them.

'Of course I'm sure! And don't tell Freddie, but you are my best friend too' Roger told him with a smile.

'Am I really? Oh, Rog I am so happy. I didn't think you returned my feelings' said the tall man grasping Roger's hands and peppering them with kisses. Roger blushed. 'And you are not still mad about John right?'

'I guess not. I am still not planning to become best friends with him or anything...'

'You'd better not!' said Brian with a smile.

'... but I guess I can accept him as part of the group. He's not so bad. I think I was mad because I was afraid you were going to replace me like you did Tim.'

'Oh, Rog, you know it's not the same. Tim was already old when we met him. But us? We are going to grow old and senile together as best friends do' said Brian reassuringly.

'You think so?'

'I know so' nodded Brian.

'I guess I was also a little bit, you know... I little bit... jealous of John' admitted Roger.

'Jealous? Why?'

'You and Freddie liked him so much. _YOU_ liked him so much, I was afraid you liked him more than you like me. And you have so much more in common with him!'

'Roger, listen to me. Yesterday when we couldn't find you, I almost went mad. I was desperate. I couldn't stand the fact that you might be gone and that I'd never told you about my feelings, you know? About you being my best friend. You mean the world to me.'

'God, Bri' whispered Roger. They had gotten close. Very close. Their mouths were mere inches apart and the blond vampire could feel some of Brian's curls tickling his face 'I need to tell you something'

'Yes?' asked Brian very softly. They got even closer. Lips almost touching.

'Bri, I lo...'

'DARLINGS LOOK AT THIS! I NEED YOUR OPINION!' Freddie barged into the living room holding a big canvas. He looked at his two friends. Roger was almost sitting on Brian's lap and they were holding hands. Brian looked embarrassed and guilty. Roger looked murderous.

'FREDDIE GOD DAMNIT, COULD YOU KNOCK FOR ONCE?!'

'Sorry, dear. Although, in my defence, this _IS_ the living room, not your boudoir. Brian, I expect this from Roger, but you? You little minx' smirked the older vampire.

'We... we were just talking, that's all' said Brian and moved away from Roger a bit, the younger vampire looked a bit hurt.

Freddie moved toward the sofa and flopped himself right in the middle of his two friends showing them the canvas he was holding.

'So, what do you think?'

Two pairs of eyes focused on the image in front of them. One pair looked away in embarrassment right away. The other pair frowned.

'Freddie, why are you showing us a naked painting of yourself?'

'Isn't it divine?' said Freddie proudly. 'I painted it myself. It was hard, considering I haven't seen my reflection in ages, so I had to work from memory. But I think it's a good likeness if I do say so myself.'

'The question is why are you exposing us to it? It's upsetting Brian.'

'No, no, I'm fine. It was just a shock at first. I didn't expect to see that much skin this early at night. It's a very nice painting, Fred.' assured Brian, Roger scowled.

'Well, I think you look like a harlot!' exclaimed Roger.

'Roger!' admonished Brian.

'No, he's right. That's what I was going for' said Freddie beaming. 'You see, with all that's happening with John, I realised that I couldn't rely solely on the band for my plan, so this is what I call plan B'

'Plan B?' asked Brian.

'Yes. If my plan to get Jim at the Unholy Masquerade doesn't work and he leaves for Ireland, I'm going to send him this to show him exactly what he is missing.' explained Freddie 'He won't be able to resist.'

'That the most stupid thing I've ever heard' stated Roger.

'Tim said it was a good idea' said Freddie defensively.

'You talked to Tim?' asked Brian. The older vampire had been very elusive lately.

'Yes, well, in truth I did all the talking. But he listened and his looks were very expressive' said Freddie. 'What do you think, Bri?'

Brian smiled carefully avoiding looking at the picture.

'I think you won't need it because Jim would be mad to reject you at the Masquerade' he told Freddie encouragingly.

'Well I think it's an insane idea.' pouted Roger. 'Sending naked pictures of yourself to someone who didn't ask for them is just plain wrong'

'Roger has a point' admitted Brian.

'But darlings, this is work of art!'

A loud noise interrupted the conversation, for which both Brian and Roger were grateful.

'It's coming from the window!' exclaimed Freddie. Roger stood up and opened it. A tiny bat entered the room and went straight to Brian.

'Benny!' the bat flew around the tall vampire shrieking, 'What's wrong?'

'What is he saying?' asked Freddie.

'How should I know? I don't speak bat.' answered Brian. 'I think he wants me to follow him outside?'

'Well, let's go!' Roger said.

The three vampires quickly turned into bats and followed Benny outside, to a spot just a couple of blocks from their house. There they transformed back.

'Is this it?' asked Roger.

'I don't see anything' said Brian. 'Wait! Look!'

The tiny bat went close to the floor and started shrieking again. The three vampires got closer.

'It's blood!' pointed out Roger 'And what's that?'

'A knife?' said Brian.

'That's... that's John's knife' said Freddie shocked.

'You're right! God, he must have been attacked!'

'Fred, I thought you had sent Delilah to follow him.'

'I did. This shouldn't have happened' said Freddie on the verge of tears. Brian also looked like he was about to cry.

'Look, we can't despair now. We have to remain clear-headed so we can find him.'

'What if it's too late?' asked Brian almost in a whisper.

'There is just a bit of blood. It's more likely that whoever took him just wanted to disarm him, so there is a good chance that he is still alive somewhere.'

'Roger is right' said Freddie, composing himself. 'We need to come up with a plan. Let's go back home, I don't like this place.'

The three vampires turned to bats again and flew away. Unbeknown to them, a dark figure followed their movements closely until they disappear in the night sky.


	9. The Bassist Vanishes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang investigates. Brian snaps. Roger is horny on main. And a famous cameo proves that Freddie is not the only cockblocker around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, not beta.

'So, who could have taken John?' asked Brian. He had a pad of paper and a pencil in front of him. They were all sitting down at the kitchen table. John's knife has been placed in the middle of it, the only real clue they had on the bassist's kidnapping. Benny had decided to stay with the vampires, nested in Brian's curly hair, only his little face visible to the others.

'I guess it's possible it was just some vampire looking for a meal.' suggested Freddie

'Around here? And on a Saturday night? When they could go and wait outside any club and get themselves a five-course meal? Easy pickings when they are so drunk they can barely walk' retorted Roger 'Not that I would do that, it's despicable' he added quickly, seeing the disgust in Brian's face.

'So you think they wanted to take John specifically?' asked Freddie 'That could narrow things down.'

'Yes. The question is, does John have any enemies? Somebody who would want to hurt him?' said Roger.

'Well, we don't know much about him. Although I can't really see John having any enemies.'

Roger snorted.

'You never know. We should go to his dorm room and see what we can find out. Maybe his roommate can be of help.' suggester Brian.

He took the pencil and under the heading 'JOHN'S ENEMIES' wrote 'Ask roommate'.

'I guess it wouldn't hurt' said Freddie doubtingly. 'But I think we are ignoring the obvious'

'What's that?' asked Brian

'That he was taken because of us! One of our jealous enemies found out about him and now they are using poor baby angel John to hurt us!

'Ok, so who have we offended lately?' Brian took the pencil in his mouth and started to chew on it lightly trying to think. Roger stared at him mesmerized. Freddie rolled his eyes impatiently and kicked Roger hard. The drummer yelped.

'Focus!' said Freddie firmly.

'I suppose Ray Forster is the obvious candidate' proposed Brian, oblivious.

'Maybe, but his territory is pretty far from here and it's not like they have a car to move around.'

'I'll add them just in case.' said Brian and under 'OUR ENEMIES' he wrote down 'Ray Foster and trolls'.

'Today it's the full moon! What about werewolves? There is that pack we always meet at Miami Sunset. Rog, you were pretty rude to them the last time we were there together.' said Freddie.

'They started it!' Roger defended himself.

'Did they?' asked Freddie.

'They spilt a drink on me!'

'Accidentally, and they apologized'

'They said excuse me, _madam_. Do I look like a Madam?'

Nobody answered.

'They are our natural enemies anyway. We should check them out just in case' pouted Roger.

Brian sighed and added 'werewolves' to the list.

'What about the gnomes? They can't be too happy about Freddie trying to snatch up Jim' suggested Roger.

'They wouldn't hurt a human' said Brian.

'They don't have the brains for it' said Freddie dismissively ' with the exception of my lovely Jim, they are a bunch of leaf-headed idiots'.

'I just don't think we have that many enemies' said Brian.

'That is preposterous! We are gorgeous, we are talented, we are absolutely superb. There is no chance there aren't scores of creatures just dying of envy because of us. Maybe we just haven't noticed them. MAYBE THEY ARE STALKERS TRYING TO GET OUT ATTENTION' exclaimed Freddie.

'Also we are pretty badass. Nobody dares to mess with us. They must be terrified. That's why they went for the weakest member of the band.'

Freddie nodded enthusiastically, Brian was less convinced.

'I... Well, I guess it could be.'

'It _must_ be.' assured Freddie.

'There's still another option we haven't considered. Someone else who might have it against us' said Brian hesitantly.

'And who's that?' asked Freddie. Behind him, Roger seemed to understand where the guitarist was going, his eyes opened wide and he started to shake his head vigorously. Brian ignored him.

'I mean, there is the... the Bea...'

'NO' said Freddie sharply.

'But Fred...'

'But nothing, we won't talk about it and that's it.'

The three vampires stayed silent for a minute.

'Well, we have some names. We still have some hours before sun-up, maybe we should go out and investigate, see if we can get more information.'

'Yes, good idea. Brian, you look like a nerd, you go to John's dorm room and see what you find. You will fit right in. Roger, you go to Miami sunset and see what's going on on the supernatural end. And I'll go see Jim. Maybe he knows something.'

'Wait, why would Jim know something?' asked Roger suspiciously.

'He is just so knowledgeable and strong' said Freddie dreamily 'I'm sure he can help us.'

'Fred, if we don't know what we are going against, maybe it's for the best to let Jim be for a while, or he may end up in as much danger as John.'

'I hadn't thought of that' he said miserably.

'Also, I don't think Miami has forgiven me for last time, so I'm not sure how welcome I would be at the club by myself' said Roger.

'Ok, so maybe Roger can come with me and Freddie can go to Miami's' Roger smiled triumphantly.

'Very well' said Freddie resigned 'But be quick about it and don't get sidetracked. This is no time for any tomfoolery, do you hear me?'

'We won't, don't worry Fred' Brian assured him.

'I wasn't talking to _you_ , darling. Did you hear me, Roger? STAY FOCUSED'

'I'm not a child! I have some self-control, for god's sake' he answered.

'I have yet to see proof of that. Brian, make sure he behaves' said Freddie and winked at the tall guitarist.

Brian just smiled softly but didn't say anything. He extended his arm towards his hair and retrieved the tiny bat from his comfortable sleeping place. The creature attached itself to Brian's hand and lovingly rub his head against the guitarist thin fingers.

'I'm afraid you are going to have to stay here, looking after the house. It's a very important job, but I know we can trust you' whispered Brian to the bat and then placed him on top of a cupboard.

'What about Delilah? Where do you think she is?' asked Roger.

'Oh, I don't worry about her. She's a fierce little thing. she can look after herself.' said Freddie, then looked down 'I don't suppose there is time to change...'

The other two vampires threw Freddie a look and the older vampire sighed.

'Needs must, then. I guess it's good I'm not seeing Jim today, I shudder to imagine what he would think if he saw me in this outfit.'

'Fred, Jim doesn't care what you wear. I think you could wear a potato sack and he would still like you' said Brian, walking to the door.

'Well, of course' answered Freddie, secretly pleased 'I'm such a divine and lush creature, I could make anything look like couture.'

The three vampires stood at the door.

'Shouldn't we let Tim know about this?' asked Roger.

'Better not bother him now, we can talk to him tomorrow night' answered Brian.

'So, we meet back here before sun-up. Be careful!' said Freddie walking away.

'You too!' said the other two and took the path in the opposite direction.

 

  
/\oo/\

 

  
John opened his eyes. Everything was dark around him. His head hurt and he couldn't move. Where was him? Memories suddenly came rushing into his mind, the band being vampires, walking back home, being attacked. He couldn't remember any faces, it had been dark and they had been too many and too fast.

After a minute, his eyes grew accustomed to the dark and he could make a little more sense of his surroundings. He was tied to a chair with what looked like a thick rope that secured his chest and hands, but his legs were free. The room was windowless, except for a tiny aperture too small for a human to go through. So the door was his only possible exit.

The place didn't look like the lair of some creature or a torture chamber, it looked like a regular basement. John tried to take an inventory of what he could see, what he could use to escape. There was a ladder in one corner. Against one of the walls, there was a table with many things on it and what looked like a toolbox. He could do a lot with that if only he could reach it.

He tried to move around, but the restrains didn't budge. He felt the rope burn his wrists in the effort. He tried his legs but they weren't long enough to reach the table. He was starting to grow desperate when he felt something moved against his legs.

'Hey!' he shouted starting to panic. Had they locked him with something hoping that it would eat him? His mind conjured horrific images of giant snakes, many-tentacled monsters, scaly claws seizing his legs and dragging him somewhere.

He was about to start kicking when he felt something rub against his hands. Something soft and fluffy. A soft purring noise could be heard.

A cat! he thought.

'Hello kittie, come here' he said softly and made kissy noises to attract the feline's attention.

The cat jumped onto his lap.

'Wait, I know you... Delilah?' The cat's purring intensified and bumped her head against John's forehead and then rubbed the man's cheek, just for good measure.

'How did you get here?'

Delilah looked at the small window.

'Wait, you can understand me? That's amazing!' exclaimed John.

Delilah just rolled her eyes. John smiled.

'I think I might have a plan to get us out of here.'

 

  
/\oo/\

 

  
Freddie arrived at Miami Sunset and went straight to Miami's table. The place was as full as it usually was, which meant that it wasn't full at all. Miami looked at him surprised.

'All alone? Where is the rest your merry band? Don't tell me lost them too?'

'No' said Freddie, sitting down next to the other man 'We ended up finding Roger at home, he had been there all along. He's with Brian now.'

'About time! Those two have been pinning for ages!' said Miami a took a sip from a glass in front of him. The liquid was thick and dark.

'Not like that! We lost John now, our new bassist, remember?'

'The human? I told you it would be dangerous to have him around.'

'He was taken and we are trying to find who did it. Brian and Roger have gone to his dorm room to see what they can find'

'And you came here to me to see what I can find' stated the man.

'If it's not too much bother' said Freddie with a smile.

'Well, why not? It's a slow night. Who are your suspects?'

'Well, Ray Foster comes to mind.'

'Yeah, I heard what happened in the park. But kidnapping? Not his style. He would have killed John and left him in your doorstep. Or some piece of him, anyway'

'Okay, g...glad to know'

'Who else?'

'Werewolves'

'It's full moon tonight'

'Yes, all the more reason...'

'Freddie, werewolves transform during the full moon. They lose all humanity, all coherent thought. How are they going to carry out a kidnapping like that? A dismemberment, maybe. All of John disappeared or did they leave any part behind?

'All of it!' exclaimed Freddie, horrified.

'Then it wasn't werewolves then.'

'Okay, how about a crazed-obsessed fan?'

'A fan of what?'

'Of us!'

'Us as in...?

'Our band. And also us personally. We are more than just our music, you know? We have a very broad appeal.'

'Freddie, the band has been dead for more than ten years, I don't think there are many fans left, let alone crazed-obsessed ones.'

'I'll have you know we have a very devoted fan base.'

'Well, a crazed fan would have reached out to you, especially if they wanted your attention. Did anybody reach out?'

'No... not _yet_!'

Miami just looked at Freddie and the vampire sighed.

'Okay, maybe it's not a fan.'

'What other suspect do you have?'

'That's it'

'Have you consider hunters?'

'Hunters?' asked Freddie confused.

' _Vampire_ hunters. There were a few sniffing around last week. Maybe they took your friend because they thought he would lead them to your nest.'

'We didn't think of that!' exclaimed Freddie.

'It's a possibility, although a far fetched one. Why would they be interested in you particularly when there are much bigger nests in town?'

Miami stood up.

'Stay put like a good little boy and I'll see what I can find out. Finish it if you like, it's safe for vampires I, think' he said indicating the glass he had been drinking from.

Freddie made a face.

'No, thank you. I know better than to drink a warlock's potion, god knows what's in it.'

'Rich coming from a bloodsucker, but suit yourself' said Miami and disappeared towards the back of the club.

 

  
/\oo/\

 

  
'I think it's this way' said Brian loudly. The halls of the big building were full of people partying, dancing, shouting and drinking (among other things that Brian preferred not to look too closely).

'What?' yelled Roger. The music was so loud he couldn't even hear the other vampire.

Brian just pointed and the blonde nodded and followed him. Soon, however, he had lost the tall man in the crowd.

'Brian! BRIAN!' he shouted. He tried to look for a mop of curly hair but saw none. The other vampire had disappeared.

Roger walked around for a bit. Could Brian had left him? He decided to go outside where there were fewer people. He slipped in the darkness like a shadow, he didn't want to call too much attention to himself. The side of the building was empty. He took out his cigarettes and lit one up. Suddenly, a loud voice boomed close to him.

'I told you to leave me alone!' a girl was walking fast, behind her a very drunk guy was following her.

'Come on, baby, don't be like that' he slurred.

'GO AWAY!' the girl shouted and quickened his step, but the guy was pretty fast and was about to catch up with her. Now, Roger didn't like to intervene in human affairs, because it could get ugly and then lead to questions, police, arrests and all that mess. But if there was something he liked even less was assholes.

'HEY, LEAVE HER ALONE!' shouted Roger.

The guy turned around to look at Roger and the girl took advantage of the distraction and made her escape. The guy seemed annoyed at first, but then looked at Roger up and down and a slow smile formed in his lips.

'Well, hello there gorgeous. What are you doing here all by yourself?' asked the man.

'None of your damn business' growled Roger, but the man seemed unconcerned by his rudeness.

'How about we keep each other company for a while, baby? A pretty girl like you, in a dark place like this? It's just not safe' the guy came closer to Roger.

' _WHAT_?'

'Come on, give us a kiss' the drunk guy threw himself at Roger.

The vampire just about to give the drunk bastard the beating he deserved, when a flash went before him and suddenly, the guy was no longer there.

He heard a growl to the side and when he turned he saw something that he had never seen in his very long, very colourful life: Brian, sweet, calm, peace-loving Brian, had the guy pinned against a wall, one hand on his throat the other, against his chest. His fangs were bared and his eyes red with fury. It was, in all honesty, the hottest thing Roger had ever seen.

'Hey man! Sorry, is she your girl? We were just talking, friendly like. A piece of ass like that, you can blame a man for trying' the guy sounded scared.

'Stay away from him' snarled Brian in a low voice, but the guy was barely listening to him.

'Please! It isn't like she was exactly complaining if you know what I mean. You her boyfriend or something?'

'No, I am his _best friend_ ' and with that Brian sunk his teeth on the guy's neck. In a few minutes, the body fell dead on the floor, completely empty. Brian kicked him behind some bushes, then turned around.

Brian's hair was tussled, cheeks flushed, the top buttons of his shirt were open and showing his chest, there some blood still dripping from his mouth and there was a wild look on his eyes. He looked like the hero of a romantic novel and Roger was just about to rip his clothes and throw himself into his arms, when suddenly, his expression changed from unrestrained to horrified. He looked down at himself and then at Roger.

'Rog... Are... Are you ok?'

'Of course I am! Although you know you didn't really have to do that, I could have beat him easily.'

'Oh, I know. It's just... I was so hungry and then I saw him being awful to you and... I don't know, I guess I just saw red. God, I'm so embarrassed! I'm so sorry you had to see that' Brian said urgently.

Roger walked to him and grabbed his shoulders.

'Bri, are you kidding? That was the single most amazing thing I've seen! It was so hot!'

'It... it was?'

'Fuck, yes! You know you need to let go like that more often, you are too repressed'

'I guess, I just don't really like the... you know' he made a vague gesture with his hand, but Roger understood.

'Well, it's just a matter of finding another asshole. Don't worry, there are plenty around.' Roger smiled then took his hand from the taller vampire's shoulder and wiped his face 'Sorry, you have a bit of blood'

Brian followed Roger's fingers as they left his face and went into the other man's mouth. The drummer licked his fingers clean then smirked.

'He tasted pretty good for being such a bastard'

'Y...yeah' said Brian smiling, then he cupped the blonde's face.

'Rog...'

'Bri...'

They closed their eyes and the distance between them became nonexistent.

'POLICE STOP'

A bright light shone on them and they sprang apart. A short red-headed policeman walked towards them and eyed them suspiciously.

'We had a report about some disturbances around here, some wild dogs chasing and attacking people. You two haven't seen anything... strange around have you?'

Roger looked nervously towards the bush where Brian had kicked the body, but it was completely hidden.

'No, nothing strange' he answered.

'Well, now that you mention it, there were some strange noises a while ago' said Brian, then glanced at Roger pointedly.

'Oh right, yeah, some howling and the like'

'Lee, we have a lead' said the policeman into his radio.

'Copy Mazzello. What's your location?' a voice answered.

'Turn around'

Around twenty yards from where they were, a very tall figure turned around. The red-headed policeman raised one arm and made a signal. The other man reciprocated the signal and then came jogging to join his partner.

'What's all this then?' he asked, slightly out of breath, looking at the two men with interest.

'They said they heard _howling_ '

' _Howling_? Where?'

'From the woods over there' pointed Roger.

'Right. The werew... ' the red-headed police officer coughed at his partner 'I mean, there were dogs, obviously, there were wild dogs. No need to panic'

'We weren't panicking' said Brian.

'Good.' the tall police officer said.

'Great' replied Roger.

'We have it under control' added the red-headed police officer.

'We believe you' assured Brian.

'Excellent' added the tall police-officer.

They all looked at each other for a moment.

'Well, thank you for your help. Now go back to your rooms before we arrest you two lovebirds for public indecency'

Roger opened his mouth to complain but Brian just grabbed his hand and started to walk towards the building.

'Of course, officer, thank you. Good night.'

'Night' said the tall officer cheerfully waving his hand.

The two officers started to walk towards the wood, their voices fading in the night.

'Maybe we should call sergeant Malek for reinforcements?'

'Let's see what we find first. Maybe it IS a pack of wild dogs.'

Once back inside, the two vampires stopped for a moment. Brian looked worried, but Roger started giggling.

'That was close' said Brian. 'Do you think there are werewolves in that wood?'

'Probably' answered Roger

'I hope nothing happens to them' said Brian miserably 'God, it's so late! Freddie is going to kill us. We haven't found out anything yet!'

'Oh, right' said Roger just then remembering why they were there.

'Let's go! And don't let go of my hand. I don't want to lose you again'

'Whatever you say' said Roger smiling. And the two vampires disappeared in the crowd.

 

  
/\oo/\

 

  
'Well, I have good news and I have bad news' said Miami returning to the table.

Freddie looked up. He had been using this time to do his nails. He never left the house without his nail kit.

'What's the good news?' he asked.

'There are no hunters after your gang'

'Great! What are the bad?'

'There are no hunters after your gang.'

'Oh'

'Yes, so we still don't know who's behind your bassist's kidnapping.'

'I just don't understand, why would anyone be interested in taking John?' asked Freddie.

'Now that is a good question' said Miami 'If I were a detective, the first thing I would look into is who gains something from his disappearance...'

'But that's ridiculous, there is nothing to gain for it.'

'Or who lost something in his appearance...'

'Well, that just doesn't make any sens... Oh' Freddie stopped suddenly 'But he wouldn't, I mean he is... He can't...'

The vampire suddenly stood up.

'I have to go now. Thanks for your help!' he shouted as he ran to the door.

He couldn't waste a single moment. He needed to go home right now. _Everyone_ was in danger.

 

 


	10. A prince, a scientists and a street urchin walk into a basement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will the vampires be safe? Will John survive? Will they ever actually make any music?

Freddie flew over the city lights. The sun wasn't up yet, but he could feel it slowly rising far in the horizon. He had at least one more hour of darkness left and he prayed it would be enough.

Usually, he hated flying in his own form: he invariably ended up with his hair in a mess and a few bugs lodged in his throat. But it was the fastest way he had to reach the house. His thoughts kept coming back to his friends, to sweet Brian and feisty Roger, and to poor innocent John, who they have gotten involved in all this mess. If something were to happen to him... But no, Freddie couldn't think of that. Maybe he was wrong, maybe he would arrive home and everything would be fine, Brian and Roger would be making googly eyes at each other, and he would tease them and then Brian would blush and Roger would tell him to fuck off and Tim would... But no, he knew deep down that he was right.

He landed in the garden as silently as he could and he coughed a few times. There was a faded yellow glimmer on the horizon. The lights of the house were on, but everything was silent and still. He had never realised how noisy living with the other vampires had been until that noise was no more, and the quiet house now seemed unnatural. He entered it and moved from room to room soundlessly, checking for his friends. There was no one. And yet, he had seen Roger's jacket laying by the door, the same jacket that he had been wearing when he left the house earlier in the evening.

There was only one room left to check: the basement.

Freddie considered briefly if he should try to find some kind of weapon, but he knew it would be useless. If his suspicions were true, then there was no weapon that he could use.

He took a deep breath and descended the stairs that lead to the basement. The only light came from a single lightbulb in the middle of the room. His eyes took a second to adjust to it, but right away he saw them: Brian and Roger were standing together shackled to the wall and gagged. He ran to them and ripped the gags off.

'Freddie, no! You need to...' said Brian, but a raspy sound interrupted him, a voice they have long forgotten.

'Well, isn't this nice? All us _friends_  together'

Freddie turned around. Tim stood in front of him. Unlike the other vampires, who could easily pass as humans, in looks at least, Tim had become more and more inhuman with the passing years: he had lost all of his hair, his eyes had become white and dead, his ears were now pointy and long, his skin was ashy and dry, and his teeth sharp and protruding out of his mouth. He looked like a walking corpse, like a monster from a nightmare.

'You sick bastard!' shouted Freddie. He felt his body hit the wall and starting to become paralyzed. The older vampire had powers that were beyond theirs and made greater by the fact that he was their progenitor, the one who had converted them.

'Now, now, Fred. There is no need for shouting. After all, we are _family_  aren't we?' the older vampire came close to the singer and caressed his cheek with his grey scaly hand. 'To think that I had such high hopes for you. What a waste that you all have to die now...'

'Look, I'm sorry we replaced you in the band, but don't punish John because of it, it wasn't his fault. Please, let him go...wherever he is' begged Freddie.

Tim just laughed.

'It's funny that you presume you are in any kind of position to make requests. And you think this is about your little human? I don't care about that. Well, I don't care about it much. The truth is, boys, that I have been planning to leave the band from some time'

'WHAT?!' shouted Roger, eyes enraged.

'My loyal Rog' said Tim moving in front of Roger. 'I'm sorry to say that it's true. We were going nowhere. It was time to move on. Nothing personal'

'NOTHING PERSONAL?! YOU WERE OUR FRIEND, YOU BLOODY TRAITOR!'

'Oh, don't be like that. It truly pained me. After all, I built this band from the ground up. It took me years to find you, century after century just to handpick the right members to create perfection: a medieval Persian prince, a lonely Regency scientist and a Victorian street urchin. Who could have predicted that such a strange mix could create something so splendid? We had such potential! But what did you do with it?' Tim grabbed Roger by the chin and growled 'You squandered it! You pursue fucking _garden gnomes_ , you _pine_  for each other, you _knit_ , you compose _love_  songs, you _save_  small animals, you _care_  so much. You are vampires! You are killers! You are supposed to be determined and ruthless! You are an embarrassment to your kind!'

Tim step back and closed his eyes. He was shaking with fury. After a moment, he continued.

'But well, c'est la vie. _That_  is not why you need to die, though. Originally, I had planned to just leave. After all, I didn't mind if you wanted to keep going with... whatever it is you were doing' he said with distaste 'But then... _But then_  you bring the band back together and I hear you play with this... this _mortal_. And what I heard was _magnificent_. You never played like that with _me_. I couldn't stand it.'

'Wait, so you are going to kill us because we are better off without you?'

'Yes. In a way. We are a small community, my dears. Opportunities for gigs, for tours, for albums, they are rare for creatures of the night like us. There just simply can't be two vampire bands. I'm sorry, but there can't.'

'So you are going to kill us just because you want to ease the way for your new band?'

'Of course. You forget, my dears. Unlike you, I _am_  a determined and ruthless vampire. And you are standing in the way of something I want.'

'So why take John? Why not just kill us and be done with it?' asked Freddie.

'Divide and conquer, isn't that what they say? Three vampires against one is not a chance I was willing to take, even considering my superior powers and your uselessness. I chose to be safe, so I needed a distraction that would pull you apart. I had hoped to have to deal with you one by one, but some pairs proved a little difficult to separate' said Tim looking at Brian and Roger with dislike. 'In the end, it matters not. Although I have to admit that I did have a _little_  help to ensure your collaboration'

The older vampire retrieved something from his tonic and Brian emitted a strangled cry, from the vampire's hand two tiny eyes stared at them.

'Benny! No!' cried Brian.

'Ah, Benjamin. He didn't want to do it, he has grown fond of you, Brian. But he didn't have any other option since only I hold the key to bring him back to his human form. He doesn't have any choice but to obey. That's why I sent him to you. I knew he wouldn't disappoint me. '

'He is human?'

'In a way. A witch's familiar trapped in his animal form.'

'Poor thing' whispered Brian under his breath, tears streaming through his face. 'Then I'm happy he will at least gain his freedom from all this.'

'Argh, so disgustingly noble.' said the older vampire, rolling his eyes.

'And what about John? Will you let him live?' asked Freddie.

'I could, but I have to convert my new bandmates, and new vampires are always so hungry...' said Tim with a sharp smile.

'Well I guess you will have to be ordering take out' a voice said from the stairs and suddenly John was there.

'JOHN!' said Freddie, Brian and Roger at unison.

'YOU!' said Tim, voice filled with venom 'How did you escape?'

'I'm a mechanical engineer major and I have been watching the Home Alone movies twice a year for the past fifteen years. I have a few aces under my sleeve. Also, your goons are idiots.'

'Very well, I guess I'll have to do the job and kill you myself.'

'Sure, you can do that. Then again you could have killed _them_  yourself, and yet they're still alive and you just spent the last half an hour monologuing like a Bond villain. So, before you start another speech, let me propose something different: how about you consider starting a new band with me?'

'What?!' exclaimed Freddie.

'John, no! You too?' cried Brian.

'You little shit! I knew you were trouble!' shouted Roger.

John ignored them, looked around the room and then went to stand in the middle of it.

'I mean, it was fun playing with them, but I need more than fun. I want someone who takes things seriously, someone powerful who can protect me. How can they do that when they can't even protect themselves?' he asked.

'You make a good point' said Tim smiling, getting closer. 'What about the others? The ones that took you, what happened to them?'

'Dead' said John 'As soon as I spoke to them and they told me what you were planning I knew that I could offer you something better than Humpy Bong, so I got rid of them'

'Humpy Bong? Are you joking?!' roared Roger indignantly.

'Dead, eh? I like your style' said Tim, ignoring Roger.

'So, do we have a deal?' asked John.

'We do' answered Tim 'on one condition.'

'Which is?'

'Kill them. Show me your loyalty'

'What? Now?'

'No time like the present' said the older vampire and produced a sharp dagger from his tunic.

Roger walked to him slowly and took the dagger.

'Start with Brian, I want Roger to see that. But leave Freddie to me '

John walked up to Brian and Roger started to struggle, trying to reach for his friend, to get free, anything. But to no avail, he couldn't move.

'You son of a bitch! I'm going to kill you if you touch him!'

John rose the dagger to Brian's neck.

'Remember, you have to separate the head completely. Vampires don't die as easy as humans' said Tim smiling.

John looked up, there was a row of small paint-darkened windows on the wall above them. Then he looked back at where Tim was standing.

'Are you going to convert me after this? Make me a vampire?'

'Of course, dear. No offence, but you are quite useless to me as a human. So needy and fragile,'

'That's what I thought' said John 'Sorry for this'

At once, several things happened. Benny flew from Tim's side and tried to attack John. John dodged him and buried the dagger in Tim's chest, pushing him to the middle of the room. The vampire laughed.

'You little traitor. I should have known. But I'm sorry to tell you this won't kill me.' he said.

'No, but this will' and he pushed the vampire to the centre of the room and shouted 'NOW!'

Suddenly one of the windows was smashed, a shaft of sunlight invaded the dark room and hit Tim in the middle of the chess. Flames engulfed him and, in a second, his body was reduced to ash.

It was over.

They stared at the pile of dust that had just been Tim a minute ago. The break in the windowpane was covered and the room was set in darkness once again. Freddie broke the silence, moving slowly, recovering from Tim's magic.

'So it was all a trick? You didn't mean any of what you say?'

John laughed.

'What? About me joining him? Of course not! I would never do that' he went to release the other two from the chains.

'That was amazing!' said Brian hugging him after he was set free. 'Thank you for saving us.'

When Roger was released, however, he didn't thank John. He pushed him away and run towards what was left of Tim. He knelt down next to it, tears falling.

Freddie walked to him and placed his hand on the blonde's shoulder.

'He was a bastard, I know that. But he was also my friend. And he was the first person to believe in me. He SAVED me, you know, back then' sobbed the drummer.

'He didn't deserve your love nor your loyalty, Rog.' said Freddie.

Brian went to kneel down next to his best friend and hugged him.

'Come on, Rog. It's daylight already and you need to rest. You can stay with me in my coffin for tonight if you want.'

'Really? You mean it?' asked Roger hopefully, drying his face with his sleeve.

'Of course, just don't drool on me this time.'

They stood up again, still holding each other.

'Just to sleep, mind you' warned Freddie smirking 'No funny business'

'Fuck off!' said Roger burying his face in the taller man's hair. Brian just blushed.

All was well in the world, thought Freddie.

'So, did you really kill Humpy Bong?' asked Brian.

'My god, no! I just left them tied up and called the police. Delilah stayed with them to make sure they behaved. They were terrified of her.'

'Wait, if Delilah stayed with them who broke the window?' asked Freddie

'Well, I knew I needed some reinforcements and I remembered the other night in the park. So I went back there to see if I could find...'

'JIM!' exclaimed Freddie excitedly.

As if summoned, Jim climbed down the stairs and smiled.

'Everything went well I see. Nice bit of planning, John. Very clever' Then he looked at Freddie 'Freddie are you ok? I was worried' he said a little embarrassed.

'Oh, Jim' he said and flung himself into the gnomes arms 'Were you really worried?'

'Of course. I'm very happy that you are fine.'

'My hero' said the singer, and buried himself in the gnome's chest 'I'm sorry darling, I'm just so weak I can barely stand. Must be the sunlight'

'Sure, the sunlight...' muttered Roger.

'You need to lay down, Freddie. Let me carry you to your room' said Jim and took Freddie in his arms like a groom carrying his bride.

'Thank you, Jim. You are so strong' he said softly. Both men disappeared up the stairs.

'Well' said John 'I guess you don't need me to carry you?' he asked smiling.

'No, don't worry. We will manage on our own somehow.' answered Roger.

'What about him?' John asked pointing at the tiny bat huddled in the corner.

'Oh, Benny!' said Brian. He went to him and picked him up. The little bat was trembling. 'Don't worry, I'm not mad at you.'

'I am' said Roger, frowning.

'Well, I'm not. It must be awful being trapped like that. I understand why you did it and I forgive you. And you were so brave when you tried to defend me! I promise you, I'll find a way to transform you back.'

The little bat rubbed his face in Brian's fingers and the man smiled.

'I love you too' he whispered. 'Now let's go to sleep. It was a long night'

'You are not bringing him to the coffin! I don't trust him!'

'Roger!'

'Don't Roger me, we almost died because of him'

'We almost died because Tim wanted to kill us. Is this really because you found out that Benny is actually a man?' asked Brian, narrowing his eyes.

'No' answered Roger unconvincingly.

'Maybe it's best if you give him some space. But don't worry, he'll get over it.' assured Brian to the bat, who was glaring at Roger, and gave him a kiss. Roger growled.

'You can stay with me, little guy' said John.

'You are staying here them?' asked Brian hopefully.

'Yes, if you don't mind. I don't think I have any other choice really. I don't know what may happen to you guys if I'm not around' he smiled.

Once they climbed the stairs, Brian gave Benny to John and then gave the bassists a hug. Roger punched him in the arm in a friendly way and disappeared with Brian into one of the rooms.

John went to the sofa in the music room. He placed Benny softly on one of the pillows, then laid down himself. In a second, he was sleep and in peace. He felt like he was finally home.


	11. Now what?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One evil has been defeated, but is that really the end of their troubles?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Name of the fic officially changed! I was tired of the other one.

The alarm clock started beeping. Six o'clock. Brian opened his eyes sleepily. He felt Roger's dead weight on him. There was some wet patches on his neck and collarbone as well as a little sting. Roger must have nibbled at him during the day. He tried to extricate his arm to turn the alarm off, but Roger's body was attached to him like a tick and he couldn't move.

'Rog' he said softly 'come on, it's night time. Time to wake up.'

Roger just mumbled and turned his face away. Brian shook him.

'Rog' he said louder. 'Wake up'

Roger moved his arm and a hand landed on Brian's face covering his mouth.

'Sl'pn' Roger grumbled.

Brian bit on Roger's hand and the drummer yelped and opened his eyes.

'Hey! Rude'

'Tough' smiled Brian.

'What's that noise?' he moved to hit the alarm clock once and the noise stopped. 'Much better' he said and snuggled again against Brian.

'Roger'

'It's too early' grumbled the blonde.

'Fine, you can stay a few more minutes, but I have to get up. There is a lot to do.'

Roger smiled and kissed Brian on the cheek.

'Thanks, babe' he said and turned around to go back to sleep.

Blushing, Brian stood up. He stretched feeling his stiff muscles creek. His hand went to his hair, and then he remembered that Benny had not stayed with him.

'Just an extra half an hour and that's it. Are you listening, Roger?' But all the response he got was a loud snore that may or may not had been faked.

Resigned, Brian sighed and put on his waistcoat and coat. He went to the music room, but it was empty. The sofa looked like it had been slept on, but the person who had done the sleeping was nowhere to be found. The tall vampire took his acoustic guitar and moved on to the kitchen. He sat down and started to pluck the strings, working on a melody that had popped into his head a few days ago.

Suddenly, he heard the front door open and closing. Freddie entered the kitchen a second later. Uncharectiscally, he was still wearing the same clothes as the night before.

'Good night, darling!' he exclaimed, kissing the other vampire on the cheek and then taking a sit in front of him.

'You are in a good mood,' said Brian suspiciously 'where were you?'

'You know, outside, in the garden.'

'Outside? You hate being outside. And we don't have a garden, we have a collection of weeds and dead plants because neither of you ever wants to help me fix it.'

'Well, it's fixed now!' said Freddie happily.

'What?' Brian stood up, went to the front door and opened it.

What used to be a dead wasteland of dirt and mud was now covered with lush green grass. Even the trees that had been lanky and overgrown, were now shapely and refreshed. The fresh patches of earth where they had buried some bodies were now gone, covered by beautiful flowerbeds of yellow daisies and freesias. Even the vines that had been invading a good portion of one side of the garden were now neat and contained.

'How did this happened?' asked Brian in awe.

'Jim' answered Freddie. 'He spent the day here just in case we had more trouble and he got bored, so he fixed our garden. Isn't it great? And with all my favourites too! He's just left. He needed to meet with his brethren or something.'

'It's beautiful' said Brian 'We should get him to stay more often'

'That's the idea!' laughed Freddie and winked at the tall vampire.

Suddenly, a small figure appeared in the garden walking leisurely, bright shiny eyes focused on Freddie.

'Delilah! My love!' exclaimed the singer and scooped the cat up, holding her close to his chest.'

Delilah started purring. Her expression, as much as anyone can really decipher a cat's expression, seemed satisfied.

'John told me how good you did and how much you helped him. I didn't expect anything less, of course, you being such a clever girl' cooed Freddie. 'And did you see the garden? Dear Jim did it for us! Go and inspect it, see if you can catch something tasty.'

He deposited her in the ground and with one last head bump from her and one last kiss from him, the cat went into the garden and started to sniff around.

When Brian and Freddie got back to the kitchen, Roger was already there, going through a knitting magazine. He was wearing an oversized ruffled shirt and trousers that were obviously too long for him and that he had had to roll up his legs.

'Roggy, what the hell are you wearing darling?' exclaimed Freddie when he saw him, laughing at the short man.

'Are those... are those my clothes?'

'Yeah, I needed to change and I couldn't find anything of mine. You don't mind, do you?' answered Roger grinning.

'N No, of course not. You... You look nice' smiled Brian shyly.

'He must REALLY love you because, believe me, you look absolutely ridiculous.'

Before Roger could come up with a retort, they heard the front door and then John came into the kitchen. He was carrying a backpack and several shopping bags.

'Hello,' he said cheerfully. 'I woke up famished and there was nothing here, so I went shopping. I bought some things to leave here for... you know... the future. If that's ok with you?'

'Of course!' exclaimed Freddie 'Does that mean you are definitely accepting to be part of the band?'

'Yeah... if you'll have me' answered John shyly.

'As if we wouldn't!' said Freddie.

'We could never hope to find anyone better' agreed Brian warmly.

'I'm already looking for a pattern to knit you a sweater' announced Roger 'I hope you like green, orange and purple because that's the only colours I have left.'

'Uhrm... I'm sure it's going to be great' smiled the bassist choking up a little.

He started to put away the food and other things he had bought when he felt two arms hugging him from behind.

'John' came Freddie's voice 'sorry I was... distracted yesterday. But I'm really thankful for your rescue last night. You were so brave. And we appreciated so much that you decided to stay.'

'Thanks, Freddie' he said turning around and giving in to the full hug. 'Nobody has ever called me brave before. And I don't really think I ever felt that way until I met you guys.'

'Hey, none of that! It's too early to get this soppy' shouted Roger.

John laughed, let go of Freddie and turned around quickly trying to hide the wetness in his eyes. The singer understood that the younger man needed some space, so he went to sit with Roger to help him choose a sweater pattern for John, while the bassist started to make himself something to eat.

Brian was going to pick his guitar again when something came through the window.

'Benny!' he exclaimed happily.

Benny flew into the kitchen with a huge cricket in his mouth. He went straight to Brian. Roger rolled the magazine he was reading and tried to shoo him away with it, but Brian intervened.

'Roger!' he said, taking the tiny bat out of harm's way. 'You're gonna hurt him!'

'Well, I don't trust him'

'But look at his little face! His little paws! His little ears!' said Brian, then addressed the bat himself 'Did you catch that all by yourself? Aren't you a clever boy!' and he petted Benny as he ate.

'He is not a boy! He is a literal demon, Brian! You are talking to a grown-ass demon as if it were a baby!' raged Roger.

'Oh, hush. I know he is not really a bat but look how little he is, how helpless.' said Brian cooing to the bat.

'May I also add that we don't know _why_  he is that way. _Maybe_  he did something to deserve this punishment.'

'Roger has a point there.' said Freddie.

'Freddie!' exclaimed Brian betrayed. Roger looked smug. 

'Well, he does. We don't know anything about him. He might have done something horrible!'

'Or he might have not! What we _do_  know is that he tried to save me last night when he thought John was going to hurt me, even when it destroyed his chances of Tim making him human again. He can't be too terrible if he is willing to do _that_ '

'I think Brian is right' said John, eating cheese on toast with relish. 'In any case, we won't know unless we transform him back and hear what he has to say.'

'Well, I'm not really an expert on this sort of magic, but Tim had books downstairs and he might have learnt about familiars from them. It wouldn't hurt to check.'

'Great idea' said Brian. Benny had finished eating and had crawled into Brian's curls, his little head popping outside his nest of hair 'Did you hear Benny? We are going to help you!'

The little bat made a happy sound and muzzled Brian's curls. Roger frowned.

'Well, I don't like it' he glared at Benny, Benny looked back at him matching his venom.

'Duly noted' said Freddie 'Now that this business has been dealt with, I think it's a good moment to have a band meeting. Remember the band? We are not just here to hang out! The Unholy Masquerade is getting closer and we have nothing to show for ourselves.'

'Sorry, but what is the Unholy Masquerade?' asked John.

'Just _the_  event of the season!' said Freddie enthusiastically.

'Once a year, all the dark creatures of the country get together and organize this party, it's pretty big in our community. Everyone who is everyone in the supernatural world attends. And every year there is a talent show. The winners of the talent show get a pretty big break on the scene, the possibility of an album, of tours, of concerts.' explained Brian

'Wow, have you participated before?'

'We used to participate pretty often with Tim,' answered Roger 'and the last time we did, ten years ago, we actually got pretty close to winning, but then...'

'But then we lost and that's all there is to it' interrupted Freddie. John eyed him suspiciously but said nothing. 'Now, however, I feel we have a real chance. First of all, we need to start practising regularly. We need to get used to each other.'

'I'll create a practice schedule' offered Brian.

'Excellent' said Freddie 'We also need new material. The rebirth of our band requires new music. I propose each of us try to come up with a new song for the next band meeting, shall we say in a week's time?'

'Urm, I've never actually composed a song' said John a little embarrassed.

'Don't worry darling, you don't have to bring the whole thing. Just think about some nice lyrics or a catchy tune. We'll work on the rest together.' reassured Freddie.

'Oh, ok' said the bassist relieved.

'Any other questions?'

'Uhrm, silly to ask, but is the Masquerade going to be safe for me? You know... being human.'

The three vampires shared a look.

'Sure' answered Roger.

'We'll make it safe' promised Brian.

'Have you had any thoughts of converting? That would make things easier' asked Freddie.

'Converting?'

'Yeah, to a vampire. It would be so much fun! You can come to live here with us and we could get you a coffin and everything. You'd love it!' proposed Freddie.

'I... I don't know if I ready for that. Don't you think I am a bit too young?'

'Nonsense! I was your age when I converted' smiled Freddie.

'Freddie, you were nowhere near his...' interrupted Roger.

'Just a poor lad....'

'You were a literal prince.'

'Looking for my place in the world...'

'You wanted to escape from an arranged marriage.'

'And I happened to run into Tim who found me completely irresistible...'

'You went looking for him because you wanted to live forever and he only converted you when he heard you sing.'

'Well... however it happened. And it happened so long ago, who can even remember such things?' Freddie threw a dirty look at Roger, who continued reading his magazine innocently, and then smiled at John 'What's important is that I am very happy now.'

'I know, I just need time to think.'

'We won't pressure you. It's your decision' said Brian patting John's arm.

All of the sudden, there was a knock on the front door. The three vampires looked at each other trying to understand what was happening.

'I think there is someone at the door?' said John.

'Yes' said Freddie.

'That never happens' comments Roger.

'Aren't you going to see who?' asked John.

'I suppose we should?' said Brian.

'We could just ignore it' suggested Roger.

'I like that idea' agreed Freddie.

There was another knock, this time louder.

'I don't think they are going to give up.' commented John.

'So maybe we should just... answer?' proposed Freddie.

The other vampires nodded uncertainly and, in unison, all three went together to the door. John followed behind highly amused.

When they opened the door two police officers were facing them. Both groups looked at each other with suspicion.

'Haven't we seen you before somewhere?' asked the short red-headed one.

'No' answered Freddie.

'Yeah!' said the taller one 'Last night! When we were chasing the were... the wild dogs! You two were in the university campus snog...'

'What can we do for you, officers?' asked Brian, quickly interrupting.

Freddie raised an eyebrow, Roger muttered darkly 'We would have been if you hadn't interrupted us'

'We are officers Lee and Mazzello. We are investigating a series of disappearances that have occurred in this neighbourhood. May we come in?'

'S...Sure' said Brian. 'Living room?'

Freddie nodded and Brian guided the officers to the living room.

'Oh, wait we never finished cleaning the...' exclaimed Roger, but too late. The police officers were in the living room looking at a couch and chairs covered in blood. There was also spatters of blood on the walls and curtains.

'....blood' finished Roger.

'What in the name of God happened here?!' the red-headed officer said. He was just reaching for his radio when John intervened.

'Roger is a haemophiliac!' he shouted.

'What?' the tall officer said.

Quick on the uptake, Freddie put his hands on the police officers' and look straight into their eyes, difficult considering there were two pairs of them.

'Roger is a haemophiliac' he said, slow and clear 'He had a little accident the other night, but he is alright now. There is nothing suspicious about it.'

The expression on the tall officer's face softened immediately.

'A haemophiliac, eh? Well, that explains it. But you should be more careful, mate. Losing that much blood can't be good for you.' He told Roger.

'Right, no. I'm fine now. Thanks though' he answered quickly.

The red-headed officer still looked suspicious but said nothing.

'Have about we take a sit?' said Brian.

Both police officers sat on the sofa gingerly and Brian sat next to them. Freddie sat in front of the sofa, not taking his eyes from the two men. John and Roger took the chairs at the sides.

'So, you were saying about your investigation?' asked Brian.

'Officer Lee and I have uncovered a series of disappearances, all of them happened on this very neighbourhood, some dating several years ago' said Officer Mazzello taking his little notebook out. Officer Lee nodded in support.

'That's awful' said Freddie. 'But what does that have anything to do with us? We are four perfectly human abiding citizens.

'Law-abiding' whispered John.

'Law-abiding humans' corrected Freddie.

'I don't doubt it' said Mazzello, clearly doubting it 'but your house happens to be the only one inhabited in the whole neighbourhood.'

'Well, what do you now?' said Roger 'Wasn't I just saying how peaceful this neighbourhood was? Wasn't I?'

'Yes' the other three answered.

'Well, no wonder.' nodded Roger.

'Quite' said Mazzello dryly.

'What we were thinking,' continued Officer Lee 'is that maybe you have _observed_  something odd around this place, something out of the ordinary? You know, being that you are the _only ones_  here.

'Something odd? Around here?' asked the older vampire incredulous.

Freddie, wearing tight leather pants and a sheer blouse and with his fangs poking out of his mouth, Brian, dressed as a perfect 19th Century gentleman with a tiny bat poking out of his hair, Roger, looking like somebody who had stolen a much taller gentleman's clothing for himself, and John, looking like a regular university student, all looked at the officers in confusion, while seating in blood-drenched furniture, inside a blood-splattered room.

'I can say anything comes to mind, officers' answered Brian.

'Very well' said Officer Mazzello standing up 'If that's all you have to say, we'll be going. But we'll keep in touch. Let's go, Lee'

Officer Lee stood up and took a card from one of his pockets.

'If you think of something later, you can contact us here' he handed the card to Brian, then his eyes and mouth opened wide 'What... What is that?' he pointed at Benny.

Brian looked desperately at the others, Freddie was focusing intently on the two officers, John shrugged his shoulders and Roger was just frowning. He was on his own.

'Oh, THAT!' said Brian 'That is... that is...my... You know, that is...'

'It's adorable, that's what it is!' squealed Officer Lee' Look, Mazzello, isn't that adorable!'

A small smiled formed in Officer Mazzello's mouth and his eyes softened a tiny bit.

'It _is_  pretty cute' he said.

'What's its name? Can I pet him?' asked officer Lee.

'Oh, yeah... sure. His name is Benny.' answered Brian.

'Hello, Benny' Officer Lee petted the little bat's head. Benny started making contented noises and soon, he was climbing the officer's hand and rubbing his ears against the man's fingers. 'Oh, look at that! I think he likes me!' said Officer Lee happily.

'He sure seems to have a type' muttered Roger.

'I didn't know you could domesticate bats like that' said Officer Mazzello, still suspicious but being won over by the adorable creature.

'Well, Benny is pretty special' answered Brian. Roger snorted.

'I'll say!' agreed the tall officer.

'Lee, we should be going' said officer Mazzello.

'Well, it was very nice to meet you, little one. I hope I'll see you again' said Officer Lee softly to the bat as he put him back on Brian's head.

'We'll keep in touch' warned Mazzello to the others, his tone turning cold once again.

'I'll walk you to the door, officers' said Freddie.

As they walked away, they could hear the police officers exchanging whispers.

'That was very unprofessional' they heard the red-headed officer murmured to his partner.

'I know, but did you saw that little bat!

'I saw! but I kept my squealing on the inside, like any good police officer. When we get back, we are reviewing the police procedure for engaging with possible suspects.'

'Sorry, Mazz'

Brian sighed in relief when he heard the front door closing, but John looked worried.

'That is going to bring trouble' said the bassist.

'They did seem pretty suspicious' admitted Brian.

'But it wasn't us! We don't hunt around our nest, we are not stupid!'

Freddie came back and plopped himself on the sofa.

'Well, that's bad news darlings. We have to be more careful.' he said.

'But it wasn't one of us. We never hunt around here' retorted Roger.

'I know, but something is'

'Or was' said Brian 'What about Tim? Was he hunting?'

'Not to my knowledge' answered Freddie, pensively 'But then, he was doing a lot of things without my knowledge.'

'If he was planning on leaving, maybe he didn't care about hunting around here.' suggested John.

'That sounds very plausible' said Brian.

'That selfish bastard. He is a pile of dust in the basement and he's still screwing us over!' yelled Roger. He stood up, kicked the coffee table and left. A moment later, they heard the front door open with a bang and another yell 'And what the hell happened to the garden!'

'I better go talk to him, he gets destructive when he is mad' said Freddie and followed the blonde in a rush shouting: 'So help me god, Roger Meddows Taylor I am going to fucking dust you if you touch one of Jim's flowers!'

'Well' said Brian 'speaking of dust, it's about time to clean the basement, see if I can find any of Tim's books'

'I'll help you' offered John.

Distant screams could still be heard from the garden as the two men got the cleaning supplies and made their way to the basement.


	12. Spring Cleaning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's cleaning, pinning and crying, with just a bit of relationship advice sprinkled on top. Just a typical night for the boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, no beta. 
> 
> And just in case you missed it, I wrote a little something about our favourite police officers. Brian and Roger make a small cameo in it. If you want to read it, here it is https://archiveofourown.org/works/17533886

The basement was dark and big, full of cobwebs and dust. Brian and John stood on the stairs and contemplated the daunting task for a moment.

The bassist hadn't had time to see the place fully the night before, having other things on his mind, like saving his friends and not dying, but now that he did, his stomach turned. The place was filthy and smelled like death, rotten flesh and decay. There were light bulbs on the walls, all around the room it would seem, but only one was actually working, hanging from the ceiling in the middle of the basement. John thought that maybe he was imagining things, but in the dark corners and nooks, pushed out of the way, he could see shapes that suspiciously looked like people and bones. He suddenly could feel vile rising from his stomach. He took a deep breath and tried to swallow, but the stench invaded his lungs and it only made him feel worst.

'Why don't you go to the kitchen and see if you can fix the lights?' Brian suggested noticing where the man was looking and his discomfort. 'I can deal with the... I can start here. Don't worry.'

John nodded and went back upstairs, where he took a few moments to breathe deeply and calm down. He had brought some tools anticipating having to do some work in the vampire's house. He went to the power generator and opened the box, making a small cloud of thin dust form before him. All the electrical connections were as old as the house and it was a miracle they were still working. He made a mental note to see how he could update the system.

'I'll have to cut the power for a while!' he shouted to Brian.

'Not a problem!' the vampire shouted back. 'I can see in the dark.'

In a second, all the lights went out. He could still hear the sounds of Roger and Freddie fighting outside, the bassist doubted the garden would end up unscathed after that. He thought that maybe he should feel afraid, standing in the dark in an old creepy house with only three vampires for company, but he didn't. It was fine, normal even. That made him smile and made part of the queasiness go away. He had made a choice of staying with them. Now he had to toughen up and fully accept their lifestyle. He took out his torch and started to work.

About forty minutes later, the power was back on. John was putting away his tools when Freddie and Roger entered the kitchen, arms around each other shoulders and giggling about something. Roger was covered head to toe in mud, and there were twigs and leaves in his hair. Freddie still looked immaculate but was now wearing a flower crown made of yellow daisies and freesias.

'Nice to see you two had fun outside, while we were working hard.' commented John.

'Somebody had to show Roger who is the boss around here' laughed Freddie.

'You had an unfair advantage! That bloody cat of yours made me stumble' exclaimed Roger, but he was still smiling.

'It was well deserved. You were about to start destroying Jim's beautiful gift and we just couldn't stand for that, darling.'

'I still think it looks too fancy. We won't be able to bury any more bodies out there.'

'We'll manage. We can bury them on the lot next door.'

'Where's Brian?' Roger asked John.

'In the basement, he was going to start cleaning the... cleaning it. I came here to see if I could fix the rest of the lights down there.'

'And did you?' asked Freddie.

'I think so. The problem is the wiring. It's very old. I managed to patch some of it up and it should be working now.'

'That's so clever of you!' exclaimed Freddie, patting the younger man in the back.

'Oh, it wasn't hard. Anybody could have done it.' he said, blushing.

'Don't be ridiculous. We three are useless in all that. Well, maybe Brian could have figured it out, but he is never interested in any of that practical staff unless it has to do with his guitar.' said Roger.

'In any case, you have to learn to take a compliment, dear. Once we are famous you'll receive them all the time.' added Freddie with a wink.

John just laughed.

'We better go help Brian' he said 'that place was a mess. It's going to take the four of us to fix it.'

When they went downstairs, a cool breeze welcomed them. All the lights were working and John could see that Brian had gotten rid of the bodies that littered the nooks and crannies of the basement. Two suspiciously big bags had appeared in one corner. Brian had also opened the row of windows to let the night air drive away the putrid smell.

'You manage to fix the lights! Well done!' he smiled at John when he saw them, but soon his expression changed into a frown 'Rog, what happened to you?'

'Freddie beat me' he said and plastered himself against the guitarist, wrapping his arms around his thin waist.

Brian enveloped the smaller man with his arms almost as an automatic reflex. Then he looked at Freddie with a quizzical expression.

'He fell on the mud and then slipped a few times when he was trying to get up. Although I admit that I did make fun of him'

'Oh, you poor thing' said Brian smiling. He started to pick the leaves and twigs from Roger's hair and using his sleeves to clean the smaller man's cheeks. Roger just closed his eyes and enjoyed the attention, almost purring at feeling Brian's hands on him.

A loud cough interrupted the men.

'Sorry' said John.

'I thought we were supposed to be fixing this place up' said Freddie.

'But I'm all dirty' complained Roger.

'Well, you were not going get cleaner with how things were going between you two.'

'You have such a dirty mind' said Brian with a red face, he extricated himself from Roger and went to a corner to look for a duster.

Roger just smirked and wagged his eyebrows at Freddie.

'I thought I was going to have to cover poor John's eyes. Our baby can't be exposed to such filth.' teased Freddie.

'Oh, don't worry about me. I've seen worse.' commented John.

'John! You shock me!' exclaimed Freddie scandalized.

'Please' said Roger picking up a mop and a bucket 'Johnny here may look like an angel, but we've seen what the parties are like in his dorm room...'

'Do tell!' said Freddie.

'You have? When? How?' asked John confused.

'After you were kidnapped. We went there looking for information.' explained Roger.

'Did you talked to my roommate, by any chance?'

'Oh, yeah. He wasn't very helpful. Nervous type.'

'Did you tell him I had been kidnapped?'

'Of course not! We were being subtle and the like.'

'Guess that explains why he thought I had run off because the mob was after me' he said, knowing full well what the vampires' version of being subtle was.

'Well, you have to take us to one of those parties one day. They sound delicious' said Freddie grinning.

The three vampires and the human got to work cleaning the basement. They agreed that each of them would take one corner of the room and then they'll just meet in the middle. Every so often, Brian would ask Benny to bring him something that would be manageable for the small bat to carry. Every time, Roger would stop what he was doing to scowl at the tiny creature and hiss at him as he went by. And every time, Benny would fly back making sure to hit Roger in the face with whatever he was carrying, be it an empty trash bag or a dripping dirty washcloth.

They had been working that way for a while, when suddenly, Freddie called for the others.

'Hey! Look at his!' he exclaimed 'Look what I found behind this disgusting curtain!'

What he had found was a bookshelf filled with books.

'Those may be useful to help Benny!' said Brian excited.

'Uh, I don't think so' said Freddie taking some of the books out and reading the titles out loud ' _His Gentleman Boss_ , _The English Scientist's Secret Desire_ , _Untamed Gentleman, Undressed Virgin_ , _Tempted Into The Gentleman's Trap_. These are all trashy romance novels!

'Wait a minute!' said Roger getting close and studying the books 'These are all _my_  trashy romance novels! I mean, historical novels. They are not trashy at all, they are very well written. I wondered where they had got to. That bastard must have nicked them!'

Freddie was trying not to laugh as it held up one of the books. The cover showed a blond young man dressed as a sailor, kneeling and draped around the leg of a tall pirate whose white shirt was opened to reveal a muscular chest and his mane of dark curls was flowing in the wind. The title, in bold red letters, read _The Pirate's Secret Treasure_.

'Interesting. I didn't know you had such a fascination for _history_ , darling.'

'Give me that' said Roger snatching the book from Freddie's hand 'The Age of Sail happens to be a fascinating time in British history.'

'I'm sure' said Freddie, inspecting the other books 'Hey, can I keep this one?' He was holding a copy of _The Gardener's Delight_ '

'Oh, yeah. That one is pretty good. Take also _The Prince's Forbidden Passion_. It has a hunky gardener in it too' suggested the drummer.

When Freddie went to take the book from one of the lower shelves, he noticed something strange.

'I think there is something behind this' he said and started to take books out. Soon, a little door was revealed.

'It's a cupboard!' exclaimed Roger.

Brian moved the shelves to the side revealing the door fully.

'It's locked' said Roger after trying to open it 'We should take it down. Where can we get a mallet?'

'Wait! Before we start destroying our own home, we should be logical. If there is a lock in the door, there must be a key...'

'Well, obviously' said Freddie.

'A key that Tim must have had, otherwise, he wouldn't have been able to open this.' finished Brian.

Suddenly, Benny flew off from his hair nest and started to shriek in the direction of the pile of ash in the middle of the room.

'Of course! Tim must have had it in his person when he was dusted. Well done Benny!' exclaimed Brian.

Having done his part, Benny flew to Brian's shoulder and started to sweetly nibble the guitarist's neck.

'You rascal' giggled Brian and shooed him away. The little bat settled back on his hair looking at Roger smugly. The blonde was fuming, clenching his fists and throwing daggers at the small creature.

Before Roger could explode, however, Freddie stepped to the ashes and pushed them around a bit with his shoe.

'So, I guess we just... dig in' he said, an expression of disgust in his face.

'Ugh' said Roger. Brian just looked at the pile with distaste.

John looked at them confused.

'What's the matter?' he asked 'It's just a pile of ash.'

'Vampire ash' said Freddie.

'I've seen you deal with bodies and bones and blood without batting an eyelash, but you draw the line at vampire dust?' asked John.

'It difficult to explain. It's like you with human bodies, they repel and disgust you. But to us, they are just food, no offence.' explained Brian.

'Vampire dust is like a pulverized vampire corpse. It's just icky to us because... he was one of us' added Roger.

John sighed.

'Then I guess I should be the one to... dig in' he concluded.

The three vampires nodded and took a step back. Freddie threw John a pair of rubber gloves. John put them on and kneeled in front of the pile. He started to look through it. Some of the fine dust started to fly around and got into his nose making his sneeze. Brian gasped and looked away. Roger and Freddie looked like they were about to be sick.

'Here's something!' he exclaimed and extracted a key from the ash. It looked like it would fit the lock.

'Excellent!' said Freddie 'put it in this bucket so we can rinse it.'

'Wait, there is something else' he said, digging deeper and extracting a long chain attached to a small pendant. Benny started shrieking.

'I think Benny recognises it! Maybe it is something that Tim was going to use to bring him back.' suggested Brian, petting the small bat to calm him down.

'Put it in the bucket too' said Freddie scrunching his nose 'I'll put some water and disinfectant on it to soak them up for a bit'

'Have about I just clean this up?' asked John referring to the ash.

Brian and Roger nodded. John swept the ashes and put them in a bag and then disinfected the area under the watchful (and appalled) eye of the two vampires. Soon, the place was pristine.

'Throw away the gloves too' said Roger and John complied.

'There, like new' smiled the bassist.

'Thank you, John' said Brian.

Freddie came back holding up the key and the pendant triumphantly, now completely clean.

'Let's see what's inside!' he exclaimed.

The four men encircled the cupboard. Freddie put the key in the lock and turned it. There was a loud 'click' and then slowly opened to reveal its contents. The space inside was small but completely packed with things. There were piles of old books, but there was also gold bars, jewels and money stacks. There was a variety of papers too, like newspapers articles, old photos and sheet music.

The four men stared speechless at the pile of treasure for a moment. It was Roger the one who broke the silence.

'Holy shit! Is that real? Where did Tim get it?'

'He was really old, he probably accumulated it through the years' answered Brian.

'You mean to tell me that we supported that bastard for years thinking that he was going ga-ga and he couldn't support himself and all that time he was sitting on a literal fortune and scheming behind our backs?' exclaimed Freddie full of indignation 'That little piece of...'

'Well, on the positive side, this is ours now, right? We are his heirs after all.' asked Roger.

'It better be, after all that bastard did' answered Freddie.

'That's a lot of money' said John 'What are you going to do with it?'

'Don't you mean what are WE going to do with it?' said Brian with a smile, playfully bumping shoulders with the bassist.

'What?'

'Well, darling, you were the one who killed him. And you are one of us now. You don't think we are going to leave you out, do you?'

'Really?'

'Of course!' answered Freddie.

'Maybe we can buy some new instruments' suggested Roger looking through the jewels in the cupboard 'I could use a new set of drums.'

'New equipment would be useful, too. New mics, amps and the like.' said John.

'New costumes! And maybe a make-over. We need to update our looks a bit.' said Freddie.

'We can build a studio with actual acoustics. This place down here would be perfect for that' suggested Brian.

'How much money do you think there is in there?' asked Freddie, taking a bracelet from the pile and trying it on.

'A lot! We should take some and go to Miami Sunset to celebrate!' suggested Roger.

'Maybe we should leave it for the moment?' said John 'We should count it first, see how much we really got. Then, we should make a list of all the things we want to do and assign a budget to each, to make sure we don't over-spend.'

'I agree with John. If we want to use the money for the band, we should be careful with it and not go crazy' said Brian

'I guess you are right' sighed Freddie and put the bracelet back in the pile.

'Fine,' said Roger 'but can we go out anyway? I'm starving.'

'Actually, I'm feeling a bit peckish myself' commented Freddie.

'Great! Brian?'

'I'd rather stay. I want to check those books and see if I can find something to help Benny.' said Brian.

'Argh, that bloody bat again!' said Roger

'Don't be like that, Roger.'

'No, that _thing_  is up to something nefarious and he is playing you like a drum.'

'I just promised to help him, that's all. Nothing nefarious about it.'

'Bri, you are too naive. And that stupid bat is trying to drive you away from me, can't you see it?'

Brian walked up to Roger and cupped the blonde's face in his hands.

'Rog, _nothing_ can drive me away from you. You should know that. Benny just likes to tease you to get a rise out of you, that's all. You don't need to worry, ok?'

Roger remained silent. He was still frowning at the bat who slept contentedly on Brian's curls.

'Ok, Rog? Are you still mad?' insisted Brian.

'Maybe' Roger answered stubbornly.

Brian looked around. Freddie and John, who until that moment have been avidly watching the interaction between their friends, looked away quickly pretending they were discussing the contents of Tim's cupboard.

When the tall vampire was satisfied that he didn't have an audience, he leaned towards Roger and gave him a peck on the tip of his nose. This made Roger giggle.

'Let me just check the books for a bit and I'll join you later at the club, ok? You know I don't like hunting anyway.'

'It's a deal' said Roger with a smile.

'That was motherfucking adorable, but I am quite hungry now my dear, so hurry up, Roger. We need to get ready. Are you coming too John?' said Freddie loudly, grabbing Roger by the arm and dragging him upstairs.

'No, thanks. I'll stay here and help Brian. Have fun!' answered John.

'Keep an eye on the bat for me, John!' called Roger, before disappearing upstairs.

Brian just rolled his eyes. John focused on the pile of books.

'Ok, let's get them to the kitchen. I'm dying for a cup of tea.'

 

 

/\oo/\

 

 

'Do you really think I am being paranoid?' Roger asked Freddie as they walked away from the house and to the bus stop.

Roger had cleaned the mud from his skin and his hair was once again free of leaves and twigs. They had both changed into something more suitable for the club. The blonde was wearing a pair of black leather trousers, a blood-red silk shirt and a yellow and black striped jacket. Freddie was also wearing leather and silk, but his trousers were red and his shirt, black. He was also wearing his favourite fur coat. He was rather proud of the ensembles he had created for the two of them.

'Actually, I agree with you.' admitted Freddie.

'You do?' Roger sounded surprised.

'Well, somewhat. I mean, I don't think innocent people go around being turned into bats just because. He did something to deserve that and I won't trust him completely until I know the full story.'

'And what about Brian? Do you think he is using him for some kind of nefarious purpose?'

'Only if by nefarious purpose you mean getting into his pants.'

'What!'

'Roger, I love you but you can be an idiot sometimes.'

'But he is a bat!'

'Only in shape.'

'That little shit, I'm going to kill him!'

'And _that_  is exactly your problem. If you continue acting like this, it would be _you_ who will drive Brian away. You need to keep calm. You know Brian only has eyes for you. It's disgustingly sweet, actually.'

'I just wish he would tell me outright how he feels about me' said Roger softly.

'I know Brian moves at the speed of a glacier, but you need to give him time. He wasn't brought up in the most emotionally open environment, so it's not easy for him to sort his feelings out. But I know he'll get there in the end.' said Freddie and put his arm around Roger's shoulder 'What you need to do is stop acting like a prick everytime that bat does something, dear. Just because he is copying your technique, it doesn't mean he will be successful in the end.'

'Copying my technique?' asked Roger confused.

'Roger, you may be an idiot, but I know you are not dumb. That cutesy, helpless thing that you do to get Brian's attention. You know, looking like a puppy that's just been kicked?'

Roger blushed.

'Don't worry, I'm not criticizing. It works for you, and Brian eats it up completely. But you don't have to worry, that only works with Benjamin because he is a small adorable _bat_. As a human, it would be a completely different story.'

'I guess' said Roger, looking down.

As they kept walking, a dark figure appeared behind them and started to follow. Roger and Freddie shared a look.

'I smell trouble' whispered Freddie without looking back.

'I'll take care of it. Meet you at the club?' asked the blond.

'As you wish' said Freddie and, as Roger slowed down his pace, he began walking faster leaving the other vampire behind.  
  
After a minute of walking on his own, Roger felt the stranger catching up with him. Suddenly, a hand covered his mouth and a sharp blade poked him in the back. The drummer smiled and cracked his knuckles. This was going to be fun.

 

 

/\oo/\

 

 

Freddie dragged the body into the alley of Miami Sunset. The man wasn't dead yet, but it would not be long until he was. He never had any difficulty in finding a meal. A smile here, a wink there, and he got them. He guessed he could use his powers just as easily and with much less fuss, but he always found it somewhat dishonest. He considered his natural charms more than enough for the task, and fairer for his victims.

He propped the body against the wall and sunk his teeth on his neck again. He drank deeply. Suddenly, a loud noise sounded behind him. The heavy back door of the club opening and closing. He turned around, blood dripping from his mouth and then let go of the body in shock, it fell on the floor with a barely audible thud.

Jim was standing there. He looked straight at Freddie and then at the body laying on the floor. He looked upset and distressed.

'I'm... I'm sorry. We didn't mean to interrupt' he said and abruptly walked away.

Only then, Freddie noticed the second gnome, much shorter than Jim and sporting a full beard. He threw Freddie a disgusted look and followed Jim.

The vampire wiped the blood with his sleeves and then ran after them.

'Jim, wait!' he shouted 'Please, let me explain.'

Jim stopped and turned around. His face was blank and emotionless. 

'There is nothing to explain' he said.

'Please, just talk to me' Freddie extended his hand towards Jim, but no sooner had he touched his arm, that the other gnome was on him pushing him away and putting himself between the two.

'You filthy parasite, how dare you to touch the Prince? Permission to get rid of him, your highness!'

'What! No, permission denied. And don't dare call him that again!' said Jim pushing him away. 'Go back to the park, I'll meet you there.'

'With all due respect, your highness, I was hired to protect you, so I am not allowed to leave your side.'

'I can protect myself' insisted Jim. The other gnome just looked at him impassively.

'Ugh, fine. Go stand over there. It's an order.' the gnome scowled at Freddie but moved away.

'Who is that?' asked Freddie.

'My new bodyguard. My parents sent him from Ireland.'

'They think you need protection?' he asked.

'They think I need to be kept away from any deviations from their plans'

'Deviations, eh?' Freddie got closer to the gnome with a flirty smile 'So there is more than one?'

The gnome's cold demeanour finally cracked and he smiled warmly at the vampire.

'You should know better than anyone that there is only one' he said, then took the vampire's hands in his 'Freddie, I'm sorry for how I reacted just now. But I meant it when I said, you didn't need to explain. I don't begrudge you your nature, but seeing it first hand was... I don't like seeing death.'

'Your Highness, the others are waiting' called a voice from behind.

Jim looked at the other gnome and nodded.

'Can you stay for a bit? We can go into the club and have a chat' Freddie asked.

'I'd love to, Fred. But I can't stay.' Jim looked away and then sighed, then locked his eyes to Freddie's again. 'You know I have to go.'

'Of course, another time then.'

'No, I mean, to Ireland. After the Masquerade.'

'You know you don't have to, you can stay here.' he whispered, getting closer to the gnome.

'If I do, they'll cast me away. I'll lose my family, my friends, my brethren. What would I have left?'

'You'll have me! You can come and live with us, and do whatever you like in the garden.'

'I'd love that, I really would. But what happens if you get tired of me? Or if you find someone else? Someone more interesting? Then, I would truly lose it all. I'd have nothing left.'

'But I won't get tired, of course I won't.' the vampire said desperately.

'You don't know that. I'm sorry Freddie, but the sacrifice is too great. I don't know if I can bear it' said Jim, eyes wet with tears.

'Your Highness' reminded the other gnome.

'I have to go.' he said 'Please, don't cry. Someone like you shouldn't be crying over someone like me, I'm not really worth it.'

'You are worth everything to me, Jim. You need to know that. We belong together, and I'll fight anyone who doubts it, even if it's you'

'Goodbye, Fred' he said with a watery smile.

The vampire saw him join the other gnome and walk away, disappearing in the night. Then he dried his tears with a new determination in his heart. His plan  _would_ succeed. He wouldn't let Jim get away. He would get his mate in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most of the titles of Roger's novels are actual titles from novels that I found on the internet and that I adapted slightly. So good news for anyone interested in reading "Untamed Billionaire, Undressed Virgin" "Her Cattleman Boss" "Tempted Into The Tycoon's Trap" or the like.


	13. John, the (not so) teenage witch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John discovers a new talent that may bring more trouble to the group. Officers Lee and Mazzello are still on the case.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No beta!

The sun hadn't quite set yet. A pale light flooded the street making the abandoned buildings and gardens seem ghostly and unreal. John thought how much nicer the neighbourhood was during daylight hours and wondered why people had abandoned it. Its silence made every little sound echo and magnify, the rustle of trees, the song of birds and his own steps on the sidewalk. It was such a difference to the bright colours and the constant cacophony of his regular life, like stepping into another world.

The previous night, Brian and he had tried to examine the books they had found in Tim's lair. But the guitarist had been distracted, worried about what Roger had said, so after a short while of staring blankly at the books, sighing and wondering what the drummer was doing, John had offered to take the books with him and examine them on his own. He didn't have any classes that day and would have the time to inspect them thoroughly. He had also offered to take Benny with him to give Brian and Roger the chance to talk things through without any kind of animal interference. While he didn't agree with the blond about the small bat's evil intentions, he believed that the creature was definitely trying to drive a wedge between the two men.

Brian gladly took on his offer and helped him pack the books and the pendant. The bat, however, was another matter. He wasn't happy about leaving Brian, he fuzzed about, shrieked and refused to let go of Brian's shirt. In the end, Brian had to pet him and talk to the little thing softly for about five minutes, until the creature reluctantly let go and climbed onto John's jacket. Brian looked a little guilty for a moment, but it soon passed. He walked with John to the bus stop talking excitedly about some song he was working on and all the new possibilities opened to the band now that they had money, and then said goodbye when his bus came, wishing him luck with the books.

John had spent the whole day pouring over the old tomes. He was surprised to find that he really enjoyed them. He had expected vagueness, subtlety and mysteries, and he was pleasantly surprised in finding the exact opposite. Magic, much like science and engineering, had strict rules, concrete instructions and clear consequences. It was something that could be studied and mastered.

On researching the books, he had easily found the spell to turn the bat into a person again and was pretty confident he could make it work. He had gone to the shops and gotten most of the necessary ingredients. As for the rest, he hoped the vampires could help him get.

John walked the last few blocks quickly. He could feel Benny starting to stir on his breast pocket. He has been sleeping since morning and maybe he was starting to get hungry. Suddenly his little head popped out and looked around. Seeing where they were and where they were heading, cheered the little creature immensely.

As he was getting closer to the house, John heard a strange sound, shushed urgent whispers coming from up ahead. It was then that he noticed a police car parked in front of the house. That wouldn't have been strange anywhere else, but it was a very peculiar sight in the otherwise abandoned neighbourhood. From behind, it looked like it was empty, but the could still hear parts of a mumbled conversation.

'He's coming! Stay down!' an angry whisper.

'Maybe we should have parked a little further away, Mazz' said another voice.

'We'd have needed binoculars and I couldn't get them. Sergeant Malek lost the key to the supply room'

'I can't feel my back anymore'

'Shhh, he may hear us'

John recognised the voices immediately and sighed.

'Hello officers' he said leaning on the car's window.

Officer Mazzello and Lee looked at him from where they were hunching.

'Erhmm, hi?' said officer Lee.

'Here it is!' suddenly announced officer Mazzello straightening. Officer Lee followed suit looking confused. 'I'm sorry, my partner dropped this and we were just looking for it.' He explained, holding the object tightly. 

'A cat toy' said John.

Officer Mazzello checked the object he was holding. It was indeed a cat toy.

'Yes,' he agreed.

'Do you have a cat?'

'Not on me, no.'

'I like playing with it!' exclaimed officer Lee abruptly. He looked at his partner, who was frowning 'You know, like a stress reliever? Being a cop is very stressful'

'I'm sure' commented John.

Benny chose that moment to make himself known by jumping on Officers Lee. The man caught the little creature with a delighted smile.

'Hello, little one!' he said 'Look Mazz! It's Benny! Isn't he lovely?'

'Stay focused!' muttered Mazzello.

But officer Lee continued to pet and praise the little bat, who was eating it all up, closing his eyes and softly rubbing itself against the man. John just rolled his eyes.

'Are you patrolling the neighbourhood now?' he asked Mazzello.

'Yes, of course. That is what we are doing here.'

'I feel so much safer' commented John dryly.

Mazzello eyed him suspiciously.

'What are you doing here at this hour?' he asked.

'Just visiting my friends.'

'At this hour?'

'We are musicians, we don't follow society's conventions. We are rebels.'

'I see. And how long have you known these men?'

'A while'

'Have you noticed anything strange about them? Anything out of ordinary?'

'No'

'And you are?'

'John Richard Deacon. I was born on August 19th, 1999. Anything else?

'No. Please, don't let us keep you' a giggle came from the seat next to him. Officer Lee was squirming and laughing as if something were tickling him. The bat was nowhere to be seen. 'LEE, STOP PLAYING WITH THAT ADORABLE BAT!'

'What? Oh, sorry' he put his hand inside his shirt and retrieved the bat giving it back to John 'He just went under my shirt. I think he may be cold.'

'Yeah, sure' said John unconvinced. He put the bat back in his pocket muttering something that sounded like 'shameless' and then started to walk away 'See you around officers!'

'Bye! Bye, Benny!' said officer Lee.

Officer Mazzello was writing in his little notebook.

'There is something off about this. We need to investigate that boy. I'll send an email to Sergeant Malek and we'll see what he can find.'

'So, we are staying here tonight?'

'Of course! It's a stake-out. We can't give up that easily.'

'But he will tell them that we are here.'

'We'll just move the car a bit. That'll throw them off. Now, what snacks did you bring?'

 

  
/\oo/\

 

  
John entered the kitchen to find Freddie looking through a pile of clothes and Roger counting stitches.

'John! Excellent! Right on time! Stay still for a moment' and before John could put any of his things down, Roger came at him with a measuring tape and started to take measurements of his shoulders and arms. 'Freddie said that if I finish your sweater in time, you could wear it for the masquerade.'

'I said _maybe_  he could.'

'Where's Brian?'

'He's trying some clothes. I'm trying to get ideas for our new looks.' At that moment Brian entered and Roger burst out laughing. He was wearing a leopard print jacket with black spots, rainbow-colored stripes and huge shoulder-pads, a white waistcoat and black high-waisted trousers.

'Not good?' he asked, looking down.

'You look like an 80s businesswoman about to go to a hostile takeover' said John.

'That sounds important'

'It wasn't a compliment'

'No, they are right, that outfit it's not _it_ , the lines are all wrong, It doesn't flow.' said Freddie.

At hearing Brian's voice, Benny popped out of John's pocket and flew straight to him.

'I think Benny likes it!' he laughed.

'Well, bats are blind. They see with their ears' said Roger trying not to sound like he wanted to kick the bat out of the window.

'That doesn't sound right' said Freddie. 'How can they see through their ears?'

'Sonar' said Roger 'That's why their ears are so horrendously big. They are like submarines with wings. And awful ears.'

John was going to comment but decided against it. There were more important things to talk about.

'Changing the subject, those police officers that came yesterday are staking out the house.'

'The cute ones?' asked Freddie.

'The short one is cute, but I think the tall one is a bit too gangly' said John.

'Please, gangly? He is pretty cute. The shorter one is only ok looking.' intervened Roger.

'I mean if I had to rate them...'

'ANYWAY,' said Brian, interrupting Freddie. 'Did they talk to you?'

'They just asked a few questions about you three. They definitely suspect you are responsible for all those disappearances.'

'Shit, we'll need to be extra careful. We'll have to stay in tonight.' said Freddie.

'I don't suppose we could just... kill them, right?' suggested Roger.

'Mmmm, interesting.' said Freddie considering the idea 'That _would_  solve the problem.'

'What?! No!' said Brian.

'They'll end up sending more officers and you can't kill the whole force.' said John.

'Well....'

'Roger, no. As long as we are careful, nothing should come of it. They have no proof.' said Brian.

'Fine.'

Freddie was already rummaging the pile of clothes and picking a new outfit.

'Here, try this one' he said to Brian and the tall man took the clothes and left the room again.

A minute later, Roger stood up.

'WAIT, was that bloody bat with him? Brian, don't take your clothes off!' he ran off yelling.

'Roger! I'm not wearing any trousers!' they heard Brian scream.

'Don't worry, I'm not looking! UNLIKE SOME!'

Then there were some distant crashes and soon Roger came back again holding Benny tightly.

'I know what you're up to, you little pervert. The moment you are back to human form I'm going to kick your ass.' he hissed, then placed the bat on the table 'I'll be watching you like a hawk.'

Brian entered the kitchen again, cheeks slightly red. He was wearing a loose white blouse and tight black trousers.

'Oh, yes! That's it. Imagine some pleated silk in white that flows around you as you move. That would be divine!' exclaimed Freddie excitedly.

'I like it. At least it would be comfortable and the white will make my guitar stand out' smiled Brian.

'You look great, babe' said Roger winking at Brian, whose blush intensified.

Benny shrieked.

'Hey! I'm still watching you!' reminded the drummer to the bat.

Brian left the room again and when he came back, he was wearing his regular old-fashioned clothes.

'So, John, were you able to do something with the magic books?' he asked.

'Yeah, actually, I think I found a spell that could change Benny back.' answered John. He looked inside his backpack and took out one book. It had a piece of paper marking one page. 'It's called _redire quibus pythonicus_. I'm pretty sure it can return him to his original.'

'That's fantastic!' said Brian.

'Well done, John!' congratulated Freddie.

'Great!' exclaimed Roger 'can we do it now?'

'Today, maybe. It needs to be done during the witching hour. I got most of the ingredients, candles, dried flowers, honey and the such. But some things were more difficult.'

He handed the list to Freddie who read it out loud.

'Pubic hair of a virgin, bone dust of a murder victim, soil from an unconsecrated burial site and a dead bat.'

'I think we can manage that' said Roger.

'Piece of cake' agreed Freddie.

'All of it?' asked John impressed.

'Sure, we have some bones from Tim's victims downstairs and we have been burying bodies in the garden for ages, so that should work.'

'I'll ask Delilah to go hunt us a bat. She's rather good at it' added Freddie.

'The pubic hair of a virgin could be more difficult.' said Roger thoughtful. 'They are harder to find these days.'

'You'd be surprised' said Freddie with a smirk, looking straight at Brian.

'Bri?' said Roger, eyes opened wide.

'What? I don't... I mean, I'm really not...' stammered Brian.

'There's nothing to be ashamed, Brian.' assured Freddie.

'He's right, Bri. Many people prefer to wait for just the right person, you know. Maybe for a friend that has known you for a very long time, who lives with you and occasionally sleeps in your coffin...' Freddie kicked him under the table and scowled at him 'Anyway, you know it's fine. Completely fine.'

'And you know, if you are, which is fine 'added John 'It would actually be great because it would mean that we could do the spell tonight. You'd be doing Benny a huge favour.'

'Urgh' said Brian burying his face in his hands. Then sighed and uncovered his face 'Fine, I'll do it for Benny'

'Yey!' said the three men and enveloped the guitarist in a group hug. Benny, seeing his chance, also joined the hug and nuzzled Brian for a few moments, until Roger grew wise and swatted him away.

'Hey! Don't get cheeky' he growled. The bat backed away but kept on flying up and down in the vicinity of the group.

'Ok, ok, Go away. And please don't mention this again, ever.' said Brian, pushing the others away.

'I'll go talk to Delilah!' said Freddie. 'And then, I'll get the soil.'

'I'll get you the pulverized bones.' said Roger.

'I'll start preparing everything in the basement. It's probably the best place for it.'

They all looked at Brian, who sighed and stood up.

'I guess I'll get the... the hair.'

'Do you need any help?' asked Roger with a wink.

'Roger!' exclaimed Brian indignantly and left the room.

Benny made to follow him but the drummer was too fast for him.

'In your dreams, you come with me. I'm not taking my eyes off you not even for a second.'

 

  
/\oo/\

 

  
Five minutes to three they were all in the basement watching John putting the last touches on the spell. Candles were lit, symbols were drawn, sage was burnt, flowers were scattered, everything was in place. Next to him there was a pot where he had mixed the potion. He had drawn a circle with chalk and then traced it with salt mixed with bone dust. In the middle of it, there was Benny next to the dead bat, laying on the floor head to head. John took some of the soil and sprinkled it over the bats. The clock struck three o'clock.

'It's time' said John.

'Don't be nervous, we'll be right here' said Freddie.

'Good luck!' said Roger.

'I know you can do it' said Brian.

John nodded and kneeled next to the circle. The book opened next to him, although he had already memorized the incantation. He made a signal to Roger and the lights went out. Only the flames in the candles lighted the room.

He started to chant in a low voice. As he did so, he took the pendant and put it around Benny's neck. Then, he got the potion and anointed the bat with it. After that, he did the same for the dead bat. Once he finished, he took the big red candle that was next to him and poured its molten was on the dead bat. Finally, he recited the end of the incantation. He took the red candle again and blew its flame. All of the other candles were extinguished as well as if by a gust of wind. The whole room was sent into darkness.

'Did it work?' asked John with a slight tremor in his voice 'What can you see?'

'Nothing' answered Freddie 'We can't see anything. This isn't natural darkness. It's something else.'

'Maybe be should... ' said Brian, but John interrupted him.

'No, we started this, we have to see it through' he said.

Suddenly, the bassist felt a force pushing his chest and throwing him against a wall.

'John, are you ok?'

Before he could answer, they heard a shrill scream. It was like nothing they have heard before, it resonated painfully in their ears and echoed loudly all over the house. There was agony in the sound and despair.

And then, everything was over. Roger turned on the lights and the four men gasped in unison. There was a man standing where Benny had been. A very naked man. He was young and around Roger's height. He had short blond hair, big blue eyes, a cherubic face and plump lips. His body was lean and muscled. John stood up to looked at him closer and noticed that the pendant was now hanging from his neck. Then he looked down. The other bat, the dead one, had turned into a smoking pile of ashes.

The man was staring at his hands in amazement, moving his fingers as if to check if they worked. Then he looked up with a smile.

'It worked! It actually worked! This is fantastic!' he said in a deep voice. He hugged a very shocked John. 'Thank you, thank you, thank you' he kept repeating.

'Benny is it really you?' asked Brian doubtfully.

The man turned around and his eyes light up.

'Bri!' he exclaimed, then threw his arms around the guitarist's neck, pressed his body against the other man's and started to pepper his face and neck with kisses.

Brian, never having had this amount of naked man in his arms was unsure how to proceed, so he patted the man on the back awkwardly. His deep blush now extending from his face towards his neck.

Roger, on the other hand, had no doubt about what to do. He grabbed the man's arm and pushed him away from Brian.

'Hey! Leave him alone!' he roared 'He doesn't like strangers crowding him.'

The man just smirked and attached himself to Brian's arm.

'But I'm not a stranger.' he laughed 'Oh, I'm sorry _Roggie_ , but I'm just so grateful to your _friend_  here. He helped me out so much, I'd do _anything_ for him.'

Roger started to emit a low growl and his fists were shaking, but before he could pounce, however, Freddie squeezed his shoulder and pushed him back with a nod.

'As much as it pains me to say it, I think you should put some clothes on, darling, and then we should have a _amicable_ talk upstairs. We have a lot to discuss.' he said.

'Y...yes, Freddie is right. We should go upstairs and get you some clothes.' said Brian starting to recover.

'I actually don't mind staying like this' he purred. Roger huffed.

'N...no, it's not proper. You should wear clothes.' answered Brian, looking everywhere except at the man.

'Ok, whatever you like, Bri' he smiled sweetly.

'Ok, enough of this. Come with me, I'll get you some clothes.' Freddie dragged the naked man up the stairs. John followed quickly, leaving Brian and Roger alone.

'Rog are you ok?' asked Brian.

Roger didn't answer.

'Come on, Rog, talk to me.'

'I'm just so... argh' he shook his hands then kicked a candle across the room. 'Did you see him? All over you? Kissing you?'

'He was a little untoward, but he was just exhilarated about being human again. I don't think...'

'Brian, I swear to Satan if you say he didn't mean it...'

'I'm not saying anything. I just don't want you to get upset about it.'

'Well, too late. I am upset about it. Seeing him all over you upset me. Seeing him touch you as if you belonged to him upset me. Seeing you _not pushing him away_  upset me.'

'Rog...'

'No, don't Rog me. I'm too mad to talk now. But don't think you're escaping this, Brian Harold May. We _WILL_ talk later. After I kill that little shit.' And with that, he climbed the stairs and exited the room, leaving Brian standing alone in the middle of the basement.


	14. Ben Hardy, a gentleman and a Capricorn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Benny's dark secret is revealed and it spells trouble for Roger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Believe or not, I actually have a beta! The wonderful [ wombatpop](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wombatpop/pseuds/wombatpop) has done an amazing job in making sense of my linguistic ramblings. And they are also a writer! They have a What We Do in the Shadows/Queer eye crossover fic that is fantastic. I highly recommend everyone to check their work out!

When Brian finally joined the others in the kitchen, he found them sitting around the small round table. A tense silence hung in the air. Benny was enthusiastically eating what looked like a bowl of soup. He was dressed now, or at least more dressed than before, in one of Freddie's silk robes which he had failed to tie properly, so much of his muscular chest was exposed. In front of him sat Roger, staring daggers at the ex-bat. Freddie and John sat at Benny's sides, probably to make sure he was separated from Roger. Freddie had his eyes fixed on the drummer, while John was staring down at a book in his hands, although Brian was pretty sure he wasn't actually reading it. 

 

Benny looked up as Brian entered and smiled brightly. His cheeks were dusted with red and his lips looked glistening pink. Brian returned the smile a little awkwardly. He could admit that the man looked sinfully adorable in a way that made his cheeks heat up, but it was one thing to be able to appreciate his beauty and another to profess for him a desire that transcended the bounds of friendship. There was only one man for whom he had such a connection and Brian went to sit next to him.  For Roger's part, his eyes stayed glued to the other blond man, but as he felt Brian taking a seat next to him he slipped his arm around the guitarist's waist, bringing him just a bit closer to him. The gesture made Freddie roll his eyes. Benny pouted.

 

'Well, since everyone is finally here, we may just as well begin', said Freddie. 'Benjamin. Your name  _ is _ Benjamin, is that right?'

 

'I prefer Ben, actually', he answered.

 

There was a spark in Brian's subconscious. The name brought to life something locked at the back of his mind that was trying to get out. And there was something in the man's eyes and in his smile that made him feel as if he should be remembering something. But there was no actual connection, no memory to attach to the feeling. He felt like his mind was starting to fill with wool. He shook his head. Vampires were particularly sensitive to the spiritual residue that was left by spells and it seemed like the effects of John's spell hadn’t disappeared yet.

 

'Very well,  _ Ben _ . Why don't you tell us a bit about yourself?' asked Freddie politely. 

 

'Very well. My name is Ben Hardy, I am a Capricorn, my favourite colour is blue, I love dogs and cats, I hate getting up early and loud noises.'

 

'That's... nice. Although we had something else in mind', said Freddie.

 

'Like what?' asked Ben in between a mouthful of soup.

 

'Oh, you know like, where were you born, how old are you...'

 

' _ Or _ ', intervened Roger a bit more aggressively 'What the hell are you? What did you do to deserve being trapped in the body of a bat? What do you want from us? When are you leaving?'

 

'Those are all  _ mostly  _ valid questions', conceded Freddie.

 

Ben put the spoon down. The smile disappeared from his face. His eyes filled with apprehension and fear. 

 

'I... I don't want to talk about that.' he said, looking down.

 

'Tough.' said Roger harshly. 'Start talking.'

 

'I...'

 

'We do need the answers to  _ some _ of those questions, dear.' said Freddie kindly.

 

'I don't... ' Ben tried to form the words, but they somehow got stuck in his throat.

 

'I think you did something.' said Roger with a low growl. 'I think you did something so terrible that they transformed you into a bat as a punishment. I think you are a little monster that is now trying to deceive us into believing that you are just a victim.'

 

Ben's eyes filled with tears.

 

'I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!' he shouted, throwing the bowl of soup in Roger's direction, smashing it against the wall. In the blink of an eye, he transformed himself back into the tiny bat and flew away leaving only Freddie's robe behind.

 

'I didn't know he could still do that!' exclaimed Roger.

 

'Well, I didn't actually make him human. I just restored his ability to access his powers and transform back.' said John. 

 

'Well, why didn't you say!' Roger followed the creature hastily. Freddie and Brian took after him right away. John, on the other hand, closed his book with a sigh, picking up Freddie’s robe and following his friends calmly.

 

The group follow the bat into the living room, where he hid behind the curtains.

'I thought it was perfectly clear.' said John coolly. 

 

'Well, I'll rip those curtains down and I'll catch that little bastard!'

 

'Roger wait!' Brian took the other man's arm. 'I agree that he is hiding something, but I think it may not be what you think. He was really upset just now. I think that he might tell me about it.'

 

'But he'll lie!' said Roger.

 

'Maybe or maybe not. We won't know until we give him a chance.' said Freddie.

 

'Fine.' Roger said finally, retreating to a chair in the corner, arms crossed and a frown on his face.

 

'And please, don't intervene. Aggression is the last thing we need.' added Freddie.

 

Roger's frown deepened but he agreed.

 

John and Freddie sat down on the sofa while Brian went to stand next to the curtains.

 

'Benny, it's me, Brian', he said softly. 'Please, come down. I promise you are safe.'

 

A little head popped from the top folds of the curtain and looked at him silently.

 

'I promised that I would protect you and I will keep that promise, Benny. Roger just reacted like that because he is very protective of us and we don't know anything about you. So he's afraid you may hurt us. But he really didn't mean you any harm. Won't you come down here?'

 

The bat hesitated for a moment, but finally, stretched his wings and flew to Brian's hand.

 

'Thank you, Benny. That was so kind of you.' The guitarist held him against his chest to comfort him and also to make sure it didn't fly away again. 'We really need to talk to you. We want to understand you better. And if someone hurt you in the past, you need to tell us so we can help you. I promise I'll keep you safe. Don't you trust me?'

 

For the second time that day, Brian found himself with his hands full of a very naked Ben. This time, however, the surprise was too great and both men fell sprawling to the floor.

 

'He's naked again! Don't you have any decency?' exclaimed Roger.

 

'To be fair, I wouldn't really bother much with clothes if I looked like that', said Freddie, admiring the view. 

 

John walked over to them and offered Ben the robe. The blonde kissed Brian on the cheek standing and put on the robe on without any rush. 

 

'Does that always happen when you transform?' asked John.

 

'No, I can usually manage to get the clothes with me, but I guess I'm out of practice.' He winked at Brian.

 

'He's doing it on bloody purpose, the little shit!' muttered Roger, loud enough for everyone to hear. Ben just smirked. 

 

'Let me help you.' Ben said, offering his hand to Brian who was still on the floor. The man took it and stood up, smiled kindly at the blonde. 

 

Benny joins Freddie and John on the sofa, Brian sat on the coffee table. Roger remained in his corner, keeping some distance. 

 

'Ok, now that everyone is back in human form and dressed, how about we continue?' Freddie asked. 

 

Benny nodded.

 

'Let's start with something easy. Are you human?' 

 

'I used to be. I'm not sure what I am now exactly.'

 

'So you were changed?' asked Brian.

 

'I guess. I think... I think I died. A necromancer brought me back to be his familiar a very long time ago. Many regular familiars don't like working with necromancers, so I guess that's why he needed to make his own.'

 

'Was he the one he trapped you?' asked John. 

 

'Y...yes. At the beginning it was fine, I ran errands for him and helped him with his magic. I wasn't happy, but my memories were fuzzy and he didn't mistreat me, so I didn't complain. But then...'

 

Brian took the man's hand encouragingly and Ben smiled weakly.

 

'Then I started to remember. The thing about familiars is that they work with witches on mutual agreement. But I had never agreed, I was his slave. I tried to escape, but he made everybody who knew me forget about me. My family, my friends, everyone. I had nowhere left to go, so I became his captive. He magically tied me to him so I had to obey him unconditionally. It was awful. I had to clean, wash his clothes and get his ingredients.'

 

'How did you escape?' asked Brian.

 

'Well, in the later years he had become more... unstable. He started to ask weirder and weirder things of me and his spells became more erratic.’

 

'Mind rot. It happens to a lot of necromancers when they are not careful.' explained Freddie. 

 

'And he wasn't careful at all. He was ambitious but hated the work, so he continually skipped corners and ignored safety. Although this turned out in my favour since I found I could disobey him a bit as long as I could convince myself that I was actually doing what he wanted. And as he became less precise, this became easier. One day, he asked me to go to the village and bring him the heart of a girl. But he said FROM instead of OF. So I went to the village and asked a girl to draw me a heart and give it to me as a present. Then stole a pig's heart from a butcher and hid the girl's heart inside it. He didn't notice. That was a huge mistake.'       

 

'What happened?' surprisingly, the question came from Roger, who had unexpectedly become interested in the man's tale.

 

'It turns out the spell  _ really _ needed a girl's heart. So it got ruined and... well... he melted.'

 

'Melted?' asked John a little bit disgusted.

 

' _ Very _ slowly. All was left was this pendant in a pile of goo.'

 

'Ugh.' said Freddie.

 

'Sadly, during his melting, he had time enough to realized that it had been my fault so he cursed me using the same the pendant that he used to control me. So even when he was dead,  I was still tied to him. But at least as a bat I was free of him. That happened around fifty years ago.'

 

'You poor thing', said Brian, holding the man's hand and giving it a supportive squeeze.

 

'But when you did the spell today', he said to John, 'You broke that bond and also, hopefully, the spell that the bastard put on everyone who knew me.'

 

'You think someone on your family or one of your friends may still be alive?'

 

'God no, it has been ages. They are all dead. But there is one person who may still remember me.' Ben's hopeful eyes turned to Brian with a tentative smile.

 

'You don't mean... But I don't...' said Brian confused, he could feel something tugging in his mind, trying to wake up.

 

'What? What do you mean?' asked Roger leaning closer to Brian.

 

Freddie was watching the exchange avidly, looking from one man to the other.

 

Brian looked into Ben's eyes and suddenly, a wave of recognition filled his brain.

 

'William's little brother?' he asked shocked. 

 

Ben smiled brightly and nodded.

 

'I knew you would remember me!' The blond man threw his arms around Brian’s neck and enveloped him in a tight hug. 

 

‘I can’t believe it is really you.’ whispered Brian in Ben’s ear as he returned the hug. 

 

'Who the hell is William?' asked Roger bewildered. 

 

'He was my best friend when I was still alive.' Brian separated from Ben and looked to the closed window, eyes brimming with tears.  

 

'I used to follow you two everywhere, you were so nice to me. Sometimes you'd go to watch the stars at night and I would follow you so you could tell me about them. And you'd let me fall asleep cuddling you and you'd cover me with your blanket so I wouldn't get cold. I was only a few years younger, but you two always treated me like a child.'

 

'I remember.' Brian said with a sad smile and then looked at the young man. 'But Ben, what happened? How did you... How did you die?'

 

'I don't remember exactly. But I remember the night because it was the night I kissed you in the stables.'

 

'WHAT?' Roger shouted. Freddie grabbed his arm. 

 

'It was an innocent kiss! And I hadn't even met you. You weren't even alive then!' said Brian.

 

'Well... still.' Roger pouted. 

 

'It wasn't an innocent kiss for me. It was everything. I loved you so much. But you were in love with my brother. It was after your parents' death, you had come back and had a fight with William. You confessed to him and he... he called you a freak and a sodomite. I had been hiding in the stables and I saw him attack you, so I jumped in your defence. William said that you had corrupted me and that he would call the magistrate. It was then that I kissed you and told you we could go away together to where no one would find us, but you said that you only saw me as a brother and that you couldn’t do that to me, and then you ran away. I ran after you. That is the last thing I remember.'

 

'Ben, I'm so...' The tears that Brian had been holding back started to spill and run through his cheeks. 

 

'No, please Brian, don't say it. I spent years thinking that I've lost you. Finding you here was like a miracle. I love you, I need you to understand that.’

 

'Oh, Benny, I do and I love you too.' Brian said holding Ben's hands in his own.

 

'WHAT!' exclaimed Roger, John and Freddie at unison. Brian ignored them.

 

'But I'm not in love with you and I never will be. To me, you still are like a little brother.’

 

'Oh, thank god!' said Roger, starting to breathe again.

 

'And what's more... there is someone else.' Brian let go of Ben's hands and gestured to Roger who left his corner and joined Brian, taking his hands, face lit up like a Christmas tree.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       

 

'That's right. He is taken, pal.' said Roger smugly. 

 

'This blond screechy trollop? Please.'

 

'He might be screechy, but he is certainly not a trollop.' said Brian firmly. 'So don't talk to him like that.'

 

'Actually, he is a bit of a trollop too.' said Freddie. Nobody minded him. 

 

'But Bri, can't you see? There are so many signs that we belong together! First I find you after  _ hundreds _ of years apart, then you call me by my name even when I was just a bat and then it turns out that you fancy a man who looks like a cheap copy of me! All that has to mean something!'

 

'A CHEAP COPY?!' screamed Roger.

 

'You know? I kind of see it', said John squinting and turning his head to the side.

 

'I'M NOT A CHEAP COPY. I'M 100% ORIGINAL. IF ANYBODY IS THE COPY IT'S YOU!' screamed the drummer.

 

'HOW COULD I BE THE COPY IF I WAS  BORN BEFORE YOU, IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!' retorted Ben, standing up and facing off the other man. 

 

'YOU DON'T MAKE ANY SENSE!' 

 

'WHAT DID YOU SAY?! SAY THAT AGAIN!'

 

'YOU DON'T MAKE ANY SENSE!'

 

'THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU SAID! HOW DARE YOU! BRIAN AND I ARE DESTINED TO BE TOGETHER! HE BELONGS WITH A GENTLEMAN NOT SOME RIFF RAFF FROM THE STREETS!'

 

'A GENTLEMAN! DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH! YOU ARE A RASCAL!'

 

' _ YOU  _ ARE A RASCAL! A MAN-STEALING RASCAL!'

 

'YOU CAN'T STEAL SOMETHING THAT WAS NEVER YOURS!'

 

'WELL AT LEAST I HAVE ACTUALLY KISSED HIM!'

 

'WHY YOU PIECE OF...' Roger lunged at the man.

 

Brian, John and Freddie, who had been looking at the shouting pair, heads turning from one man to the other like a tennis match, jumped to their feet to separate them. Freddie grabbed Roger, John grabbed Ben and Brian got between them.

 

'LET ME GET AT HIM! I'M GOING TO TEAR HIM TO SHREDS!'

 

Ben laughs. ‘YOU CAN TRY VAMPIRE!'

 

'STOP THE BOTH OF YOU!' Brian finally screamed. It was so rare to hear him raise his voice that both men stopped dead. 'Roger, I already said that I picked you, why are you fighting?'

 

'I...'

 

'You already forgot, didn't you?'

 

'MAYBE.'

 

'Ben, I already said that you are like a brother to me. This isn't Roger's fault. Why are you fighting him?'

 

'I don't like him.' mumbled Ben, looking at the floor.

 

'Well, tough. I love you and I would like nothing more than for you to stay here with us, be part of our family, but if you can't get along with Roger, I don't see how you could.'

 

'I'll behave, I promise Bri.'

 

'Good.' he smiled. 

 

'I won't stop loving you and I'll do my best to win you back. But I'll respect your choice.'

 

'Ok, that’s good enough for tonight. Just don't fight.' said Brian tiredly, running his hands over his face. Abruptly, he stopped and looked up. 'Ben, you said that the last night you remember being alive was the night of my fight with William?'

 

'Yeah.'

 

'Oh god.' He looked horrified.

 

'What's wrong?' asked Freddie.

 

'Tim. That was the night I met him.'

 

'Do you think...?' asked Roger.

 

'What? What are you talking about?' asked Ben, confused.

 

'The night of the fight, when I ran off, I met Tim in the woods and he... he changed me. I never saw _ you _ ...' 

 

'You think he killed me?'

 

'It's possible.'

 

'He really was a bastard.' said Freddie.

 

'If he did, then I'm grateful. Because he brought me back to you in the end.'

 

'Argh, stop being so soppy. He already said no.' whined Roger.

 

'I'm just expressing my feelings!'

 

'Well, stop. Brian doesn't like feelings being expressed at him. They make him uncomfortable.'

 

Before another shouting match could start, Freddie interrupted. 'Well, darlings, daybreak is upon us. Time to retire to our coffins.'

 

'God, I'm exhausted! That spell drained me. Can I stay here?' asked John yawning.

 

'You don't even need to ask, dear. The sofa in the music room is yours.'

 

'Great, thanks Fred. I'm going up now. Please don't let them kill each other while I'm gone.'

 

'I won't make any promises', Freddie winked at the young man as he disappeared in the direction of the stairs. 

 

'Roggie, are you coming with me?' asked Brian shyly. 

 

'I think maybe it's best if I went to my cupboard tonight.' he answered. 

 

'Oh, ok.' said the curly-haired man, crestfallen.

 

'I can keep you company if you like, Bri. After all, I have been  _ sleeping with you  _ in your hair all this time.' Ben proposed smiling. 

 

'No, no you can't!' said Roger hurriedly, taking Brian's hand and dragging him to his room. 'Let's go, Brian. I'm staying with you.'

 

'See you tonight, Benny! Don't get in trouble!' Brian bidded farewell and then left with Roger, with Benny following them with his eyes.

 

'Bad luck, dear', said Freddie.

 

'It's not over yet.' answered Ben stubbornly. 

 

'I sympathise, darling, I really do, but you won't win this one. And if you start any shit between them I am going to personally destroy you. Is that understood?' he said cheerfully.

 

Ben just nodded.

 

'Good boy. And don't worry, a good looking lad like you, you'll find someone else right away, don't you worry', he added pinching his cheek. 'Ok, I'm off to my coffin. Delilah must be waiting. You can use the sofa here and tonight we'll find you something better.'

 

'Thanks.' Ben said, and Freddie left. Ben sighed and sat on the sofa. This wasn't how he had imagined his first night as man after fifty years in animal form would be. He went to the window and opened the curtains. The pale sun rays started to shine in the horizon. He decided he wasn't really sleepy and went to the kitchen in search of food. 

 

Three cheese sandwiches and a cup of tea later (god, he had really missed human food), he heard a knock on the door. Curious, he answered it and found a very tall man in a police uniform in front of him.

 

'Hello officer!' he said cheerfully.

 

Officer Lee opened his mouth, but no sound came. In front of him was the most beautiful man that he had ever seen. Blond hair like an angel's halo shining under the morning sun, gorgeous blue eyes and stunning smile. Going red, Officer Lee also noted that the man was wearing a loosely tied silk robe that showed his muscular chest, stomach and down...

 

'Oh, sorry!' said the man re-tying the robe. 'This thing is so slippery, it just unties itself.'

 

'Do... do we know each other?'  he asked. There was something familiar about the man.

 

'Not personally. I'm Ben, Ben Hardy.' he extended his hand.

 

'Oh, I'm Lee. Officer Lee. Officer Gwilym Lee.' he said, shaking it. 

 

'Well, nice to meet you, Officer Gwilym Lee. It's a pleasure.'

 

'No, I'm all pleasure. No wait, that's not it. The pleasure is all mine. Sorry.'

 

Ben laughed and Officer Lee thought it was a beautiful sound.

 

'Are you alone? Where's your partner?'

 

'He stayed in the car doing paperwork.'

 

'So it's just you and me then?' He winked. 

 

'Ah... yeah... I guess.'

 

'So what can I do for you officer?'

 

'I... Uh...' for a second, he completely forgot why Mazz had sent him there. 'Oh, yes! The lights!' he finally exclaimed triumphantly. 

 

'What about them?' asked Ben confused.

 

'They are turned on. It's a waste of energy to have them on during daylight. You should turn me on... I mean off. The lights. You should turn them off.'

 

Ben smirked. 'Will do. Anything else?'

 

'Uh... Nothing I can think of. So maybe I should... you know...' he pointed back to the car, walking backwards.

 

'Bye, Officer Gwilym Lee!' Ben called. The man turned, walking straight into the mailbox and fell on one of the flower beds. 

 

Ben was about to go and help him, but the officer was up in a second. He quickly assured him that he was fine and ran to the car.

 

Ben closed the door and went to the sofa. He had enjoyed seeing the man squirm and stutter, he was very attractive, and not to mention sweet. And maybe he  _ could _ have some fun. Until Brian came to senses, that is.  

 

He went to sleep thinking about the tall man's hands and his gentle blue eyes. 


	15. Out of the frying pan, and into the fires of hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John is tired (or IS HE?), Ben is looking for a fight, and Roger locks himself in a cupboard. Just another drama-filled night in the vampire's house. And it's not even midnight!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My eternal thanks to my amazing beta [ wombatpop](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wombatpop/pseuds/wombatpop) who has done a fantastic job in beating this fic into shape. If you haven't read their work, well what are you waiting for?

_ It was dark. A type of dark that went beyond the absence of light. As if darkness was an entity that occupied space, that sprawled over everything like a disease. It pulsated and shivered. Darkness beyond reason, beyond madness, beyond feeling, beyond sensation. It was stifling and liberating at the same time. Even without seeing, he knew he was walking down a hallway. The same way he knew that the moss-covered walls were wet, that the floor was covered in bones, that the air was fetid and filled with dust, that there was something behind him breathing against his neck and making his hairs stand on end, and that the hallway went on and on without an end. His heart was beating like a chant. Was he a prey being stalked and chased? Or was he a guide leading someone through the dark?   _

_ And the dark, now inside him, kept growing and growing and growing…. _

John woke up with a start. His heart was beating fast and his skin felt cold and clammy. He looked around, confused. A sliver of light from under the closed door showed him the strange shapes all around him. All of the sudden, memories from the previous night came flooding back. The spell, the blond man, the fights. He remembered that he had been too tired to go back to his dorm room so he had crashed at the vampire’s house. He was in the music room surrounded by the band’s strange collection of musical instruments. 

He tried to check the time on his phone and groaned. It was dead and he didn’t have a charger. Was there a clock in the house? He actually couldn’t remember. The three vampires never seemed too concerned with time, other than sunset and sun-up.

He sat down on the sofa and stretched. His muscles were stiff. He needed to convince the vampires to buy a new sofa as soon as possible, or maybe even a bed. He considered budgeting it as a band expense using the money they had found in the basement. He made a mental note of buying an accountancy book. He didn’t get the feeling the vampires were any good at managing money.

As he made his way downstairs, the stillness of the house unnerved him. He was still trying to shake the last remnants of the dream. He didn’t actually remember any details about it, except the sensation of being in danger. It made him feel uneasy. When he reached the doorway to the living room, a soft snore broke the silence. 

Ben was lying on his back on the sofa, his limbs were sprawled in all directions. John knew for sure the man was going to wake up in pain. His face looked even more angelic when he slept, even despite the drool that was pooling at the side of his mouth. But as John looked, there was a pang of something in the pit of his stomach. Distrust? Apprehension? Loathing?

The robe Ben had been wearing was now lying on the floor and, once again, he was naked. John sighed and picked the garment up. As he was about to cover the man, he suddenly changed his mind and hid it under the cushions of one of the chairs. He smirked. There will be quite a scene when Roger came down, maybe an actual fight this time. He only hoped he’d be back in the house by then. He took one last look at the scene and left to look for his things.

Just as he was leaving, he caught a glimpse of his reflection in the foyer’s mirror and, for a moment, it startled him. It was like looking at a stranger. The eyes, mouth, nose and ears were all his, but somehow unfamiliar. He took a step closer to the mirror and touched his face. Had it always felt that way? 

John shut his eyes tightly and rubbed his face with his hands. When he opened them again, everything was back to normal. A sudden wave of guilt crashed into his mind. Why would he want Roger to get mad at Ben? He admitted that he had been a bit entertained but all the drama the night before, but he didn’t actually want them to fight, did he?

He went back to the living room and retrieved the robe. When he left the house, Ben was fully covered.

 

/\oo/\

 

That evening he went back to the vampire’s house. He still felt tired and befuddled, even after spending the whole afternoon sleeping. All the late nights he was spending with the band were catching up to him, he needed proper rest. He would leave earlier today and tell the guys he would see them on the weekend for the band meeting. He hadn’t even started working on his song yet.

Upon reaching the house, he noticed something moving in the garden. John thought maybe it was Delilah on one of her hunting trips, but then saw a tall, red, conical hat in between the flowerbeds next to the mailbox. John smiled.

‘Hello.’

Jim looked startled for a second, but when he saw who it was he relaxed immediately.

‘Hello, John.’

‘I see you’re busy. Did you come to visit Freddie?’

‘N...No. I was just passing and noticed these flowers were a bit squashed, so I decided to fix them,’ he answered looking slightly nervous. ‘So, how is… how is everyone? Doing okay?’

‘ _ Everyone _ is doing fine, but he would be doing much better if you came for a visit. Why don’t you do it now?’

‘No, no. I wouldn’t like to bother him. And I don’t think he really wants to see me’, he said looking down. 

‘Don’t be ridiculous.’

‘In any case, he seems to be busy with that new friend that they have staying, I don’t want to intrude,’ he said looking at the house with sad eyes. ‘I saw him in the window. He looks… interesting.’

‘Oh, Ben. Yeah, he’s staying, I think. He’s not bad.’

‘Then I’m happy for him,’ he said not looking happy at all. ‘Well, I should be off. Goodnight.’

‘Goodnight.’

Jim had only made it a few steps when he turned around to speak to John again.

‘Would you do me a favour?’ he said pleadingly. ‘Would you not tell Freddie that you saw me here?’

‘Why?’ asked John confused.

‘I just don’t want him to know. Please?’

‘Ok, fine. But I think you two are being idiots.’

‘Goodbye John.’ He said smiling sadly and walked away.

When he entered the house he was welcomed by Roger shrill screams, Freddie’s calm voice and Ben’s loud laugh.

‘WELL, I NEVER SAID HE COULD WEAR IT!’

‘Rog, don’t be unreasonable. He doesn’t have any other clothes. And you are about his size.’

‘Actually, his shirts are awfully tight on me. I guess I just have more muscles than he does.’

‘I HAVE MUSCLES!’

‘Where are they then?’

‘I’M JUST NOT SHOWY LIKE YOU!’

There was a loud crash followed by a scream. When John entered the room, Freddie was holding Roger back and Ben was stripping and throwing the clothing at the other blonde.

‘HERE, HAVE YOUR UGLY CLOTHES! I DON’T WANT THEM!’

‘GOOD, THAT WAY YOU WON’T STRETCH THEM WITH YOUR ODDLY SHAPED BODY’

‘Look everyone! John is here! Let’s all calm down and say hello to him!’ 

‘HELLO, JOHN! BENJAMIN STOLE MY CLOTHES!’

‘I DIDN’T STEAL THEM, FREDDIE GAVE THEM TO ME AND ROGER IS BEING A DICK!’

‘FREDDIE, YOU TRAITOR!’

‘John, HELP!’ said Freddie pleadingly. It seemed that the two blondes were too much for him to handle. 

‘Hey, Rog,’ said John softly, getting closer to Roger and placing a hand on his shoulder. ‘You don’t have to lend Ben your clothes if you don’t want to. I’ll go with him to a shop and he can buy his own.’

‘Good,’ answered Roger, hugging his clothes. 

‘But all the shops are closed now, so we’ll have to wait for tomorrow morning. In the meantime, I guess he'll just have to go around, you know. Nude.’ 

Roger opened his eyes wide and saw Ben smirking, as he draped his naked body seductively on the sofa. 

‘I don’t think Brian will have any complaint about that, do you?’

Roger screamed and threw the clothes back at Ben.

‘GET DRESSED, YOU BLOODY SHOW-OFF!’

‘Whatever you say,  _ Roggie. _ ’

The clothes themselves were a faded pair of jeans and a sheer black button-up shirt, which Ben left unfastened. 

Brian came downstairs. He smiled at John, but frowned as he came closer.

‘Hello, John. You look awful.’

‘Jeez, thanks.’

‘Sorry, I meant that you looked tired. Have you been sleeping?’

‘Not well. I’m actually no staying long today. I need some rest.’

‘Well, you can rest here. I’ve just cleaned two of the rooms upstairs. Clean sheets and everything.’

‘Wait, you had beds all this time? Why have I been sleeping on the sofa?’

‘We had them in storage in the attic.’

‘Anyway, I think I prefer to go back to my dorm room. I have a ton of work to make up for my classes.’

‘As you like,’ said Brian smiling. ‘But you know your room will be there when you need it.’

‘Thanks.’

‘So, is my room ready too?’ asked Ben getting closer to Brian and putting his arm around his shoulders.

‘It is.’ Brian tousled Ben’s hair and the man giggled. ‘You look very nice, Benny.’

‘I lend him  _ my _ clothes!’ said Roger not wanting to be left out.

‘I knew you would. You haven’t been fighting, have you?’ he asked as if he hadn’t heard the whole discussion from upstairs.

‘Of course not!’ answered Roger indignantly. 

He took Roger’s face in his hands and gave him a kiss on the tip of the nose, which made the blond vampire smile.

‘Good. Now come with me, Benny. I’ll show you your new room.’

Ben followed Brian out of the room. As he went by Roger he stuck his tongue out. The blond drummer answered by hissing and showing him his fangs. But Ben just laughed and he kept laughing as he climbed the stairs. 

‘Argh, he is such a bastard!’ said Roger kicking a cushion.

Freddie glared at him, picked the cushion, plumped it a bit and put it back on the sofa.

‘Maybe you could  _ try _ not to react like a banshee every time he does something. You know he’s doing it on purpose to get a rise at you. Just ignore him. He’ll get tired and stop.’

‘But he’s trying to steal Brian from me!’ exclaimed Roger, grabbing the pillow again and hugging it tightly as he plopped himself down on the sofa. 

‘That’s impossible, darling! Brian  _ adores _ you. Isn’t that right, John?’ said Freddie sitting down next to him and patting the blonde’s arm.

‘Well, Brian is a human being, not a possession, so I don’t think Ben can actually…’ John answers taking a seat on Roger’s other side.

‘ _ Not _ the answer I was looking for.’ Freddie threw John a pointed look,  the bassist sighed and tried again.

‘Brian loves you, for some reason. He made it clear last night.  Maybe you should focus more on that than on Ben.’

‘That’s a very good point! Brian finally admitted his feelings for you and all you do now is mope about Ben being a little shit.’

‘You are right! Fuck that jerk! I’m going to get my man!’ Roger exclaimed standing up and leaving the room.

‘Wait, we didn’t mean…!’ Freddie tried to say, but the drummer was already climbing the stairs. ‘This is not good.’

John nodded. 

‘We should go after him.’

Both men ran upstairs following the blonde, urged especially by the uncharacteristic silence that came from the first floor. When they reached the landing they saw Roger standing in front of one of the bedroom’s open door. He was staring at the inside of the room and his mouth seemed to be moving, trying to form words, but no sound came. He looked paralysed and, as they got closer, hurt. When they looked inside, they understood why.

Brian and Ben were in the room, laying on the bed together. They both looked blushed and out-of-breath. Ben’s hands were inside Brian’s shirt, unmoving against his chest. The curly-haired guitarist was staring at Roger with his mouth open and a horrified expression. Ben, on the other hand, looked guilty. But there was a strange glint in his eyes. 

Finally, Brian recovered enough to break the silence.

‘Rog, this isn’t… Please let me explain…’ he said pleadingly.

Roger tightened his fists and glared at both of them. Tears were streaming from his eyes.

‘No!’ he shouted. ‘I don’t want to hear it! You can both go fuck yourselves! And I hope you are very happy together.’

And with that, he turned and ran off. A few seconds later, they heard the door of Roger’s cupboard slam shut.

‘Oh, Brian. What did you do?’ asked Freddie with a tinge of disappointment.

Brian pushed Ben away and hurried to stand up and fix his clothes. 

‘Nothing, Fred. I promise. We were sitting on the bed and we were talking about the past, and then Ben remembered how ticklish I was, so he started to tease me and then he was tickling me. And you know how do I get when I’m being tickled. But nothing untoward happened.’

Freddie looked at him for a moment and then nodded.

‘I believe you.’

‘God, I should go talk to Rog, he looked so hurt.’

‘Do you have to?’ asked Ben, grabbing Brian’s arm. ‘Bri, he doesn’t deserve you. He constantly acts suspicious of you. You can’t tell me you want to be with a man who doesn’t trust you?’

‘Of course, he trusts me, he’s just upset!’

‘Look, I just want what’s best for you and I don’t think he is it. You may be too blinded by your feelings to see it, but he is violent, jealous and possessive. And he will end up hurting you in the end!’

Brian shook Ben’s arm and glared at him, eyes filled with fury.

‘STOP! I don’t know what you’re trying to imply but just stop it. You don’t know Roger at all. I’ve known Roger more than a hundred years, I know him better than anybody else, with the exception of Freddie. We know the kind of sweet and amazing person that he is and you have no right to speak to… to my  _ mate _ like that,’ Freddie gasped, but Brian continued undisturbed. ‘Benny, I love you. You are the brother I’ve never had, but if you can’t accept Roger and my relationship with him, then I think it’s best if we spend some time apart. I’m sorry, Benny. It’s the only way.’

Brian’s chest hurt as he left the room. He truly cared for Ben, and if things had been different, maybe his affection could have gone deeper than that. But he had Roger now and he was everything to him. Ben needed to understand that. 

The door to Roger’s cupboard was closed, but Brian could still hear sobs coming from the inside. It broke his heart to think that he was responsible for them. 

‘Rog, it’s me. Please open the door,’ he said softly.

‘No!’ shouted the man from the other side of the door.

‘ _ Please, Rog _ . I promise you, it’s not what you think. Nothing happened.’

Silence. Brian felt a lump on his throat. He desperately wanted to hold the other man and tell him how much he meant to him.

‘I just want to talk to you. Nothing else. You can hate me after, if you want. But please, let me talk to you.’ 

‘You can go talk to  _ him _ if you want, I’m not talking to you ever again.’

‘I did! I talked to him. I told him that we should spend some time apart. And that he needed to accept my feelings for you. And that he should respect you as my… as my mate.’ 

For a few seconds, nothing happened. But then the door unlocked and swung opened. Roger looked at Brian in disbelief. His hair was a mess, his eyes were red and bright and his face was puffy, but Brian thought he had never looked more beautiful. He was so relieved to see him. The last time the drummer had locked himself in his cupboard, it had taken them the best part of six months to get him out. 

‘What did you say?’ he asked in a low voice.

‘I said that I told him that he needed to respect you as my mate.’

Roger shook his head, fresh tears falling from his eyes.

‘But I’m not… Brian, you can’t… You think  _ I _ am your mate?’ 

Fear gripped Brian’s heart. They have never openly discussed it, but he believed that Roger shared his belief that they were mates. Had he assumed too much? Maybe Roger saw their relationship as a temporary thing. After all, they have never spoken in the long term.

‘I mean, that’s just how I feel. You don’t need… if you don’t feel the same it’s fine. I’m don’t want to pressure you into anything.’ 

Brian silently berated himself. He shouldn’t have been so hasty in talking to Roger about being his mate. It made him sound so desperate and clingy. He was surprised Roger hadn’t run off already. But running was the last thing on Roger’s mind.

‘Bri, are you crazy? Of course, I feel the same! You are my whole world!’ he said desperately. ‘I just thought… well, I thought maybe…’ 

Roger mumbled the last part of what he was saying. Brian, now filled with joy at hearing that Roger returned his feelings, got closer to the blond man, looking at him quizzically. 

‘I’m sorry? What was it that you thought?’

Roger looked away. He seemed embarrassed. 

‘I thought maybe… maybe  _ he _ was your real mate.’

‘WHAT? Why would you think that? I told you that I don’t feel that way about him!’

‘I know! But I thought... I don’t know, you have such a tragic story together and he loved you for so long. Maybe it  _ was _ a sign that he found you again, like you are soulmates or something. And maybe you just hadn’t realised how deep your feelings for him were, or maybe you had, but were too noble to tell me. And I felt so selfish, standing in the way of your mate, but I just couldn’t give you up.’

‘Oh, Roger,’ said Brian with a smile as he cupped the other man’s face. ‘That was the most stupid rubbish that I have ever heard in my life.’

‘So you definitely don’t think he might be your mate?’

‘Of course not! Where would you get that idea?’

‘I don’t know.’ he said innocently. But Brian could see the books cramped and piled high in the small space of the cupboard.

‘Oh, for god sakes, Roger. I swear I am going to fucking burn those stupid romance novels of yours, they are rotting your brain.’

‘Mmm, you are so hot when you swear,’ said the shorter man smiling, finally enjoying the feel of Brian’s hands on his cheeks. 

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Oh, Rog…’

Without warning, Roger felt his body hitting against the back of the cupboard. Brian was on him, lips on his. If he had though that their first kiss would be gentle and innocent, he couldn’t have been more wrong. The kiss was so urgent and wild it made his knees weak. One of Brian’s hand moved to his hips bringing their bodies closer. The blond put his arms around the taller man’s neck and buried one of this hands in his curls, grabbing a handful of them and pulling. Brian seemed to like it as he deepened the kiss and moved his hand from Roger’s hip to his ass, squeezing it. Overcome by sensation, Roger threw his head back and moaned loudly, allowing Brian to move his mouth to the blonde’s neck and start to kiss it and nibble at it, sinking his fangs in the soft flesh lightly in a way that made the other man gasp and squirm.

‘God, Bri, I love you so much.’ Roger said almost without breath.

‘I love you too, Rog,’ Brian answered huskily in his ear, then bit his lobe. 

All of a sudden, loud noises came from outside the cupboard. Noises that sounded suspiciously like a fight. Brian and Roger broke apart. Roger sighed and quickly started to fix his hair and clothes. 

‘I guess we better go and see what  _ that _ is about,’ he said with resignation. 

But Brian just closed the door and pushed him back against the wall with a smirk.

‘They can do without us for a night.’

 

/\oo/\

 

Ben saw Brian walking away with a lump in his throat. He knew he shouldn’t have pushed it, but he just couldn’t help himself. The thought of Brian and Roger together made his blood boil. 

‘We need to talk, Benjamin,’ Freddie said in a low and cold voice. 

‘Why? What did  _ I _ do? We were just playing around, nothing happened.’ His eyes opened wide, his features were the very definition of innocence. But Freddie wasn’t a fool.

‘Didn’t I say that if you started any shit between them I was going to destroy you? Wasn’t I clear enough?’

‘But I didn’t do anything! It’s not my fault if Roger…’

‘STOP LYING! I’m not an idiot Benjamin, stop trying to take me for one.’ Freddie was starting to lose his patience. 

‘I’m not lying! You are just taking his side because he’s your friend.’ Ben’s face was red and he was glaring at Freddie.

‘Just tell the truth, Ben,’ John said tiredly.  

Ben’s face became completely blank and his eyes turned glassy. 

‘I planned it. I wanted to do something that would make Roger mad and show Brian violent and possessive he was.’ His voice was disturbingly monotonous. ‘As I heard him climb the stairs I started to tickle Brian so that he would find me with my hands all over him.’

‘Well, that’s… I guess is good that you can admit it,’ Freddie said looking confused.

Suddenly, Ben shook his head and looked up, absolute fury shining in his eyes.

‘YOU BASTARD! YOU FUCKING BASTARD!’ he screamed. But he wasn’t talking to Freddie, he was talking to John.

‘What? What did I do?’ The bassist looked shocked and confused.

‘YOU KNOW WHAT YOU FUCKING DID. DON’T PRETEND YOU DON’T.’

‘Ben, I swear I didn’t do anything.’

‘Ben, calm down. John didn’t do anything to you. He just asked you to tell the truth, I don’t know what…’

‘ASKED? HE DIDN’T ASKED! HE  _ COMPELLED  _ ME! HE FORCED ME TO SAY IT! JUST LIKE THE NECROMANCER USED TO DO!’

When he understood what the man was saying, John’s expression became horrified. 

‘God, I’m so sorry, Ben. I didn’t… I really didn’t mean to do that. How could this have happened?’

‘NO, YOU’RE LYING. THIS WAS YOUR PLAN ALL ALONG. YOU PRETENDED TO BE NICE TO ME JUST LIKE HE DID, BUT ALL YOU WANTED WAS TO USE ME!’

Tears started to fall from Ben’s eyes and he started to shake. He was becoming hysterical. He was about to run off when Freddie came and took his hands. He spoke to him in a very soft and soothing voice.

‘Ben, do you really think Brian would have allowed that? Would he allow us to hurt you?’ Ben shook his head. ‘Of course not. This is just a mistake and we are going to make it right. But first, you need to calm down. Let’s go to the kitchen and talk about it, ok? Would you come with us to the kitchen?’ 

Ben nodded and followed the other men to the kitchen, still visibly upset, but considerably calmer than before. He sat at the kitchen table with Freddie next to it, still holding his hand. John busied himself at the stove and soon presented a steaming cup of tea to the young man.

‘This is all my fault,’ John said miserably. ‘I should have done more research or tried to find an actual witch to do the spell. But I was so excited about being able to help. I’m so sorry. But I promise I’ll fix it. And in the meantime I won’t order you to do anything, I won’t even speak to you if that’s what you want.’

‘That won’t be necessary,’ Ben said sniffing. ‘I’m sorry, I know you didn’t do it on purpose, but it’s just… that feeling of being compelled brought things back and it made me panic.’

‘You don’t have to apologise, we understand,’ Freddie said. ‘Drink your tea before it gets cold.’

Ben sipped at the tea while John re-read the spell trying to see what could have gone wrong. Delilah, sensing someone may need comforting and knowing there was always a good petting to be had from giving it, entered the kitchen and arranged herself on Ben’s lap. Ben gave her a small smile and started to comb her hair with his fingers as the animal purred.

‘There is nothing here that explains what could have caused this,’ he said finally closing the book and throwing it on the table in frustration.

‘Did something out of the ordinary happen during the spell?’ Freddie asked picking the book and skimming through its pages.

‘I wouldn’t really know. The book just describes how to do it, nothing else.’

‘Then maybe we should ask someone with a little bit more magic experience, darling.’

‘Do you know any witches?’ asked John hopefully.

‘No, but I know a warlock.’

‘What’s the difference?’

‘An incommensurable sense of self-importance.’ 

Ben laughed.

‘And do you think Miami will help us?’ John asked.

‘Of course! He loves us! And between you and me, I think he is bored with the whole club business.’ Freddie looked at the clock that hung from the wall and stood up. ‘We should go now while it’s still early, so we can avoid the crowds. Are you coming Ben?’

‘Yes.’

‘Great. Now go and put on a coat or you’ll freeze. There is one on the living room couch.’

‘Sure, mom.’ Ben said rolling his eyes.

‘Cheeky.’

Once, Ben had left the kitchen to go look for it, John turned to Freddie.

‘Should we go tell Roger and Brian?’ he whispered.

‘Better not. In any case, I think they might be a little busy at the moment,’ Freddie said with a wink. 

John rose his eyebrows.

‘Good for them. Maybe Ben ended up doing more to bring them together than to separate them.’

‘That’s what I think, but best not to say anything. Are you ready to go?’

‘I need to get my books and my backpack.’

‘I’ll wait for you outside. The truth is that I’m itching to leave the house. Both Roger and Ben under only one roof may be too much for me’

Freddie left John to sort out his books and pack his backpack.

‘Where is Freddie?’ Ben asked when he came back. He had chosen to wear Roger’s favourite white fur coat. 

John thanked god the other man wasn’t there to see it and hoped that whatever he was doing with Brian would put him in a good enough mood to forgive its disappearance.

Before he could answer, an earsplitting scream came from the garden. John and Ben exchanged looks and ran outside to see what was happening. They found Freddie next to the mailbox staring in disbelief at a paper in his hands. His face was red and his eyes, wet.

‘John! Look at his!’ he exclaimed when he saw them walked up to him. ‘I don’t understand!’

Freddie threw his arms around Ben and started to cry on his shoulder. Ben patted his back awkwardly and look at John for an explanation. John shrugged his shoulders, took the paper and started to read it.

 

_ Dear Freddie: _

_ I’m normally not very fond of letters. If I have something to say, I prefer to do it face to face or not at all. But in this case, I don’t think my heart would bear to see you once again. My determination would be shaken and I can’t allow that now that my mind is made up.  _

_ The reason for my letter is to tell you that I’m leaving for Ireland tomorrow at dawn. I’ve decided to accept the fate my parents have in store for me and finally fulfil my duties as their heir. Don’t think that this is easy for me. This decision has cost me to abandon something that is more precious to me than anything. And I’ll confess that part of me still hoped to find a way to stay. But I see now that I was just delaying the inevitable. Knowing that you have found someone else to make you happy cemented my decision. Now there is nothing left for me here. _

_ I wish you all the happiness and love that I know you deserve. _

_ Jim _

‘I don’t know what he’s talking about, why would I find someone else?’ Freddie cried.

‘Oh… I think I may know what he is talking about.’ said John a little sheepishly and told Freddie about his earlier meeting with Jim. 

‘So what, now Jim thinks that  _ Ben _ is my new boyfriend? That’s absolutely ridiculous!’

‘Hey!’ 

‘And you John?! Why didn’t you tell me right away?!’

‘I promised Jim…’

‘Jim’s not your bandmate and best friend. Your loyalty is with me. You should have told me immediately so I could stop that stupid, noble, gorgeous gnome and set the record straight. Preferably by kissing him.’

‘Sorry,’ John muttered.

‘Well, there’s nothing to it now. And now I can’t go after him! We need to go to Miami’s! You two can’t show up alone, they might eat you alive! Literally!’

‘Don’t worry about it, we can go later’, Ben reassured him.

‘Are you sure, dear?’

‘As long as John doesn’t get bossy, another night won’t hurt.’

‘John?’

‘Let’s get your gnome back!’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, finally some sweet, sweet maylor action! AND IT ONLY TOOK ME 15 CHAPTERS AND ALMOST 39.000 WORDS TO GET THERE! Sorry if you were expecting more smut. I am an awkward goblin when it comes to writing anything worse than heavy petting And also, the chapter was already extremely long. 
> 
> I'll maybe add a few out-takes that are a bit more satisfying for those craving mature content. In the meantime, if anyone feels like writing or doing anything that fills the blanks, they are more than welcome and I will love them forever. Anything that you want to create about this story will be more than welcome.
> 
> And for those jimercury and harlee fans still waiting for the goods: don't worry, your time is coming!


	16. Freddie's Odyssey

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Freddie needs to find Jim before he leaves for Ireland, but things are never easy for the vampire and his human and familiar friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it has been like 200 years since my last update, but now the bitch is back and more messy than ever. None of this would be possible without my amazing beta [wombatpop](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wombatpop/pseuds/wombatpop). It's thanks to them that this chapter is as readable as it is.
> 
> You may spot some new familiar faces making an appearance in the story ; )

‘Let’s get your gnome back!’ John exclaimed, injecting such a sense of urgency in his voice that the group started running without even a second’s pause; and not just because one-third of the group was actually compelled to obey John’s every order. They ran as fast as they could. So fast that if anyone would have been on the street, they would have seen nothing but a quick blur of gleaming sheer fabrics, bright colours and sparkling sequins. So fast, in fact, that they completely forgot that none of them actually knew where Jim was or where they were going. 

However, as they reached the third corner, it turned out that wasn’t their biggest concern. At that point the three men’s sprint came to an abrupt stop. John, doubled over, was trying to catch his breath. Ben, leaning against a fence with his eyes closed, was pale and breathing heavily. Freddie was lying sprawled on the sidewalk looking more dead than usual.

‘I’m... human... and... out of... shape,’ said John between laboured breaths. ‘But... I... thought... you... had... super strength... or something...’

‘I have... been... a bat... for... the last... 50 years... It has... been... some time... since... I’ve done... any running,’ Ben said, barely moving his lips, fearing that if he were to open his mouth too much he would end up throwing up.

‘Super... strength... doesn’t... count... for much... when... you haven’t... exercised... for... the past... 600 years,’ answered Freddie.

A few minutes passed in absolute silence. Eventually, laboured breaths and fast-beating hearts became normal again. Freddie regained some of his lively countenance and slowly got up again. John straightened up, his joints cracking loudly. Ben was now able to stand without fence assistance, although he still looked flushed and sweaty. 

‘Shall we continue, darlings?’ Freddie asked the others. 

‘Sure,’ said Ben sounding unconvinced, but not wanting to seem weak.

‘Although maybe let’s not run,’ John added.

‘Fine, we’ll just fast-walk instead.’ Freddie thought fast-walking wasn’t as strong a romantic gesture as running, but he was willing to compromise for the sake of his human friends (and himself).

‘How far are we going anyway?’ John asked Freddie. The vampire looked at him confused, then opened his eyes wide. ‘I mean, if it’s too far away, maybe it’s better if we take the bus.’

‘Erm…’  Freddie bit his lip and looked away, clearly avoiding the eyes of the questioning bassist.

‘So how far are we going?’ John insisted.

‘Mmm, not far?’ he answered without any kind of certainty and still avoiding his friend’s stare. 

John looked at Freddie narrowing his eyes.

‘You don’t know, do you?’

‘Of course, I do!’ said Freddie defensively.

John just stared at him. Ben used this short reprieve to sit down on the curb and stretch his legs.

‘Fine, I don’t. I just got swept up in the excitement,’ Freddie admitted miserably.

John sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. 

‘Ok, let’s think about this for a moment,’ he finally said. ‘He said he was leaving in the morning. Maybe he’s at the airport?’

‘Gnomes don’t like flying. It’s not their thing,’ Ben said, closing his eyes and leaning against a tree. 

‘Train station?’ suggested John.

‘Maybe,’ conceded Freddie.

‘But he wouldn’t be there now if he’s leaving in the morning. Where would he stay in the meantime?’

‘In a garden?’ said Ben. ‘I mean, he  _ is _ a GARDEN gnome, right?’

‘Whose garden?’ asked John.

Ben shrugged his shoulders, feeling he had contributed enough of his wisdom to the conversation.

‘He likes the gardens from the city outskirts, but I don’t know if he has ones in town,’ Freddie said frowning at the thought of Jim in someone else’s garden and not his own.

‘Then maybe he’s with other gnomes?’ suggested John.

Suddenly an idea struck Freddie and a big smile illuminated his face.

‘In the park! There is a copse of trees near a pond where gnomes like to hang out!’

‘Then, to the park!’ announced John triumphantly, but hesitated as he saw Ben standing up again with a groan, thinking of his own aching legs. ‘Although maybe let’s take the bus instead?’

‘To the bus stop, then!’ exclaimed Freddie and the three men began to fast-walk in the direction to the bus stop. 

Despite their best intentions they didn’t make it far before encountering another obstacle. One moment they were all rushing at a fast, but physically acceptable, pace and the next, Freddie and John heard a crash behind their backs and found themselves fast-walking on their own. Looking back, they saw Ben sprawled on the sidewalk all over a man. A strangely familiar tall man wearing a police uniform.

‘Oh, shit,’ Freddie said.

‘Officer Lee.’ John was concerned.

Ben, on the other hand, didn’t seem too worried about the position he found himself in. It may even be argued that he actually seemed to be making the most of it, straddling the man, touching as much of his body as he could, smiling sweetly at him and touching his face. Freddie cursed the damn flirty familiar.

‘We need to go now, while he is confused, before his partner appears and starts to ask questions!’ Freddie warned, looking suspiciously around. Kenny’s place. What were the police officers doing there? That cursed weasel of a ghost always spelt trouble, even when he was alive and a second rate-wizard. They used to be friends, but they had fought a few decades ago and had been avoiding each other ever since. Not that Kenny had much a choice, considering he couldn’t actually leave the house, being a ghost and all. 

‘You guys go, I’ll take care of this and meet you there,’ Ben replied with a wink, quickly forgetting his former companions. John rolled his eyes and Freddie huffed.

‘Don’t get in any trouble!’ Were Freddie’s final words as he grabbed the bassist by the arm and dragged him to the bus stop. The last thing he saw before turning the corner was Ben grinning brightly and the officer responding with a loopy smile of his own. Freddie thought that there was something in that scene that they could use to their advantage and made a mental note to consider it later. But soon his thoughts turned back to Jim and all other matters disappeared from his mind. 

 

/\oo/\

 

Twenty minutes later, Freddie and John were waiting for the bus with varying degrees of patience. The young bassist calmly sat down, every so often checking the time on his phone, alternatively looking at the road and looking at Freddie with some concern. Freddie on the other hand was staring at the road, eyes fixed as if he could use his powers to compel the bus to come to them. Obviously, with no success. His hands were on his hips and his foot was tapping with impatience. Every few seconds he would huff loudly. 

‘I don’t think it’s coming,’ he said finally.

‘We’ve only been here for ten minutes. I’m sure it’ll come,’ John spoke softly trying to sooth the mercurial singer, but all in vain. There was a strange light in Freddie’s eyes.

‘Well, we can’t wait anymore. Any minute we delay, Jim gets farther and farther away from me.’

‘But he’s not leaving yet. He’s leaving in the morning.’

‘I meant emotionally,’ Freddie retorted. ‘Every moment that passes he will forget me a bit more. He might not even recognize me by the time we get there!’  

‘Right.’

‘We need alternative means of transportation,’ said Freddie decisively, looking at John with narrowed eyes. 

‘You mean like a taxi? I don’t know if I have enough money to…’

‘No, I don’t mean a taxi,’ said Freddie getting closer to John while looking up and down the young man’s body. ‘By the way, how much do you weight?’

‘How much do I…? I don’t... What are you planning, Freddie?’ John opened his eyes wide and took a step back, the singer advancing towards him with a determined look on his face.

‘Oh, nothing much. You’re not afraid of heights, are you?’ A fake tone of casualness resonated in his voice.

John took another step back again, and then another one, but then he found his back against a tree. He looked around, desperately trying to find some way to escape, but with a second wasted in hesitation it was too late. Freddie caught up with him and grabbed him by the shoulders. 

‘Freddie… You can’t be thinking… I’m much too heavy, you can’t possibly carry me as a bat! You’re going to drop me!’

Freddie laughed.

‘Don’t be ridiculous, John! Of course, I’m not carrying you as a bat! I’m not crazy.’

John heaved a sigh of relief, short-lived as Freddie tightened his grip on the young man and smiled wickedly at him, his prominent fangs shining in the moonlight.

‘Of course, I don’t actually need to be bat-shaped to be able to fly.’ 

In an instant, with short shriek from the bassist, both vampire and human were in the air. The feeling of emptiness under his feet made John dizzy. He closed his eyes tightly and decided not to open them again until he was back on solid ground.

‘Ooof, you are heavier than you look. You need to lay off those cheese on toasts of yours,’ said Freddie, breathing heavily. Normally he would fly higher when flying as a human, try to avoid the curious eyes of the city’s population, but carrying another body was taking its toll, even considering his super strength.

‘I’ll have you know my weight is exactly- arghgjrdfklnhljkh.’ John abruptly started coughing and it took him a few minutes to recover. ‘An insect just flew into my mouth!’

‘Oh, yeah. That happens, especially going against the wind. You get used to it. They are actually good for you. A great source of proteins, even for vampires. Although not as nice as blood. More crunchy.’

‘I don’t want to get used to it, I want to- askldjkladjasd.’ After spitting a second insect, John decided not to open his mouth again either until the end of the trip, which, thankfully, came very soon. 

Unfortunately, Freddie wasn’t very good at landing even at the best of times, and carrying an unwilling bassist was definitely very far from ideal, so he didn’t so much land as crash into one of the bushes that surrounded the park gates. 

‘Well, that went well,’ he said, rearranging his clothes as he exited the bush and picked some leaves and twigs from his hair. 

‘Yeah, no. Let’s not do this again. EVER,’ John stumbled out of the bush looking a mess and glared at Freddie. The singer got closer and tried to fix his clothing and hair, but the bassist batted his hands away.

‘Stop fussing! I’m mad at you. And your gnome is waiting!’ 

‘You’re right! I’ll fix your hair later. And maybe trim it a bit? A nice colouring would also-’

‘Freddie!’

‘Right! Let’s go! Actually, I don’t think we are very far...’

‘Well, look what we got here, lads. His royal highness himself’ said a sneering voice behind them. When John and Freddie turned around, they saw a group of young men in front of them. They were wearing leather trousers, jackets and boots. Their long hair was brushed back, greased and messy. The one doing the talking was a squinting man with a beaky nose and a dangerous sneer.

‘Wolves,’ Freddie muttered under his breath and hissed, baring his teeth at the newcomers. The werewolves started to growl at them softly. Tension filled the air. John just looked confused. 

‘Back from Germany already? Did they throw you out again?’ Freddie asked the young men with an obviously fake tone of camaraderie. ‘I’m surprised they let you back into the country. I thought dogs were checked for fleas and rabies at the border.’

‘So witty, maybe you should consider a career in comedy now that your music career is as dead as Tim.’ Answered the wolf. The other wolves laughed at this comeback and high-fived each other.

‘How do you know about Tim?’ Freddie demanded to know. He didn’t know that word had gotten out about the other vampire’s betrayal and his death and it made him angry. What right had this pups to talk about Tim. 

‘Everyone knows. The poor man tried to leave his talentless bandmates for another band, and you kill him in revenge. That’s cold, even for bloodsuckers like you.’

‘That’s not how it happened! He tried to kill us!’ The singer defended himself. ‘He was pure evil!’

‘Aren’t we all?’ The wolf smirked. Freddie just hissed in response. ‘And is this his replacement? A human? Or is he just a snack you carry around in case you get hungry?’

More laughs and high-fives from the wolves. 

‘I’ll have you know that this young human is the best bassist in the whole city!’ Freddie exclaimed proudly. 

‘Ha! We will see about that!’ said another one of the wolves, this one had a round face and the longest eyelashes John had ever seen. 

‘So why are you here anyway, I thought you were having the time of your lives in Hamburg.’

‘You didn’t think we’d miss the masquerade, did you?’ 

‘Oh, are still doing that quaint little silvery bee act?’ Freddie asked and now it was his time to smirk at the wolves. 

‘Silver Beatles,’ hissed Eyelashes.

‘Adorable,’ Freddie retorted dryly. ‘But you seem to have forgotten some of your bandmates on the continent. As far as I can tell, anyway. You all look the same to me. I guess you just aren’t very memorable, after all.’

‘I’ll give you memorable,’ Beaky-nose growled as he was starting to advance towards the vampire and his human friend. Freddie pushed John behind him and snarled, but Eyelashes had grabbed his bandmate by the arm and stopped his attack. 

‘We made some changes, actually. We got a new drummer and a new manager and we’re going straight to the top,’ Eyelashes said. 

From behind the leather-clad youths, another young man appeared. He was shorter than the others and was wearing a bright pink suit. He had bright blue eyes and a silver streak in his hair. He looked at Freddie and John with a sincere, friendly smile.

‘‘Ello,’ he said, waving at them.

‘Ritchie, don’t be friendly, we hate them,’ another with bushy eyebrows and sharp cheekbones muttered to him.

‘Oh, right,’ said the short man and started to glare at the other two men.

‘And where’s the rest of your merry band? We heard you are staging a comeback,’ asked the squinting one.

‘We are not staging a comeback because we never went anywhere,’ Freddie answered in a clipping tone.

‘Oh, that’s right. Nobody wants you anywhere. Don’t worry, son, when we win the Masquerade show, we'll make sure to mention you in our speech. Thanks to the old bloodsuckers for being so terrible, making us look so much better.’

‘Not that we need that, we can beat the best of them. Pity there’s hardly any competition for us here. The contest will be a piece of cake,’ Eyelashes added.

‘Why, you mangy dogs! You are nothing but some smelly greasy little puppies, with no talent and no style. We’ll see who comes on top!’

‘Mangy dogs! Come and say that to our faces!’

‘I just did! Who do you think I was talking to? Or do you also have dog brains in addition to their manners?’

The werewolves started to growl and howl. Freddie was ready to go against them when John caught him back.

‘Aren’t you forgetting something?’

‘Don’t worry, I can take them. They won’t hurt you.’

‘No, I mean, the reason why we are here?’

Freddie stopped in his tracks and looked at John, confused. A second later, it all seemed to dawn on him.

‘Don’t worry, you go. I can deal with them,’ John assured him. In a split second, he bent over and took his trusty knife from his sock and glowered at the werewolves.

‘What? You are going to let your tasty human treat fight for you?’ The werewolves laughed. 

‘How dare you call him a treat! I’m gonna…’ 

Freddie was about to launch himself at the wolves when John stopped him. 

‘Freddie, go! I can defend my own honour!’ John said.

‘Are you sure?’ Freddie asked doubtfully.

‘YES! I used to be in a gang, remember? Now, go!’

Freddie looked into John's eyes for a moment. His normally calm and relaxed expression was replaced by something fierce and wild. He didn’t want to leave him, but the bassist had proved himself stronger and braver than anyone had initially thought. If he said he could handle it, then Freddie had to trust him. 

The singer finally nodded. 

‘Keep safe, darling!’ He said as he ran away, leaving the young bassist behind with his knife and four angry werewolf pups. 

 

/\oo/\

 

‘Where do you think you are going?’ a rough voice asked Freddie from the dark. He had been fast-walking for a few minutes, crossing the park as fast as he could, trying to find the place where the gnomes usually gathered and avoiding all the dwellings of other creatures that may delay his search. 

When he turned in the direction of the voice, he saw three tall figures made even larger by the conical hats on their heads. He knew he had arrived at his destination. 

Freddie got closer to the figures and, although they loomed menacingly before him, he puffed up his chest and faced them looking far more calm and self-confident that he actually felt. 

‘I’m looking for Jim. I need to speak to him,’ he said, proud that his voice had not shaken to reveal how nervous he was.

The gnomes just laughed nastily and pushed him away.

‘Beat it, vampire scum.’

Freddie took a deep breath and stood his ground.

‘Just tell him that I’m here. He will want to talk to me,’ he insisted. 

‘Listen, parasite, the prince said he wanted to be alone. We’re not going to bother him for the likes of you.’ Another push. This time Freddie stumbled back and fell on his ass on the wet grass of the park. His eyes became red and alighted with fury. He clenched his fists and bared his teeth. In a second, he was standing up again and advancing against the three large gnomes.

‘No,  _ you _ listen to me, you big bearded oafs, you’re going to let me see Jim or else…’

‘Or else what?’ asked one the gnomes, amused.

‘Or else you’re going to regret it,’ answered Freddie coldly, eyes full of determination.

The gnomes just continued to laugh, which only made Freddie angrier.

‘You heard that? We are going to regret it.’

‘And now the little vermin thinks that he can boss us around,’ another one added.

‘I think maybe we should teach him a lesson,’ the third one suggested. 

Freddie remained undaunted, he stared defiantly at the biggest of the gnomes and smirked.

‘You can try,’ he hissed.

Freddie usually wasn’t too fond of fighting, preferring other methods of dealing with problems that didn’t wreak havoc in his meticulously crafted look and style. But there were moments to avoid a fight and there were moments to stand his ground in the name of love (or to defend a dear friend from a pack of mangy dogs). So, twice on the same night, Freddie prepared himself to attack. He charged against the three gnomes with all his might and with a shrill screech that would have made Roger proud, if he had been there instead of shacked up with a certain curly guitarist and completely oblivious of the crisis the Freddie was going through.  

Sadly, one skinny vampire was no match for the three large and burly gnomes and, although Freddie gave as good as he got for a while, eventually he was overpowered and pushed to the ground, face thrust against the wet grass. 

‘Let me go, you big brute!’ he shouted as one of the gnomes tied his hands to his back, but his voice was muffled and barely intelligible. 

‘Shut it, parasite! You’ve caused enough trouble already. Let’s see what the boss makes of you.’

‘Your boss? Jim?’ Freddie asked hopefully raising his head, after spitting out some grass that had made his way into his mouth.

‘The prince? Of course not, he may be royalty, but we only answer to our city boss. And she doesn’t take kindly to your kind. I bet she has some very interesting punishments in store for upstart little shits like you.’

‘What!? No, get off me! Jim! Jim!’  But Freddie could say no more as a dirty rag was forced into his mouth and he was dragged away into the darkness of the trees.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some eagle-eyed readers may have realised that the werewolf gang was actually the Beatles. And if the characterisation looks familiar is because I was heavily influenced by the amazing [Cirilee](https://cirilee.tumblr.com) an her Beatle comics (especially this one https://cirilee.tumblr.com/post/181426072827/so-this-is-basically-what-happened-in-my-canon). Her Teddy Boys era comics are just fantastic.


	17. The course of true love never did have so many gnomes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Freddie's Odyssey continues as he tries to get Jim back. But that's not all! There are also some revelations! Miami gets involved (very grudgingly)! The Beatles are still around (making trouble)! More gnomes!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, I want to thank my amazing beta [ wombatpop](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wombatpop/pseuds/wombatpop), who did a fantastic job editing this gargantuan chapter. 
> 
> And 100% of my Beatles characterisation is inspired by [Cirilee](https://cirilee.tumblr.com) and her amazing Beatles comics.

Freddie felt the thick ropes that bound him digging into the skin of his wrists. If he had had any circulation to speak of, they would definitely be cutting it. The gnomes had dragged him away from the main sections of the park and into one of the more secluded hideouts that existed on its edges. The place was a small clearing surrounded by a line of tall trees, growing so close to one another that they formed a sort of impenetrable wall around the open space. Only the pale light of the moon illuminated the small glade, and to Freddie it started to look more like an isolated cell in a dungeon than a park in the middle of the city. 

The gnomes had tied him to a tree and left him there, promising to come back with the boss. Freddie shuddered. Although gnomes were usually tranquil and peace-loving creatures who would never even consider harming another living thing, they tended to exclude vampires from that category and had no problem in hurting them. Most of them even saw it as natural retribution for the vampire’s parasitic nature. Whoever this “boss” was supposed to be, he wasn’t likely to merciful, so things didn’t bode well for the singer. He needed to find a way out. 

He wriggled about a bit trying to use his super-strength to break the ropes, but they remained tight and unbroken. Freddie supposed they might be magic ropes, but in truth, he hadn’t fed in a while and it was possible that the excitement from the last couple of days was starting to take its toll. 

Minutes passed, each one lasting an eternity. The strange silence that surrounded him started to unnerve him. There was no living creature around, no distant voices, no the noise from the city. Everything was eerily still. Even the breeze seemed to have stopped blowing. The trees around him were uncannily inert. They loomed menacingly over him, guarding and waiting, watching his every move. 

Minute after minute kept passing. Freddie kept struggling against the ropes but to no avail, they didn’t budge. He was still trapped. He wondered how long it would be until dawn came. It couldn’t be long and if it happened while he was still trapped, he would be completely at the mercy of the sun rays. But maybe that was the gnomes plan, leave him there to burn to ashes. He wondered where Jim was and if come morning, he would leave the city forever not knowing that Freddie had died for him, a martyr of his devotion for the gnome prince.

After what seemed like hours, the three burly gnomes came back with a fourth gnome accompanying them. The newcomer was definitely a she, shorter than the other three. She was wearing the same outfit as the others, except hers, Freddie noticed, was cleaner and nicer. Her white beard was also longer than that of the men and had been decorated with flowers. There was a friendly smile on her face and laugh lines around her eyes, her cheeks were red and chubby. All in all, she looked the picture of kindness, except for her eyes. Her eyes were cold and cruel. It made Freddie’s hair stand on end. 

‘Well, my dear, it looks like you’re in a bit of a pickle, aren’t you?’ The she-gnome giggled in the most disturbing way. Her voice was girlish and bubbly. Up close, she actually looked younger than he had originally thought. Her dead blue eyes pierced Freddie with her icy stare, friendly smile still firmly on her lips.

One of the other gnomes took the gag from his mouth. Freddie gathered as much bravado as he could muster and met her stare full on.

‘I usually am, darling,’ he answered flippantly, not showing the fear that he actually felt.  

The she-gnome frowned for a second, but soon her brow cleared, and she smiled again.

‘Such impertinence won’t do. I think it’s time somebody taught you a lesson.’

SLAP

Freddie’s cheek stung from where one of the burly gnomes had slapped him. 

‘Now, isn’t that much better, my dear? I’m doing this for your own good, you understand. Miserable little creatures like you should learn their place.’

‘Fuck you!’ Freddie exclaimed, his eyes wet with the tears of fury he was trying very hard not to shed. 

SLAP

‘Tsk, tsk. That won’t do. Insolent little things like you always get what they deserve, one way or the other.’

‘And you will get what you deserve once Jim finds what you are doing to me!’ Freddie spat out furiously. 

The she-gnome just laughed. 

SLAP

‘Don’t you get it, my dear? Your saviour is not coming. I’m sure he had his fun with you, but now that’s over. He is a prince and a gnome, too good for the likes of you.’

‘You don’t know anything!’ Freddie shouted and tears started to roll over his cheeks. 

SLAP

‘I know everything.’ Suddenly the friendly smile was gone and was replaced by an unpleasant sneer. She got close to Freddie and grabbed him by the hair. ‘He is a member of the nobility, a bunch of entitled bastards that think they are better than everyone else. Well, things are changing around here. With me as the new boss, the voice of the people will be heard.’

‘But Jim is nothing like that!’ 

‘True, but I have plans for him and a little vampire tart like you won’t get on the way, understood?’ She whispered in his ear. 

‘Let me go you hag! And stay away from Jim!’ Freddie shouted then spat on her face.

The she-gnome took a step back, her face a mask of pure hatred and fury. She rubbed a handkerchief on her cheek, then threw it on the grass with disgust and kicked it. 

‘Well, if that’s how you want to play it, my dear, then there’s nothing further to discuss.’ She walked up to Freddie again and grabbed him by the chin, so tightly that the singer could feel her sharp nails breaking his skin. ‘I want you to use your time until dawn to think about your behaviour, and when the sun comes out and you start to feel your body turn slowly and painfully into ashes, I want you to think of me and know that all of this is your own fault. Okay, sweetheart?’

Freddie just hissed at her baring his long teeth, but the she-gnome just laughed loudly and gave his face and extra-squeeze.

Suddenly, a noise came from behind them.  

‘What the hell is going on here?’ a sharp voice exclaimed. 

When the she-gnome turned around, Freddie had the chance to see behind her and was surprised. John and Ben were standing there looking furious, and with them, another gnome. He looked vaguely familiar. 

‘Freestone’, the she-gnome said, voice full of derision. 

‘I said, what are you doing?’ the gnome repeated calmly but firmly.

‘Protecting our territory and your precious prince as you should have been. Yet your forces let an enemy wander unpunished on our lands!’

‘It’s a public park, actually. Anyone can wander about,’ Ben intervened, but everyone ignored him.

‘That is a friend of the prince, not an enemy. He should be treated as a guest, regardless of his… species.’

‘A guest? Are you suggesting that we should welcome parasites into our kingdom? What’s next? Let them feed on us and our friends?’

‘Kingdom? It’s still a public park,’ Ben said to John. The gnome shushed him with a look.

‘It’s not for you to question the decisions of the Prince. If he accepts this creature as a friend, you have no right to go against it. Unless you are actually questioning the Crown’s authority.’

‘Of course not,’ she said through pursed lips. Both gnomes stared at each other for a few seconds that felt like an eternity. Finally, the she-gnome looked away with a huff and gave a signal to the three burly gnomes. They untied Freddie and pushed him towards his friends.

‘He and his friends should leave right now. I don’t think the others will like to hear about his Majesty’s little vampire friend roaming free around here.  _ Something bad may happen to him _ .’ The last part sounded more like a threat than anything else, but the gnome said nothing. He made a signal to John, Ben and Freddie and then he started to walk away from the clearing. They all followed him in silence, the others too frightened of saying something that would make the she-gnome change her mind. 

When they exited the density of trees and finally reached the brighter parts of the park, Freddie looked at the gnome again and was able to recognise him. 

‘You’re Jim’s bodyguard! Phil!’

‘It’s Phoebe actually, and you should leave,’ the gnome answered. 

‘But Jim… I have to….’

‘It’s too late, you have to leave. It won’t be long until she gets the word around. I won’t be able to defend you from a whole mob.’

‘Oh’ Freddie said defeated. ‘Can you at least give him a message? Tell him that I came?’

Phoebe looked away and said nothing. Despite having saved him, he obviously still didn’t like the singer or the fact that he was a vampire.

‘I see. Well, thank you for saving me I guess.’ Freddie’s eyes were full of tears, but he promised himself that he wouldn’t cry.

‘Just go,’ the gnome said and walked away, disappearing in between the trees.

‘Come on, let’s go, Fred,’ John wrapped his arm around Freddie and started guiding him towards the park’s exit. 

‘Well, thanks for nothing!’ Ben shouted angrily, then turned away and followed his friends sullenly. 

  
  


/\oo/\

  
  


‘This isn’t the end!’ Freddie exclaimed as he sat at the back of the empty bus with John and Ben. ‘If those gnomes think they can keep me away from Jim, they have another thing coming! I’ll show them!’

‘That’s the spirit! Stick it up to those gnomes!’ Ben said enthusiastically, his voice loud enough to reach the other end of the bus. The bus driver looked at the young men through the rear-view mirror and then shook his head, lamenting the state of the youth these days with their drugs and role-playing games. 

‘What are you going to do?’ John asked, a little concerned. 

‘I… am going to go… TO IRELAND!’ Freddie answered, making the most of his dramatic pauses. 

Ben gasped. John nodded at his friend, but with some hesitation.

‘Can you… I mean, being a vampire and all… can you actually… travel? Is it offensive to ask?’

‘Of course, it is! It’s the 21st century, John. You can’t ask something like that. Vampires can do everything people do! Right, Freddie?’

Freddie nodded solemnly. John sighed. 

‘Ok, so how are you going to do it? You’ll need to figure out departure and arrival times to make sure you don’t get any sunlight accidentally. And what if there is a delay?’

‘Nothing of that matters,’ Freddie said waving a hand and shaking his head. ‘Because… actually… I’M GOING GET INTO A BOX AND MAIL MYSELF LIKE A PRESENT!’

Ben, who was particularly sensitive to Freddie’s dramatic pauses, was left looking at the singer with wide eyes and mouth open.

‘That… is… A GREAT IDEA!’ he exclaimed excitedly.

John just covered his face with his hands. After a few minutes, he was recovered enough to share his input. 

‘Freddie, have you really thought this through? There is a lot of variables to consider. What if the package is lost? Or stolen? What if somebody opens it in broad daylight?’

‘John, darling, I appreciate your concern, but this plan is completely foolproof. First, it will allow me to travel safely inside a box and away from the sun. The package will get to its destination safely because we are not cheapskates, so we are going to pay for the express deluxe delivery. The package will be sent as a particular present for the prince from one of their allies with the instruction that only  _ he _ should open it. We’ll stick a sign on the outside indicating the contents of the box are light sensitive and should not be exposed to direct sunlight. And, most important of all, this is the only way I’ll be able to access Jim directly. If I go as myself, they’ll never let me see him, but this way, they won’t have a choice!’

‘That is brilliant! Like a Trojan Horse!’ Ben said smiling.

‘But won’t they suspect something is wrong?’ asked John, still unconvinced.

‘They might, but there is no gain without risk. And Jim is worth it.’ Freddie answered with a sad smile. ‘So, are you going to help me?’

‘Of course!’ Ben answered with no hesitation.

John considered the plan again. He had to admit it wasn’t as crazy as he had originally thought. Freddie might really be able to pull it off. 

‘And what about his address. Does he even have one? Don’t gnomes live, like, in the woods or something?’

‘Of course, he has an address! They are  _ royalty _ , John, not just some garden-variety garden gnomes! And I’ll ask Miami for it, I know he used to do business with Jim’s family some years ago.’

John sighed. 

‘Ok, I guess I’ll help you.’ He said with resignation. 

‘Excellent! Now that  _ that _ ’s settled, what the hell happened to you two? I waited for  _ hours _ !’

‘Freddie, it was forty-five minutes at most,’ John said frowning. 

‘Well, it felt like hours,’ Freddie pouted. ‘What kept you so long? You didn’t get in trouble with the police, didn’t you?’ He poked Ben’s chest accusingly, but the ex-bat look at him, an expression of pure innocence in his face. 

‘Of course not! Gwil… Officer Lee and I just talked for a bit. Although I don’t think his partner likes me very much.’

‘We need to stay away from them, their investigation can only mean trouble for us.’

‘Oh, right, erm…’ Ben looked away, making both Freddie and John first look at each other for a moment and then at Ben, narrowing their eyes.

‘What? What did you do?’ John asked, suspicious.

‘Nothing!’

‘You know you can’t lie to me, Ben. Tell us the truth!’ Freddie commanded with an imperious voice that usually threatened the use of his powers.

‘Fine! I’m seeing him in the morning. We are having brunch together.’ Ben looked down miserably.

‘Are you crazy! They are literally investigating your friends of murder! And you want to date one of them?’

‘Why not? First I can’t have Brian, now I can’t have Gwilym! This is not fair!’ Ben shouted stubbornly.

‘Have you thought that maybe Officer Lee only asked you out as a ruse to get information from you?’

‘No! I don’t… He wouldn’t…’ But Ben hadn’t considered that. Would Gwilym do that? He wouldn’t, would he? Ben was certain that the man was incapable of that level of subterfuge. ‘Gwilym wouldn't do that. And have you seen me? I’m irresistible! A total catch! Of course he wants to date me!’ 

‘Well, I think it’s stupid and not worth the risk,’ John declared. 

Freddie, who had been silent for a while, finally spoke. 

‘Actually, I think this is something that we can use for our advantage.’

‘Really? How?’ John asked. 

‘Well, Ben here can use his charms to get information about the case from him, and even feed him false information. It’ll allow us to keep a close eye on things.’

‘Hey! I can’t do that! I can’t betray him like that!’

‘But you are willing to betray  _ us _ …’

‘No! I just want to spend some time with him, that’s all!’

‘We broke the curse for you, we put a roof over your head, we gave you clothes and food…’

‘It was  _ my  _ food actually,’ John commented but was ignored.

‘... And this is how you repay us? This is how you repay Brian for all he did, your childhood friend and first love? By dating our enemy, a man that you’ve seen only a handful of times?’

Ben stayed silent for a moment, as he contemplated his choices. It was true that he owed the vampires and John a great deal, Brian especially. But he didn’t feel comfortable betraying Gwilym like that. There was something endearingly sweet about him. 

‘Fine, I’ll try to get information, but I won’t lie to him more than I need to,’ Ben finally said, trying for a compromise.

‘I suppose that’ll have to suffice,’ Freddie said resigned. 

John said nothing. He just stared out of the window in silence, his face inscrutable. Suddenly, he looked back at Freddie with a quizzical expression.

‘This isn’t the bus that takes us back to the house.’

‘Of course not, darling! We are going to Miami’s. We still need to figure out what’s going on with you two.’

A strange light shone in John’s eyes for a second. It made Freddie shiver. But it was gone so quickly that Freddie thought it might have just been a trick of the light. It  _ had _ been a very long night and he  _ was _ very hungry. 

‘You never told us what happened to you, darling? Did those wolf-pups give you any trouble?’

John shook his head and smiled gently.

‘Not really. I was ready to face them, but then…’

  
  


<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< FLASHBACK <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

 

‘Well, what are you waiting for?’ John asked wielding his knife in front of him, fully ready to kick some werewolf ass. 

Beaky-Nose took a step towards John and bared his teeth with a low growl. His fists were up and ready to fight.

‘Leave this to me, lads. As your alpha, it’s my duty to protect the pack,’ he said to his bandmates.

‘Say what now?’ Eyelashes asked bewildered.

‘I’m going to protect you from this knife-wielding maniac.’ Beaky-Nose lowered his arms and looked at the other man, confused as to why his heroic feat was being interrupted. 

‘No, not that. The part about you being the alpha?’ Eyelashes had his hands on his hips. 

‘Well, I  _ am  _ the leader of the band,’ Beaky-Nose said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Going by his bandmates’ faces, it obviously wasn’t. 

‘The hell you are!’ Bushy-Eyebrows exclaimed indignantly.

‘Sush, George, the adults are talking.’ Eyelashes said sharply, making the young wolf growl at him with. ‘What do you mean you are the leader of the band? Since when?’

‘Since always! I created this band!’

‘You created the old one! This is the  _ new  _ band and we created it together!’

‘So? Who else if not me? George? He is a baby! Ringo? He’s new!’

‘Actually, since I’m the oldest I should…’

‘SHUT UP RINGO!’ Both Beaky-Nose and Eyelashes shouted at the shorter man. 

‘Worth a try,’ he said as he shrugged his shoulders. 

‘And what about me?’ asked Eyelashes.

‘You, Paulie? Don’t make me laugh! You’re too soft to be the alpha!’ Beaky-Nose sneered.

‘I’m just as tough as you, and more capable even,’ insisted Eyelashes.

‘Well, only one way to find out,’ Beaky-Nose retorted, then he looked at John. ‘Son, you’ll have to wait your turn. We need to address some business first.’

John lowered his knife looking confused, but he didn’t put it away.

‘Come on, Paulie! Ready when you…’ but Eyelashes didn’t wait for the other man to finish before he lunged himself at him. Soon they were both rolling on the floor, growling and snapping their teeth. Every so often, Bushy-Eyebrows would kick at one of them at random and laugh. The fourth man, “Ringo”, just looked concerned. 

‘BOYS!’ A sharp voice came from behind the wolves. A well-dressed man was standing there looking furious. He was wearing a very smart suit and his hair was perfectly styled. His appearance contrasted sharply with the rough and unkempt youths. But the young wolves obviously recognised the man.

‘Shit!’ Beaky-Nose said as he let go of his bandmate and stood up and tried to fix his messy clothes.  

‘Eppy! It’s not what it looks like!’ Eyelashes said from the floor, breathing heavily.

‘Not what it looks like? Because it looks like you were brawling on the street when you were supposed to be home hours ago!’ The man had a serious expression on his face, and his voice sounded tense and furious. 

‘We were just defending ourselves, Eppy!’ Eyelashes said desperately. ‘There was this vampire we know, and he started to make fun of us. And then he took off leaving a human with a knife here to beat us up!’

‘I don’t want to hear any excuses. Look at the time! You were supposed to be in bed hours ago! I went to check in on you and you were gone! I had to track your scent through half the city. And what were you doing when I found you? Fighting amongst yourselves while the human with a knife watches!’ The man scolded, with a hint of disappointment. 

‘But Eppy! John said  _ he _ was the alpha of the group! He said that I was too soft to be the alpha,’ Eyelashes insisted. 

‘And for some reason, Paulie here thinks that  _ he _ is the alpha!’ Beaky-Nose retorted.

‘Enough! I expected this from you, John. But  _ you  _ too Paul? I’m deeply disappointed… Alphas indeed!’ 

Eyelashes, whose name was apparently Paul, had the decency of looking ashamed. He stood up and muttered ‘Sorry, Eppy.’ Beaky-Nose, John, didn’t say anything. His eyes were fixed on the ground. 

‘And what about you two? Why didn’t you stop this?’ The man pointed at the two other bandmates, who gulped and looked down looking guilty.

‘Sorry, Eppy,’ they mumbled, looking properly chastised. 

‘As for you, young man,’ the man said talking to John and startling him a little, ‘What’s your name?’

‘Erm, John. John Deacon.’

‘Well, let me tell you something Mr Deacon,  I don’t know if you make a habit of intruding on people with a knife or if this was a one-time thing, but let me assure you that if I ever see you threatening my boys again, you’ll have  _ me _ to deal with, understood?’

John just nodded. 

‘And the same goes to that vampire friend of yours. Tell him that these boys are my pack and I  _ will _ protect them.’ The man spoke in a low growl and there was a menacing glow in his eyes. Despite his seemingly harmless appearance, the bassist suspected that he was a dangerous man to meddle with. 

John gulped and nodded again. The man smiled and his whole demeanour changed. Suddenly, he looked friendly and charming. 

‘Excellent! Now boys, time to go to the flat. Big day tomorrow. We have an appointment with my tailor first thing in the morning!’

‘But Eppy,’ Werewolf-John said pouting a bit, ‘Can we go to get a drink first? We wanted to celebrate.’

‘Oh, very well. But only one, mind you! I don’t want to have to deal with hangovers tomorrow! Let’s go!’

The man disappeared down the corner, followed by the group of rowdy werewolves and leaving John standing there, lost in confusion.

  
  


<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< END  FLASHBACK <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

  
  


‘Interesting,’ said Freddie pondering the story John had just told him. ‘Who could this Eppy person be?’

‘They did mention a new manager. Maybe that’s him,’ John said.  

‘Yeah, maybe. We will need to keep an eye on them. I hate to admit it, but they are probably our biggest competition for the Masquerade.’

John thought for a moment and then asked: ‘Should we get a manager?’ 

‘That wouldn’t be a bad idea, actually. If those curs have one, I don’t see why we shouldn’t.’

‘I can be your manager!’ Ben said suddenly, sounding very excited. ‘I’m really good at managing things.’

John and Freddie exchanged a look of alarm. Then the singer put his arms around the familiar’s shoulders and spoke kindly to him.

‘We wouldn’t even dream to burden you like that, darling. We first need to find out more about what’s happening with you and John. Maybe in a couple of years, you can try.’

Ben pouted but still nodded.

‘I guess. So, who are you going to ask?’

‘I have an idea,’ Freddie assured him with a cheeky smile. 

  
  


/\OO/\

 

‘Absolutely not.’ 

‘Oh, come on, Miami! You are the best man for the job!’ Freddie insisted. 

They were all sitting in Miami’s booth at his club. The place was, as usual, half-empty. Various groups of creatures gathered in the booths, talking and laughing. Others preferred to skulk in the dark corners as they sipped their drinks. The warlock surveyed everything with his watchful eyes. Having several different supernatural creatures socializing under one roof always created a volatile atmosphere, so Miami had to constantly stay on top of things so that any conflict wouldn’t get out of hand. 

‘I don’t know if you noticed, Freddie, but I already have a job.’

‘A job that bores you to tears, darling! You need something more exciting!’ exclaimed the singer.

‘And you think that babysitting a group of overgrown vampire babies and their human pet is going to give me that excitement?’

‘Of course! Tell him, John. Tell him how exciting it is to be part of the band?’ Freddie nudged the bassist hoping to get some assistance. 

‘Never a dull moment,’ John responded in a deadpan voice.

‘A moving testimony,’ Miami said with a stony voice. ‘But be that as it may, I won’t do it. I don’t mind helping you from time to time, but you guys can’t go five hours without getting into some sort of trouble and that’s more than I can handle full time.’

‘But Miami…’ Freddie pleaded. 

‘My answer is no and that’s final.’

‘Ahem.’ Someone coughed. In front of them, there was a man wearing a suit obviously trying to get their attention. 

‘Beach,’ the stranger said curtly. 

‘Epstein,’ Miami spit out with disgust.

Surprisingly, the man turned to John and smiled. 

‘Mr Deacon. A pleasure to see you without a knife, a pity I can’t say the same about the company.’

‘What do you want?’ asked Miami curtly. 

‘I wanted to talk with Mr Mercury. It’s a private matter. So, if you could just…’ the man made a signal with his hand to indicate that Miami should leave, but the warlock ignored it.

‘You have some nerve asking me to leave  _ my _ booth in  _ my own  _ club.’ His voice was cold and menacing.

‘Well, if you had any manners, I wouldn’t have to ask,’ retorted the man airily. 

‘He can stay. We keep no secrets from him,’ Freddie quickly assured him.

‘As you wish. I was talking with the boys about your encounter earlier tonight and I realised that they may have said some things that were out of place. So now they want to apologise.’

‘The boys?’ Miami asked frowning. 

‘The Beatles, the band I’m managing. Surely you must have heard of them. They are the biggest up and coming band this year.’

‘Never. But of course, I can’t dedicate any of my precious time for every upstart little band that gets a hit.’

‘A pity. But don’t worry, soon they’ll become so famous you won’t be able to escape them.’ The man smirked and Miami’s frown deepened.

‘If you say so. Is that them skulking over there? Nice lot.’

‘Yes, come here boys. Tell Mr Mercury how sorry you are.’

The group of boys was obviously not happy to be there. They stared at Freddie and John with open animosity. Only Ringo looked mildly amused with the situation. 

‘Hello again!’ The short man said cheerfully, before receiving a series of dirty looks from the rest of his pack. 

‘Well? We don’t have all night,’ said Miami coldly. ‘We were actually in the middle of something.’

‘Right... boys?’ Epstein nodded. 

Paul took a step forward, seemingly the designated spokesperson for the group. 

‘We are very sorry to have called you old untalented murderers, has-been musicians, terrible bloodsuckers and stupid parasites,’ he said in an even, monotonous voice that lacked any sort of emotion or inflexion.

‘You never called us stupid parasites,’ Freddie commented.

‘Not to your faces,’ George mumbled and werewolf-John snickered. 

Miami frowned and Epstein glowered at the two werewolves. Then he turned to Freddie.  

‘Well?’ he asked.

‘Well what?’

‘Don’t you have something to say in return?’ Epstein inquired.

‘Oh, like, sorry to have called you mangy dogs, dog-brained puppies, unmemorable and untalented?’ Freddie asked, looking innocent. 

‘Precisely.’

‘Then no, because we are not sorry at all. Actually, we still stand by everything we said.’ The vampire smirked. 

Epstein gasped, the wolves’ faces became furious and started to growl threateningly at the vampire. Miami just rubbed his hands on his face and sighed. 

‘I cannot believe such rudeness. My boys here came to apologise with the best intentions….’ Epstein exclaimed, infuriated. 

‘Best? That was a fake apology if I ever saw one,’ Fred interrupted, just as infuriated. 

‘You have no way to prove that! It was completely heartfelt. It came from the bottom of our hearts.’ Paul exclaimed angrily.

‘It came from the bottom of something,’ muttered John.

‘And you know what you can do with it? Shove up your…’

‘Enough! If you had a manager, sir, I’d be having words with them. This behaviour is completely unprofessional and unacceptable.’

‘Actually, they do have a manager,’ Miami said with a smirk.

‘We do?’ Freddie asked, confused.

‘Who?’ Brian Epstein looked around, seeming to expect the vampire’s manager to materialise from thin air at that precise moment. 

‘Me,’ Miami said smirking, making Freddie gasp. ‘I am their manager. And as such, I must ask you to please stop bothering my clients. They make their position perfectly clear and that should be enough.’

‘You? A manager? Well, that explains such ungentlemanly behaviour. Come on boys, these people are not worth our time.’ Epstein said, appalled. 

‘Bye, guys! It was nice meeting you!’ Ringo managed to say with a smile and a wave, before being dragged by away by George. It was obvious that the wolves wanted to stay and defend their honour, but, with the last growl in Freddie’s direction, they followed their manager to the exit and disappeared from view.

‘Were you serious? Are you really going to be our manager?’ John asked Miami once the wolves were gone. 

‘I guess now I have to, but I warn you, you’d better win that damn Masquerade. If we lose to that bastard Epstein’s dogs, I’m going to personally stake you to death.’

‘Oh, Miami! I knew you cared!’ Freddie exclaimed with a smile, throwing himself at the warlock and peppering his face with kisses.

‘No, get off you slimy parasite, you are going to cover me with glitter!’ Miami moodily pushed the vampire away and started to dust the tiny glitter particles off his clothes and face.

‘So, what’s the deal between you and this Brian Epstein guy? There was a lot of tension between you.’ Freddie asked wagging his eyebrows.

‘No! Stop that! There was no tension, and nothing is the deal between us. He is just an acquaintance with whom I share normal amounts of tension.’

‘A normal acquaintance for whom you took a job you didn’t want just to spite him. Sure, that checks out,’ John added.

Soft snores came from the corner of the booth. Ben had arranged himself into a tight ball and had fallen asleep.

‘Well, I am a very spiteful person.’ Miami insisted.

‘Fine, don’t tell us. But I’m going to find out eventually, darling!’ Freddie promised with an evil grin.

‘No! There will be no finding out and that’s an order. My first order as your manager, in fact: not getting involved in my private life,’ Miami said sharply.

‘Ooooh, so he’s part of your  _ private _ life.’

‘Freddie, let it go,’ Miami snapped.

‘Fine,’ Freddie answered, although he obviously had no intention of letting it go. 

‘Well, if that is all…’ Miami stood up ready to leave the vampire and his friends for the night and finally get some peace and quiet.

‘Actually, we have some things we wanted to talk with you about.’

‘Oh, my god, it starts. You are already in trouble and now I’m going to get sucked into it.’

‘I didn’t say we were in trouble, we just wanted to chat with you about something.’

‘Fine, what is it?’ The warlock sat down again, resigned.

‘Where can I start? Oh, right. Remember Brian’s pet bat, Benny?’

‘No.’

‘Oh, well. Brian had this tiny pet bat Benny. Well, it turns out that Benny was not a bat at all but actually a man in the form of a bat. And it turns out he was actually helping Tim all along in his plan to kill us, but at the last moment he tried to save us so we forgave him, and then we found some magic books and we thought maybe we could use them to turn him back into a human! And John did the spell and it worked!’ 

Miami frowned, John nodded excitedly. 

‘And then we found out that he had been killed by Tim ages ago and then brought back by a necromancer who used him as a familiar! And not only that, but he was actually Brian’s childhood friend and he had been in love with Brian for years, for some reason, and that caused a lot of tension with Roger, as you can imagine, but it was also good because it ended up bringing them together. Roger and Brian, I mean. Not Ben and Brian. And now everything is fine, except Ben’s trying to date one of the policemen who are investigating us about some disappearances that are actually Tim’s fault, but we have no way to prove it. But I won’t go into that.’

‘Won’t you? What a pity…’ Miami said sarcastically under his breath, but Freddie ignored him.

‘You know Jim? My gnome? He thought me and Benny were an item and now he is leaving for Ireland in the morning because he thinks that’s for the best and I’m planning on sending myself on the mail as a present and I’m going to need for you to get me his address. Anyway, that’s beside the point, it turns out that something must have gone wrong with the spell that John used to break the necromancer’s curse because now Benny is compelled to obey all of his commands and that puts him in a very bad place, especially after being a slave for the necromancer for so long. Oh, that’s him sleeping in the corner there, in case you didn’t notice him’

‘I did notice, I was just ignoring him.’

‘And that’s pretty much it.’ Freddie said looking at John, checking whether he had forgotten something. The bassist nodded. 

‘Oh,  _ that _ ’s all.’

‘Pretty much, I omitted some things for the sake of brevity.’

‘God, I’ve been your manager for about 10 minutes and I’m already regretting the decision.’

‘It’s not that bad.’ Freddie said. 

‘Oh, I know. Considering who I’m talking to, I’m guessing it could have been  _ much _ worse.’

‘Exactly!’ Freddie said brightly.

Miami just sighed and resigned himself to his fate.

‘Ok, first things first, the spell. Doing shit like that is dangerous, even for experienced practitioners. And it also requires quite a bit of power. Are you sure you’ve never done magic before?’

‘I think I would have noticed,’ John said dryly.

‘Not necessarily, not if you are a natural. Not all magic requires spells. Has anything strange ever happened to you?’

‘What? Like Harry Potter?’

‘Don’t even mention that garbage.’

‘Well, other than making friends with a group of vampires, killing another one, meeting werewolves, goblins, garden gnomes and warlocks and discovering magic is real, no I can’t really say anything strange has ever happened to me. Well, my nana Edna said that I used to make friends with the fairies when I was a child, but I think she just meant that I didn’t have a lot of friends except imaginary ones.’

‘Well, I guess it’s possible… wait, nana Edna? Did you say Edna?’

‘Yeah?’

‘What’s your name again?’

‘Mmm, John?’ Miami balks at John’s hesitation.

‘Aren’t you sure? And I mean your last name.’

‘Oh, Deacon, John Deacon,’ he answered embarrassed. 

‘You don’t come from Leicester, do you?’

‘I… I do, actually.’

‘That’s it, that explains it!’ Miami almost shouts. 

‘Explains what? What does nana have to do with anything?’

‘Your nana, she is Edna Deacon!’ John had never seen the warlock so excited. 

‘Yes, I know. I’ve met her,’ John said confused. 

‘Edna Deacon is one of the most powerful witches in England! She is the leader of the Black Moon coven!’

‘You can’t be serious, my nana Edna is not a witch! She bakes cookies and makes marmalade. She knits sweaters. She’s a churchwarden!’

‘Those things are not mutually exclusive. And being close to the church makes sense, very easy access to cemeteries.’

‘Why would that be important?’

‘You don’t want to know. And believe me, your nana? She’s terrifying. I only met her once and she almost made me piss my pants.’

‘Wait, does this mean that I actually played with fairies when I was a child?’

‘Probably.’

John shivered slightly.

‘Would that explain John and Benny’s little predicament?’ asked Freddie.

‘Maybe, but I can’t say much without actually seeing the spell. It’s already unusual that your friend was alive at all. Usually, reanimated corpses die when their masters do. My guess would be that the curse kept the familiar alive in his animal form and that the spell didn’t actually reverse the curse, but rather transferred familiar-ownership to the person doing the spell.’

‘So, you are saying that Ben is my familiar now?’

‘I guess so. That’s why he’s compelled to obey you. Although, I’d need to see the actual spell to be sure. Do you remember its name?’

John tried in vain to remember, but somehow the memory seemed distant and unattainable. 

‘Mmm, something in Latin, I think.’ 

‘Very useful,’ Miami said dryly.

‘I have the book back in the house. I’ll bring it tomorrow.’

‘Fine. But I should warn you, it’s possible that any attempt to release your friend from the bond will result in him returning to his original state.’

‘His original state?’ John looked confused.

‘A corpse.’

Freddie gasped. Then both him and John looked at the sleeping figure with worry in their eyes.

‘Let’s not get ahead,’ John said calmly. ‘We won’t be sure until you see the book.’

‘True. Now, as for your gnome problem, Freddie, I think mailing yourself is the most stupid thing that I’ve ever heard.’

‘So, you won’t get me the address?’ Freddie asked ready for a confrontation. 

‘Oh, no, I  _ will _ get you the address,’ Miami replied calmly. ‘I just thought it was my duty as your manager to inform you of how idiotic the whole thing is. I’ll give it to you tomorrow. Now leave, I’m sick of the sight of you.’

Freddie and John stood up and looked at Ben.

‘Should we wake him?’ John asked. The young man looked so innocent and angelic while he slept, that it seemed a pity to wake him.

‘Yes, I’m not carrying him,’ Freddie declared without hesitation. 

‘Ben, time to go home.’ John’s soft voice did nothing for the ex-bat. 

‘BEN.HOME.NOW,’ Freddie said louder.

The sleeping man suddenly opened his eyes and sat up, looking around. Then he remembered where he was and what they were doing there.

‘Did we find out how to reverse the compelling thing?’

‘We’re working on it.’ John avoided the man’s eyes, but Ben didn’t seem to notice.

‘Ok.’

Miami looked at them through narrowed eyes, then sighed.

‘Wait, it’s too close to the sunset. I’ll call you an Uber.’

‘I beg your pardon?’ Freddie, who wasn’t up to date with the modern world, had no idea what the warlock was talking about.

Benny looked both confused and sleepy. Only John really understood the statement.

‘But we don’t have any money,’ John berated himself for not getting some of the money they had found in the basement to use for their expenses.  

‘I’m your manager, I’ll pay…’

‘That's nice of you.’

‘... and then file it as a business expense and get the money back along with my next commission. I’m taking 20% by the way.’

 

/\OO/\

 

The house was silent when they came back. Ben decided to go immediately to bed, mumbling something about ‘beauty sleep’ and ‘brunch date’. John found his backpack and Tim’s magic books laying on the kitchen table, the same place where he had left them after the commotion of Jim’s letter. And, although Freddie invited him to stay over, he decided to get back to his dorm room. He left, after promising Freddie to come to pick him up the following night so they could go to Miami’s. 

And so Freddie was left all alone. An orange glow had started to peek over the horizon. He felt an ache in his chest that had nothing to do with the arrival of the dawn or the night’s adventures, and everything to do with Jim. In just a few hours, the gnome would be beyond his reach. He hadn’t shown it to the others, but the idea of losing Jim was breaking him apart. It had taken him so long to find someone to love, someone as good and perfect as the gnome, and now he was going away, leaving him all alone again. Despite everything he did, how much he had fought for him, nothing had worked. Freddie felt helpless and useless. He liked to show a brave face for his friends, but in truth, he wasn’t too confident about his plan. It would be his last desperate attempt to get his Jim back and if it failed… he didn’t want to even think about it. 

He went around the house slowly, going from room to room closing blinds and windows. Upstairs, he noticed the door to Roger’s cupboard wide open. It was empty and messy. Clothes laid on the floor, haphazardly strewn and forming a path towards Brian’s room.  Freddie took a peek inside and saw his friends cuddling inside of Brian’s coffin and covered with a cosy blanket that looked to be one of Roger’s creations. The image made him feel sad. He was glad his friends had finally gotten their shit together, but, at that moment, it made him feel more lonely than ever. 

He closed the door and went to his own room. Delilah was waiting for him there and jumped to his arms as soon as he saw him. He hugged her tightly. 

‘You are all I have left, Delilah,’ he sighed dramatically. ‘I know that you would never leave me, darling.’

Delilah just purred and butted her head against his chest. It made Freddie smile. He put her down on a pillow and he started to get changed and ready for sleep. Being dead was hell on his complexion, so he had a very strenuous skin-care routine. He was right in the middle of it, at one of the most critical parts (dry skin was the curse of the undead and moisturizing heavily was the only cure), when Delilah raised his head, ears standing on attention, and promptly ran off.

‘Delilah!’ Freddie shouted annoyed. 

He followed the cat downstairs and found her in front of the front door, mewing desperately. 

‘It’s too late to go out now, you can go back outside tonight,’ he said firmly, but when he stooped to pick her up, the cat hissed at him. ‘Delilah! Fine, go outside, leave me too.’

As soon as he opened the door, the cat ran off and disappeared in the bushes. Freddie was about to close the door, when he noticed, right there in his garden, a red conical hat in between the flower beds. 

‘No, it can’t be.’ But he still went outside. He could feel his skin stinging a little. The light of the dawn wasn’t strong enough to burn, but it was still painful. He felt a heavy weight on his limbs and a drowsiness that made his head fuzzy. The hat had been laid on the grass. He took it and hold it against his chest. He recognized its scent immediately: it was Jim’s. His knees soon gave up, he could feel his muscles numbing. Tears ran through his face. And then, everything went black. 

**Author's Note:**

> Please, comment and let me know what you think!


End file.
